I got this idea last night and even though it's past Christmas I hope you guys like it!

This is Jacob Ray Ely Junior reporting for duty. A couple weeks ago was Christmas, and being the sweet, cute little five year old that I am, I wanted to see Santa Claus. So about midnight I got up, and sneaked down to see if he'd eaten his cookies. What I saw stopped me in my tracks. My mommy was sitting on Santa's lap, and they were eating his cookies!

I thought about going and telling Daddy, who is Jacob Ray Ely Senior. Or so I've been told. . . But I figured I'd get in trouble for being up so late and spying on Santa.

I thought what I'd seen was bad, but what I heard was worse!

So there's my mommy on Santa's lap, and then Santa asks,

"So, Sammy, what do you want for Christmas?" He sounded kinda like my daddy, but I knew he wasn't.

"All I want is you," I couldn't believe my mommy would say something like that to Santa! I thought all she wanted was me and my daddy!

My mommy kissed Santa, and not on the cheek either! Right on the lips. Then Santa chuckled, and kissed her back.

It was awful!

"I think I know something you would want." Said Santa, smiling at Mommy. I was starting to hate Santa more, and more!

"What would I want more than you?" Mommy looked up at Santa, smiling at him. The way she smiles at Daddy.

Doesn't she know that Santa Claus is married?

"You would want a little filly named Sarah,"

"I would?" I think Mommy was confused.

"Yeah."

"And where did this Sarah come from?"

Santa smiled, "She's Tempest's little sister. You know, Blackie's daughter?"

My mommy got this huge smile on his face, and began bouncing up and down on Santa's knee.

"You tryin' to break my leg with your bouncing?" Santa complained.

I wished Mommy would break Santa's leg.

Finally my mommy jumped up, and started dragging Santa Claus to the mistletoe, I saw her kiss him, and that's when I got out of there!

The next week at the New Years party that Grandpa Luke, and Grandma Maxine were having we were asked what we had learned in the past year.

I stood up holding my cup of grape juice, and told everyone what I had found out about Santa Claus.

"I learned that Santa Claus is a cheater, he cheats on Mrs. Claus!"

The room got quiet, and I wondered if that wasn't the kind of stuff a five year old is supposed to be learning, but, I'd already said it.

Grandma Maxine asked me, "What do you mean JJ?" They call me JJ cause I'm Jake Junior.

"I saw Santa and Mommy kissing, but I didn't go tell Daddy because I didn't want to get in trouble for spyin' on Santa! I just wanted to see if he'd come yet!"

Well, my mommy and daddy got funny looks on their faces, and Daddy looked like he was either going to laugh or cry.

Grandpa Luke did laugh, but I didn't know why!

"Grandpa Luke! Don't laugh!"

Mommy started to laugh so hard that she fell back into Daddy's arms, and Daddy started to laugh too.

I'll never know why!

Was it good, bad, could have been better? Too sappy? Too childish? Review and let me know!