Hi everyone! Welcome to the first part of a "What if?" story inspired by Noel's CS Gag Reel.

First part: Hazama's invitation and his proposal.

Disclaimer: BlazBlue and its characters are not my property, but are Arc System Works's.

Before closing this author note, I'll thank Vesperian-Ivia-Elemental for having served as my beta reader.

Please enjoy that story!


When Hazama called the cook, wanting to know who made this delightful – for him at least – dish, Noel became beside herself with giddiness, "A fan of my cooking…I must be presentable for him!", she said, straightening her apron, all the while giggling and sporting a dreamy smile.

"Yeeeees?! Did somebody call me?", she said happily, oblivious to the pitiful state of all the other customers, before noticing who called for her, "…c-captain?! Reporting for duty, sir!", she then said, throwing a hasty salute. "Hello lieutenant. I wasn't aware of your side-job as a cook.", said Hazama, amused at Noel's obvious embarrassment. "N-no, it's not what you think…I can explain everything…", answered Noel, bowing her head in an attempt to hide her flustered face.

"Now, now, no need to be so anxious…how about as a token of my gratitude I invite you to that lovely café in upper Kagutsuchi, near Government House? You have the day after tomorrow off, don't you?", said Hazama, putting on his best reassuring smile. "Y-yes…", replied Noel, still overwhelmed with the situation. "Then it's decided", Hazama said, clapping his hands and getting up, "join me in front of Government House in two days at 4 pm. By the way, my compliments for the dish. It was exquisite.". Then Hazama left, leaving a stunned Carl and a daydreaming Noel in his wake.

"…", said Nirvana. "Ah, you're right sister! We should take care of the passed out customers! Miss Noel, could you help up to wake the others?", said Carl, reminded by his sister of the sorry state of his customers. "R-right, I'll go fetch some water!", said Noel, snapping from her daydream and rushing in the kitchen, "Here is some water, I'll go fetch some more!", said Noel, coming back with four pots of water and rushing back to get some more.

"Ragna seems to have left", said Carl, after noticing the deep grooves left in the ground by Bloodscythe and the red silhouette slinking away in the distance, "oh well, I can always catch him later. Miss Makoto, you're well?", he said, pouring a bit of water and shaking the squirrel beastkin to wake her up. "Owww, my head…it was Noel's cooking, wasn't it?", said Makoto upon waking up. "Yeah…Can you help me waking up the others miss Makoto? Miss Noel is fetching water for us.", replied Carl, while waking up Tsubaki.

A chorus of groans, moans and plaints resounded in the restaurant and a file of weary fighters slunk away in the light of the day, using each other as support to get out of this place and wanting nothing more than to never think again of this day and a certain chef culinary talents. Then, after the restaurant's chef's return, Carl and Noel left, Carl wanting nothing more than to erase from his mind the image of Hazama delightfully eating Noel's creation. As for Noel…she was thinking about Hazama's reaction to her cooking and his invitation.

"Hi hi hi", she suddenly giggled. "What's happening?", said Carl, a bit concerned that Noel would laugh after the carnage her cooking brought on their friends. "Nothing!", she said, sporting a bright smile, "We should meet again, for old times sake. Here's my phone number, see you later!". Then she gave Carl her visiting card and left, skipping towards the NOL branch. "See you later…", said Carl, spooked with this day events in general, and Noel's reaction to it all in particular.


The following day at the fourth division of the Praetorian Guard headquarters saw a perky Noel, whose happiness proved to be unbreakable, even in front of an even more moody than usual Jin. At the end of the day, Makoto and Tsubaki caught Noel in the way to her room to discuss her happy mood.

"Noel, I never saw you take so well Jin's remarks. Something happened, a new boyfriend perhaps?", asked Makoto. "No, nothing like that. I just got to know someone who appreciate my cooking.", said Noel, almost floating with happiness. "And who could be the…poor soul in love with your so-called cooking?", asked Tsubaki, still a bit cross that her outing to Orient Town was cut short due to Noel culinary prowess.

"Tsubaki! How can you talk like that?", said Noel, offended by her friend tactlessness. "Noel, your cooking is chemical weaponry! The only one I know who can withstand your cooking is Mai and, from what Cajun told me, the price she pays for that ability is being unable to stomach normal cooking!", said Tsubaki, a bit exasperated with Noel's cluelessness to her cooking's properties.

"No matter, we can have that discussion later…the one we're talking about is captain Hazama. He invited me to the café by Government House tomorrow afternoon!", said Noel, returning to the happy demeanour she had all day.

"I don't like him, you never quite know what he's doing…don't you want one of us to accompany you?", said Makoto, worried about her friend well-being. "No, don't worry about me, I can defend myself. But thanks for the proposition", replied Noel.

