Confessions of a Fuckboy
Jake, suffering from his divorce with Rose, placates his negative emotions by sharing his bed with Trixie every night. But when she has had enough of Jake's reluctance to commit, it lands Jake in a tight spot and he has to make a decision. And he needs to make one fast, before his second shot at happiness could walk out of his door and out of his life, forever.
We both sit in silence, both unsure of what to say. Trixie has been crying for the past hour, her throat scraped raw from our emotional screaming match. I'm drained too; I have no more fire to fight anymore, my body glued to the couch from the lack of energy. Trixie gets up, straightens her clothes, turns to me and says,
"I've had enough, Jake."
I close my eyes and inhale sharply.
I know now where this is going.
"I'm ready to walk out this door, Jake. And you have to understand, once I walk out that door, it's too late. I'm walking out that door and I won't look back. And let me tell you, Jake. You are making the biggest mistake of your life if you let me walk out this door."
The moment of truth.
I instead stare at her. She looks back, her pretty brown eyes puffy with tears. She's pleading with me to make my decisions, but I can't. This is too much in too little time. Time. I need so much more time.
Trixie gives me one good look, and makes her way to the door.
Stop her, I feel my brain scream. Stop her before you'll regret it for the rest of your life!
"Trixie, please. I need more time."
"Time," she snorts, "you had more than enough already."
She picks up the pace, her Chanel perfume kissing my senses. Even her scent is telling me goodbye.
I get up, but I'm rooted to the ground. My feet won't move to stop her.
"You are letting a damn good woman slip through your fingers, Jake."
Flashes of our time spent together hit me. Our first play date, our first day at school, the first day we met Spud, our first time skateboarding. Our nights spent in my room looking up at the ceiling talking about our futures. The times she risked her life for me and I hers. The first night we spent making love. The first time she told me she loved me. Our first time spending time together without Spud, learning each others secrets. The first time I imagined her wearing my grandmother's ring and her taking my last name.
All of those memories are fading with every step she took. By the time her hand touches the door, all of them vanish. Tears are now clouding my judgment.
Those memories will die with her.
"Goodbye, Jake."
