Disclaimer: I don't own Umineko, it is owned by Ryukishi07
This Fanfic is spawned from the deepest pits of my mind after being sick, reading shit fanfics and listening to the Robot Unicorn Attack song…
Always I want to be with you and make believe with you and live in harmony harmony, OH DESIRE!!!!! YAMI WO KIRISAKU, OH DESIRE!!!!!!!!!
Prologue: OH DESIRE
The doors of the Ushiromiya mansion burst open as a girl came in.
"Hello my name is Hanyuu Ushiromiya! I am Battler and Beattrice's hermaphrodite child!!"
Flinging Natsuhi aside, Goat-Kun appeared. She was lead inside Kinzo's study, where she was thrown into a pit of lava surrounded by flying pianos that sounded like elephants. Inside the pit of lava were the charred remains of several Mary Sues, unoriginal OCs, and God OCs.
"They keep ruining our game!" Beatrice whined.
"This is just too much to try to explain… It's useless, it's all useless!" Battler bellowed out his same catchphrase.
It truly was sad, even Virgilia and Ronove were gone. There were so many intrusions in the game, they were sent out to get rid of all the invaders. Even with the help of them and the legions of Goat-Kuns, there were still so many that the game was flung into complete chaos. Nothing could keep the intruders out, no magic, nor anti-magic, not even Knox's Decalogue. The entire timeline was ripped to shreds. Erika had been murdered the second twilight due to another witch, Erika's meta form even disappeared. On the third twilight, Dlanor disappeared, it was assumed that a copy of Battler had raped her and they both disappeared. The fifth twilight, the original Beatrice had been revived by unknown means. Through all this chaos, Bernkastel and Lambda were somehow banished halfway through the fourth twilight. There was no game master now.
"This is enough!" Battler yelled, "I have saved this until the end, I didn't think I would have to use this…"
"What?" Beatrice asked.
Through the blue truth, Battler proclaimed "It doesn't matter, everyone is Kinzo!"
Unfortunately, due to the chaos, the game screwed it up, and changed it into the golden truth. Everything changed. The rift closed, but at a price. And now, here's the beginning to the end. Everyone became Kinzo, for one final game.
