I have no idea what possessed me to make this little... tale, but anyone reads my other story Music Equals Life, I'm sorry, but my laptop has the chapter and I can't get on the internet with it at the moment. So sorry about that.

Disclaimer: The only person I own in this train wreck is Naraku's wife, a.k.a. Mrs. Naraku.

Warning: The following is rated T for domestic violence, physical abuse, and implied but censored cursing.


Setting: It is the present. Somehow, Naraku ended up a full human and is married. Kagura magically ended up his sister. He works a regular 9am to 5pm job. His wife... a nightmare.

"Can't you prepare food correctly?!" she shouted at him before pushing him out of the way to prepare dinner. "What kind of a husband are you?!"

Naraku submissively sat down at the kitchen table and muttered, "You're the woman. You do the cooking."

"What was that honey?" His wife had a butcher knife in her hand and he knew that she was not afraid to use it.

He put an irritated look on his face and said loudly, "I told you already! I love you, damn it!"

Nothing in the entire world could make Naraku feel more like crying than his wife. No one in the entire world would've believed that there was ever a greater evil than Naraku.

Naraku was the vice-principal of a local high school. He lived hundreds of lifestyles so far, as a human he thought he ought to try this lifestyle as it seemed popular. After fighting InuYasha those how-many-hundreds of years ago and not coming to any result, he decided to take it out on these children who were about the same age. Not once did he think that he had to deal with him again.

One day, Naraku was just about to leave the school and go home to his loving wife, when one of the teachers, Kagura, stopped him and said, "Sir, Mr. and Mrs. Higurashi are here to complain about their son."

"Is this the one that was suspended for a week?"

"Yes."

He glanced at the clock. He had planned to leave a little early to go and buy groceries and make dinner himself as a surprise for his wife since she had gone on a trip to visit her parents and was arriving that day. He sighed and said, "Make it quick."

Kagura opened the door and let the parents into the teacher's room. The parents glanced at their door opener with shock before approaching the desk the vice-principal was sitting at.

"What can I help you..." Naraku's voice trailed off as he met the eyes of the parents. He tried to contain his anger as he saw the last person that he had ever expected to see.

'ZOMFG THIS IS THE LAST PERSON I NEED IN MY LIFE!! MY WIFE IS THE ONLY PERSON THAT MATTERS!! MY ENTIRE LIFE IS IN HER HANDS!! I DON'T NEED TO HAVE SOMEONE ELSE PLANNING TO KILL ME AGAIN!!'

Obviously living a human's life changed the way he would usually think or speak. Damn kids and their 'txting' and 'lol-ing'.

Naraku was even too shocked to speak so he just waited until either of the two in front of him did.

"Hey! Naraku long time no see!" a human InuYasha said happily as if they were dormitory buddies or something.

"Kagura, for my wife please buy a large bouquet of her favorite flowers and put it on the table at home."

"Yes, sir."

Kagome gasped. "My goodness, you're married?!"

Naraku sent her a glare and mumbled an angry, "Yes, I'm married. Can we please make this quick? My wife is coming back from a trip tonight."

"I'd like to know why our son was suspended," InuYasha said a little tensely.

"Our students only get in trouble for breaking the rules. Therefore, your son was breaking the rules," Naraku said before getting up quickly and heading for the door. "Thank you very much for your time. If you'll excuse me."

"Our son would never do such a thing as breaking the rules."

"That is just about as true as us not trying to kill each other how many years ago. I'm sorry, but I must get going."

In a hurry, Kagome and InuYasha were invited to have dinner at Naraku's place.

What happened:

"Tell us what kind of rule our son broke!" InuYasha insisted as he and Kagome ended up in a fast-walking chase.

"Just shut up!" Naraku shouted at him. Beads of sweat were rolling down his face as he thought what kinds of things his wife would do to him if he wasn't even home to greet her. "Just- Just... Just follow me and I'll explain everything later!!"

They followed him into a supermarket, where dinner was quickly purchased. Then, it was sprint home as Naraku desperately tried to beat the clock and get dinner prepared.

And that's how Naraku, his wife, InuYasha, and Kagome all ended up eating a quickly-prepared meal in Naraku's home.

"Darling, who are these people?" Naraku's wife asked sweetly as she scooped bowls of rice for everyone, while under the table she was stepping on his foot.

"These are..."

'Oh shit.'

"We're his childhood friends!" Kagome said.

"Way back from the sandbox days!" InuYasha blurted.

"Oh, I see," she said with a big fake smile. After they said their thanks for the meal, she said in between coughs, "Little tramp."

InuYasha and Kagome stared at her in shock as she seemingly kept to herself and ate her food. Naraku sent very exaggerated facial expressions. Never, in any of the times that they have encountered Naraku, was his face so animated.

After dinner, Mr. and Mrs. Naraku walked their guests to the door just like any happy couple would. Right when the door closed behind their honored guests, the REAL Mrs. Naraku came out.

"How DARE you?! You brought guests into our home without even informing me beforehand!" SLAP! Thud!Mrs. Naraku had hit her husband in the face and the shock from it made him fall.

The honored guests weren't even off the doormat yet, so nothing besides the door was really keeping them from hearing anything.

"And WHAT the -BEEP- are THESE THINGS?!" InuYasha and Kagome could hear loud and angry footsteps walk away and then come back. "THE MONEY COULD'VE BEEN USED TO SAVE UP FOR OUR HONEYMOON TO HAWAII!!"

CRASH! Mrs. Naraku had just thrown the flowers and the vase at the already hurt Naraku.

"I bet you banged that chick loads of times! You bastard!"

Before they heard anything they didn't want to- like gunshots, for example- InuYasha and Kagome decided that it was time to leave and they quickly made their way home to their family.

"I love you, you know!" Naraku cried into the night as his wife dragged him by the hair.

Needless to say, Naraku had a very sad life with no one but InuYasha and sometimes Kagura to go to when he was too scared to face his wife.


So, how was it? I'm looking forward to feedback. Thank you for reading!