A/n here's some more nonsense from my overloaded with DL since Snow Day brain. As always let me know what you think.
Disclaimer: I still don't own them!
Flack turned the corner into Danny and Lindsay's shared office. He saw someone in a white lab coat on their hands and knees under a desk.
"Hey Messer… what ya doing down there."
The person wiggled out and bumped their head on the desk. "Ow, damn it! She struggled awkwardly to her feet and turned on Flack.
"Sorry Lindsay… wrong Messer."
"There's nothing wrong with your eyes is there." She shot back with a look that scared him a little. He tried never to mess with Danny's wife if he could help it.
"Well… what do you expect me to do, everyone in the lab is confused by two detective Messers. Why couldn't you do the liberated female thing and keep your own last name?"
"Gee Flack… last time I looked I don't answer to you."
"That's very cute Linds, but why were you on the floor anyway, aren't you supposed to be takin it easy. In your condition -"
"I'm just fine Flack, and I'll be doing much better once I analyze this evidence, and confirm that my dear husband has taken what belongs to me." She said, and he noticed that she was holding a small green object in her hand.
"Um… I don't think you're goin ta be able to get fingerprints off of that, it's too small." He pointed out and then he winced when she glared at him. Why hadn't he just left the room when he had the chance?
"Oh… I'll find something, so get the hell out of my way Don." He got out of her way and watched her storm down the hallway, or more accurately waddle down the hallway. As a matter of fact, it was pretty funny to watch, but he didn't dare laugh out loud at her retreating back.
It was a good thing he'd wiped the smirk off his face, because she turned back suddenly and pointed at him. "Don't you dare tell Danny I'm coming after his ass, or I'll come after you too."
She turned away and continued on into the lab. He decided to give the both of them a wide berth. Danny was on his own this time.
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Danny, who was blissfully unaware that his lawfully wedded wife was on the warpath, entered the showers in the locker room. He just spent the last three hours dumpster diving for evidence in a murder case. Normally he would sweet talk or bribe his wife into getting into the dirty work, but since Lindsay was on desk duty till the baby was born, he was stuck with Hawkes or Stella as a partner and occasionally Mac.
He turned on the hot water and grabbed the soap. He was going to stay in there as long as it took to get the stench out of his skin. He lathered up and began to sing a little. Having Lindsay in his life was the best thing that had ever happened to him. He couldn't believe how close they'd come to messing it up for good.
Now she was going to have his baby and he couldn't be happier. He didn't even care what they had, boy or girl. Ok… that wasn't true, he secretly wished for a little girl with chocolate eyes and curly brown hair. He wouldn't have admitted this under pain of death; he let Lindsay think he wanted a boy. She'd already told him that she wanted a boy as well.
Regretfully he got out of the water and toweled off. He wrapped the towel around his waist and went to his locker. He was whistling under his breath while he reached for his briefs and his jeans. He was oblivious to the danger near him, which is why he nearly went through the roof when a hand fell on his shoulder.
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Stella walked into the print lab and noticed Lindsay bent over a microscope. That was odd; she was supposed to be on desk duty. She and Mac had gotten into it when he made the mistake of suggesting that she go out on leave when she'd reached her seventh month of pregnancy. Stella had watched the two of them argue, with Danny in the middle of it. He wanted to protect his wife, and she wanted to do her job as she had always done.
After all the shouting in Mac's office had attracted the attention of almost everyone in the lab, Stella had decided to step in. Flack had been impressed that she'd walked into the lions' den but Stella Bonasera wasn't easily intimidated. After more shouting, she'd brought them to a compromise, Lindsay could work till she gave birth, but she had to stay on desk duty.
"Hey Lindsay, what are you doing in here, your supposed to be taking it easy." She was floored when Lindsay turned on her with a very dangerous look on her face. She straightened her shoulders and waded in, Greek temper and all.
"Don't look at me like that Detective Messer; you're not supposed to be in here." She repeated looking her friend straight in the eyes, her hands on her hips.
"I'm processing evidence in a crime. Unfortunately there are no finger prints, it's too small." She held up the same green object Flack had seen in her hand.
Stella held her temper because she thought that Lindsay was either hormonal, or she was a little nuts, either way the older woman decided to humor her younger friend.
"What crime are you talking about Lindsay?"
"What does it look like, I had a whole bag of these on my desk, and while I was gone to the bathroom for the tenth time this morning it disappeared?"
"Are you sure you didn't put it in your desk or -"
The dangerous look in Lindsay's eyes was back with a vengeance at this remark. "No… and besides I already looked there."
Stella was severely taken aback when her friend began to cry. "Ah - Lindsay don't cry I'm sure that we'll find them and then -"
"Don't patronize me Stella, I am not a child."
Stella decided not to share her thoughts on that statement. "So do you have any suspects?"
"Yeah I know who it was, it was Danny." Lindsay sniffed and wiped her eyes with her free hand.
"How do you know that?"
"Well you know how he had that murder scene? Well… Hawkes came in laughing about how Danny had to do dumpster duty today. When I came back from the bathroom, I smelled the garbage, so I know he took them." Her eyes were red and so was her face, she looked like an over ripe tomato, but Stella refused to let herself laugh at her friend.
"Well honey, why don't you just go find him and get them back." Stella said trying to maintain a straight face.
"I have to prove he took them first, otherwise he'll just laugh at me."
"No he won't, now if he's been in the dumpster, he's probably in the shower. Why don't you go down to the locker room?"
Lindsay's eyes lit up and she moved past Stella to the door. "Thanks Stella, you're a good friend."
"Sure but why don't I come with you." She asked in a placating tone she reserved for small children.
"Ok but don't try to stop me, I'm gonna kick his ass."
"I wouldn't dream of it, in fact I'll watch outside in case he tries to run… okay."
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He whirled around at the hand on his shoulder and saw his wife standing there. The look she wore was the same look she got in interrogation with particularly difficult suspect. He swallowed hard and mentally wondered where his balls had gone to after he'd married her.
"Lindsay, did ya come down here ta ogle me or did ya need somethin?"
"Don't play dumb with me Messer, I know you took them."
"Ah - took what beautiful," he asked knowing he was busted, but for Gods sake, couldn't she share just once.
"You know what I mean," she said yanking the purple bag out of his locker. Damn… why hadn't he hidden the evidence better, what kind of CSI was he anyway?
"Look Lindsay I just spent the better part of the afternoon in a dumpster I needed somethin ta get the taste out of my mouth, you know how it gets in one of those things durin the summer."
"That's what your face mask is for," she said pushing her finger into his bare chest. Why did woman have to wear long nails anyway?
"Honey I sorry, but you know how much I like those and -" Was that a whine he heard in his voice? If Flack could hear him now, he'd be laughing his ass off.
"Then get your own Messer, I bought these with my own money." She turned to leave the locker room her restored treats in her hand. "Oh… and Messer for the crime of stealing you wife's dark chocolate M&Ms you get to sleep on the couch tonight… lover boy."
He was relived he'd gotten off so easily with her, but he still didn't understand why she was so mad. He finished getting dressed and left the locker room. Stella met him in the hallway, apparently surprised that Lindsay had left him with his hide intact.
"You're a lucky man Danny, I thought for sure she'd kill you and then I'd have to arrest my friend." She put an arm around his shoulder.
"What's the big deal, it's only candy."
"Danny, let me give you a big piece of advice that you'll heed well if you want to live long enough to see your child go to college. Never… ever… get between a woman and her chocolate!"
A/n I don't own the M&M label so please don't sue.
