Title: Goodbye

Pairing: 8059

Summary: Gokudera knows how dangerous the mafia is, and each time they part, he can't help but wonder if this time will be the last time he sees Yamamoto.

Notes: I own nothing. Also, how the hell is 'Goodbye' a message you want on your candy hearts? I think that would send the wrong message…


Gokudera knows he's strong. He's had a pretty good track record for his missions, though he knows a lot of them he's had help on. And he knows that Yamamoto is strong, too, and that it would take a lot for either of them to be killed.

But it seems like that's what the world likes to throw at them. Gokudera's not stupid. He knows he's strong, but the world of the mafia is strong as well, and filled with dangers. If he ends up living as long as the Ninth did, he'd be an insanely lucky man.

So he knows that every mission he goes out on, he might die. There is a statistical chance of failure that ends in death that he doesn't mean to compute, but it's like a morbid pleasure, knowing what the chances of him surviving are. And if he ends up living through the bad odds, then he feels all the stronger. But the hanging threat of death is always close to his throat, and he knows it's the same with Yamamoto.

They're living in the same quarters now. Too many nights spend tangled in the other's sheets and staying there until morning before they realized they were in the closest kind of relationship one could have, and so they packed their bags and moved in together.

Sometimes Tsuna sends them out on missions together, because he knows, Gokudera would never lie to him, and he understands. But often they have to spread their strengths and go their separate ways. Those missions are always the ones Gokudera has to calculate his chances of living, because they always drop whenever he's not with Yamamoto. Only because the man's so strong, not because Gokudera is silently moping and unhappy that they're apart.

They're usually given a couple of days warning before they have to go out on a mission, enough time for the two to cling to each other at night, drinking in as much of the other as they can before they have to leave again. And when the time comes for one of them to leave their home, Gokudera will always say goodbye and seal it with a kiss.

He has to be careful. He knows that either one of them could die any day now, and he doesn't want to take the risk of letting some sour words be the last thing he says to Yamamoto. It hasn't happened yet, though they've had some close calls, but every time one of them walks out that door, he has to do it. Nothing will change if he doesn't say it, there won't be some strike of horrible luck that causes his worst fears to be realized, but he has to do it.

Because he doesn't know how many times he'll be able to say goodbye before he'll have to stop.