"If you say so…Take care though. I would hate to see you hurt.", replied Makoto, doubtful of Hazama's intentions but unwilling to push the matter. "Makoto, if Noel says that she'll be well, I think we can have confidence in her: she's not that much of an airhead.", Tsubaki said, not resisting the temptation to poke fun at Noel. "Hey Tsubaki! Well, I have to leave you, I must prepare for tomorrow. See you later!", said Noel, waving to her friends and going back to her house.


"No man ever invited me to share a drink…is he interested? Is that a date? …No matter, I'll take advantage of that outing, and perhaps…", said Noel, giggling and happily snuggling in her pillows.


"I have a bad vibe thinking about that…Noel, be cautious…", said Makoto, uneasily settling in her bed.


"Please, made that their outing be a date leading to a relationship, made that I get a shot with Jin…", said Tsubaki, kneeling in prayer, "…if all goes well tomorrow, perhaps should I convince Hazama to take Noel as his secretary…". Then, she went to sleep, her mind full of schemes to get Jin's love.


"I hope I'll manage to talk to him, that he won't find me too dull…who are you kidding, he's an intelligence captain, he must have seen all, compared to that my life is as interesting as watching paint dry…and besides I'm always stuttering around men…what made me accept that invitation?", muttered Noel, on her way to Government House's Place, more and more unsure of the her decision with each passing moment. For once, she decided to forgo her usual balmoral cap and to let her hair flow freely. She also decided to ditch her uniform and to wear a skyblue sundress, with a white purse, sapphire blue hair adornments and white sandals to complete her attire.

"I never knew you were so beautiful with your hair down, you should let it out more often, lieutenant Vermillion.", said Hazama, coming up behind Noel in a midnight blue suit, for once without his ever-present hat. "A-ah!", said Noel, startled with his silent arrival, "P-please call me Noel…I hope I'm not late, captain…", she said, bowing her head.

"No, you're just in time. And call me Hazama then. Shall we? The Procope is a marvel, but a lovely lady such as you deserves nothing less.", he said, kissing her hand. "Y-you're sure? I'm not that pretty…nor that interesting…", shyly said Noel, averting her eyes and blushing furiously. "Nonsense! Well, the café awaits us, please follow me, milady.", said Hazama, playfully bowing and leading the way to the Procope. "W-wait for me!", said Noel, snapping out of her thoughts.

Once seated on the Procope's terrace and their order taken, they began to discuss. "Say, do you love cooking?", asked Hazama, once the pleasantries were said and their drinks paid by the captain. "Why yes, I love that!", said Noel. "Then I would like to offer you the post as my aide. Given that I at times forget to eat, absorbed by work, you would have amongst your responsibilities ensuring that I eat, cooking by yourself a lunch if you want.", replied Hazama.

"But someone always end up hurt whenever I cook…", she continued, saddening at the thought. "Well you would cook for me, not for anyone else. And I had no problems after eating your meal two days ago, didn't I?", replied easily Hazama, "I just want you to think about my offer.". "I will…think about it", said Noel, in deep thought, "but don't you work in the Intelligence Department? I'm not the most inconspicuous of people…".

"That wouldn't pose a problem: the post as my aide is mainly an administrative position, as you're accustomed to do with major Kisaragi. The most I might ask of you is to serve as my bodyguard, and you're used to combat missions, aren't you?", answered Hazama. "Y-yes…yes, I guess I am…", replied Noel, dubious of Hazama's statement.

"You should stop second-guessing your abilities like that. You're a very competent soldier", said Hazama, putting on his best reassuring smile and voice. "Y-yeah, I guess…", said Noel, a bit more convinced that time. "Unfortunately, I have to leave. Time flies doesn't it?", said Hazama, standing to leave, "Goodbye Noel and please think about my offer.", he said, bowing and kissing her hand. "…Goodbye…", said Noel, blushing and waving absent-mindedly to the NOL captain.


"What will I do? I like Jin, but he hates me…Makoto doesn't trust Hazama but he seems to appreciate me…what should I do?", Noel asked to herself, while embracing her stuffed panda for reassurance. Then she slipped in an uneasy sleep, full of images of Jin, Hazama and Makoto.


Before leaving, some information on the story: the idea comes from the fact that if I recall correctly it is said that Terumi needs hate to survive. Continuing on that line of thought, Hazama manages to survive (and enjoy) Noel's cooking because her meals embody hate. So, if he doesn't need to spread hate for survival because he has a steady supply of Noel's cooking, would he still be a hate-bringer, hell-bent on the world's destruction, or more of a trickster?

I'll stop that rambling author note, thank you for reading and ask you to please review. Goodbye *bows and exits*