Jack's appearance on "The Weakest Link"
By: BooBoo

Foreword: It's been a while but I'm coming off my writing vacation and this is my first HM fic since the trilogy. That was a pain to write. Note to writers "NEVER WRITE A TRILOGY!!!"
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Host: Welcome to the weakest link. Since I'm experiences severe hemorrhoids and I don't feel like putting up with you uneducated slobs we have 5 contestants . Lets meet them. Bill tell us what you do.

Bill: I design underwear for elderly people.

Host: I know they make me feel sexy

Bill: mmmmmmmm... I love it

Jack: I don't

Host: Shut up, how about you Elka

Elka: I'm-a Sveedish

Jack: No-a sheet

Host: Jack you are incompetent

Jack: Can Ex-lax cure that

Elka: that's-a constipated

Host: It is your turn Floppy, you brainless piece of poop

Floppy: As a wise man once said "Man who stand on toilet is high on pot"

Host: I will decide who is wise and by the meaning of what you just said you must be a stupid ass

Floppy: Spankx

Host: Jack

Jack: I'm a farmer

Host Ha... your a f***ing looser

Jack: That's not what my pitch fork thinks

Host: Let's forget that. Last, introduce yourself Ron

Ron: I'm unemployed and I sit on my ass all day and drink beer

Host: so your an average American

Host: Let's start. Bill, What word does "therapist" turn into

Bill: UUUMMM... The rapist

Host: correct. Elka, when was Jesus born

Elka: In a Sveeden

Host: no I asked when

Host: Floppy what are you

Floppy a wise man

Host: No a fagot hahaha. Jack, what is 3*7

Jack: 21, I ain't stupid

Host: even if you were right I'm always on my period and I hate you

Jack: thank you, Mrs. Superwhore

Host: Bill, (all of a sudden the lights went out and gunshots rang out)

(Every body in the studio exept Ron and the host were shot to death. The host had a pitch fork in her head with a note that said " I told you so you incredible bitch." Jack had disappeared and Ron was sittind there sleeping with a brew in his left hand)

ANOTHER UNSOLVED MYSTERY
GOIN' DOWN IN HISTORY