Miscellaneous Moments

By: bakayaro onna

Summary: These are the short ficlets - some silly, some serious - that do not fit in "The Mattress Manuscripts", with most of them starring Eiri and Shuichi.

Story One: Stupid

Disclaimer: I don't own Gravitation in any way, shape or form.

Thanks: To imayb1 for awesome betaing!


Stupid

A story from Miscellaneous Moments

Word Count: 400
Started: 9/10/07
Completed: 9/28/2009


I know people think I am stupid.

They think me stupid for sticking to your side, even when you verbally abuse me, tell me to go away, or physically push me out of the way.

They do not see what I see.

They do not see how you do not do that anymore. Well, sometimes you still do, but it is more of a knee-jerk reaction or an old habit over anything real. When you lash out at me, I can see your regret instantly flash across your face before your cold mask covers your humanity again.

I know you think I am stupid.

You think me stupid for sticking by your side, for being loyal, for loving to you when you think you are worthless and not worth saving. Or beyond redemption.

You do not see what I see.

Behind your eyes, I see that idealistic young man hiding, that loving caring gentle boy who still lives within you. I want to wrap that boy in bandages and love, stroke his forehead wrinkles away, hand-feed him strawberry pastries, cuddle him tightly and tell him he is cherished, but I know how much you will deny needing any comfort when I confront you.

Sometimes, I know you are being stupid.

It is not stupid for me to stick by your side when the nightmares take you, when brutal memories haunt you, when something seemingly unrelated sets off the alarms in your head... that is when you need me, even though you will snappishly deny it.

This is what I see.

You want to handle it on your own, to be the strong first son, the strong priest, but sometimes it helps to have someone close, to cling to in trust. When I detect you are being overwhelmed again, I make sure I am conveniently nearby, remaining quiet so you think I have not noticed the panicked distress in your eyes or your limbs trembling uncontrollably.

When you crawl into my lap and wrap your arms around my waist or lie down next to me on the sofa and rest your head on my thighs or grab me where I stand and hold me tight against your chest… that is when I know I am not stupid. That is when I know you need me as much as I need you.

And I love it, and you, when you are stupid.