Ok, so my mind was wandering near the end of the school day today, and came across this. It's just a short little oneshot from Reid's POV.

Carpe diem. Seize the day. Easier said than done. How can one seize the day when one doesn't know what one wants? How can one figure out what one wants when everyone else is making demands of them? When they are expected to live up to boundless expectations of decent character and selfless sacrifice, how can they not feel as if they are trapped in a life that they never asked for? When the lines between what they want, what you want, and what everyone wants begin to blur, how does one tell up from down, truth from fiction? How does one know oneself?

I didn't ask for this. Any of this. I want a normal life, with normal friends, and a normal family. I don't want to stare at countless victims every day and force myself to look past the tragedy. I don't want to remember everything every killer we've ever caught has said and wrote. I don't want to wake up in the middle of the night screaming from senseless nightmares and have no one to turn to. I don't want to be alone anymore.

You don't see it. None of you see it. I'm not cut out for this. You are, you all are made of stronger merit than I ever was. You compartmentalize, you drink, you party. You forget. I can't. Every image we put on the screens, every pair of glassy eyes that we face, is forever imprinted in my brain. I tried, oh God I tried. I wanted to escape, to run, to be rid of my own mind and memories. I slipped, and I fell, and still you didn't see it.

This job wasn't for me. Perhaps, had I realized this fact sooner, this could have ended differently.

I'm sorry.

Review, it feeds my ego.