Hey people! This is just something I came up with during Math class. Hope y'all like it! Do the disclaimer for me, Sasori-kun!
Sasori: Fine. Author-chan does not own Naruto, the Akatsuki or me.
Chapter One: Sasori
Sasori looked at the door labeled Room 304 and sighed. "Better get it over with," he thought. Sighing once again, he pushed the door open and walked in. Only four other guys were there, and for some reason, they were all wearing matching black jackets with a red cloud design.
The teacher in charge of the Detention Hall wasn't there yet, so he plopped himself down at the very front row, hoping that the others would get the hint. Three of them did; the one with strange pink-and-green eyes continued counting his money, the one with long black hair played with his ponytail while staring into space while the one with green hair seemed to be having an argument with himself.
Unfortunately for Sasori, the seat he'd chosen was only two rows in front of a platinum blonde with his hair slicked back, both feet on his desk and an annoying smirk on his face. "Who's the fresh blood?" he announced loudly. Sasori grimaced. "Mind your own business," he muttered. "Hmph. Your fuckin' loss," the other boy said, turning his attention to the one counting his money.
Sasori stared at the wall clock, waiting for the minute hand to move. And oh, how he hated waiting. Speaking of waiting, why wasn't he here yet? It was his fault he was stuck here. "He should be suffering with me," Sasori thought bitterly.
As the thought ended, the room door burst open with a bang. A long-haired blond boy rushed in, pulling on the strange black jacket with one hand. "Kakashi-sensei is late again? Well, I guess that's fortunate, yeah," he said. Much to Sasori's dismay, the blonde sat down right next to him.
"What did you do this time, Deidara? Lemme guess: you put a fuckin' bomb in the bitches' room again?" the purple-eyed boy asked. Sasori vaguely remembered hearing something about a paint bomb going off in the ladies' bathroom the week before. "Ha ha, very funny Hidan," Deidara said. "Actually, I'm here because of this guy, yeah," he said, jerking his thumb in Sasori's direction.
"Yeah, who the hell is he, anyway?" Hidan hissed. "I ain't never seen him around this fuckin joint before." "He is Akasuna Sasori," the raven-haired boy spoke up, his eyes clasped beneath his chin, his onyx eyes narrowing. "The new kid who maintained his reputation as The New Kid even after three months at this school. Rumor has it he doesn't talk to anybody for any reason, but he's an expert at manipulating people. Some even call him the puppet master." He leaned forward a little. " He's a brilliant student with very high distinctions in art. Personally, I'm curious to know what a person like him is doing in a place like this."
Sasori scowled at him, then smirked. "Actually, I know of you too. Uchiha Itachi, heir to the prestigious Uchiha Security Company. I too wonder what someone like you is doing here."
"Itachi-san got in trouble for being too quiet," a tall blue-haired guy said, plopping into the seat beside Itachi.
"Huh? Kisame, when did you get here?!" Deidara exclaimed. "For being too quiet?" Sasori asked incredulously, despite himself.
"Apparently, one of the teachers here doesn't think highly of my father. So he takes it out on me," Itachi said like it was no big deal. "I feel bad for Sasuke when he comes then, yeah," Deidara said. "No way in hel is that spoiled-ass son of a bitch coming here! He's gonna be shipped off to some preppy boarding school for governors' brats! No offence, Itachi." Itachi nodded. "So back to the big question," Kisame interrupted "Why is the angel-faced redhead here?"
Deidara smirked. "Funny story, yeah," he began. "My oh-so patient art teacher, Kurenai, finally snapped. I had to switch to Anko's art class. I ended up being paired with Sasori no Danna over there for a group project." Sasori scowled. Deidara was mocking him with that Danna (Master) title.
"Anyway, he and I had opposing…views on art, yeah," Deidara burst into laughter. "Can you believe it? He thinks art should last forever!" "Fuckin' hilarious," Hidan said dryly. Realizing that no one got his point, Deidara cleared his throat and continued. "Well, Anko-sensei isn't as patient as others, yeah. We got into an argument and got matching detention slips as a reward, yeah."
"Artists. I never did understand them," the boy who'd been counting money since Sasori came in finally said. Even sitting down, Sasori could tell that he was tall, although Kisame was at least 4 inches taller. "Why are you here this time?" Kisame asked. Hidan burst out laughing. "He tried to convince Nurse Tsunade to bet on when she'd get married!" he cackled. "Shut up," Kakuzu said.
"Hidan painted himself black and white and scared the living daylights out of the teachers in the teachers' lounge with fake blood and a three-spiked scythe," Kakuzu put in. Hidan laughed harder. "You shoulda seen the looks on their faces! It was fucking hilarious! I think Iruka actually crapped his pants!" That got everyone else laughing. Sasori hid a smile.
"What about you, Kisame?" the green-haired boy at the back spoke for the first time. "That's Zetsu," Deidara told Sasori. "I don't wanna know," Zetsu said, his voice suddenly deeper. "He has bipolar issues," Deidara clarified. Kisame grinned, revealing rows of razor-sharp teeth. "I brought Samehada to school," he said. "Samehada?" Sasori echoed. "His mutant fish…pet…sword…thingy," Deidara explained, adding his usual 'yeah' at the end of the statement.
"Do you guys wanna know what I did?" Zetsu asked. "No wait, its none of your business," he added. "I know you," Sasori said, surprising himself. "You're in my Spanish class. You got in trouble for first complimenting the teacher, then insulting her." "Sounds like the Zetsu I know," Kisame grinned. "Wanna bet he'll be here tomorrow for the same reason?" Kakuzu asked eagerly. "Fuck no!" Hidan snapped.
Just then, the door burst open and three more people stomped in. "Sorry, Tobi is late! But Tobi is a good boy! So Tobi will not do it again!" the one wearing an orange mask cried as he ran towards Deidara and tried to hug him. "Let go of me, you trigger happy idiot, yeah!" Deidara snapped. "But Tobi is a good boy!" Tobi whined, sitting besides Deidara obediently. "Then why are you in detention?" Sasori asked, bewildered at how stupid someone could be.
Tobi paused. "That is a very good question. Tobi will get back to you when Tobi has the answer."
Deidara face-palmed. Itachi rolled his onyx eyes. "Idiot," Zetsu said, and for once, his two sides seemed to agree.
"Well, nice to see you too!" an angry voice said from the back of the class. "Oh look, our pierced leader decided to fucking join us!" Hidan said, smirking. "I got in trouble for having too many piercings!" he fumed. "I get it for me, but Konan too?" he said, ggesturing to the blue-haired girl sitting beside him. Sasori looked closely at her. The only visible piercing he saw was a lip ring.
"She probably didn't really get detention," Deidara whispered. "She follows Pain everywhere, yeah." Both Pain and Konan wore the same black jackets as the rest of them. Pain noticed Sasori for the first time. "Who's the new kid?" he asked.
Deidara put an arm around Sasori. "My new partner!" he announced triumphantly. "But Deidara is Tobi's partner!" Tobi whined. "Well, I'm ditchin' ya, yeah," Deidara said. "You can be my partner," Zetsu offered. "Wait, no you can't!"
"A new member, huh?" Pain said thoughtfully. "Well we do have an empty spot now that Orochimaru is gone." "Wait. Member of what?" Sasori asked suspiciously. "The Akatsuki," Kisame said. "We even have matching jackets!" Deidara grinned. (A/N: Way to point out the obvious, Deidara.)
Sasori was elated. This was the first time anyone had invited him to join anything. Even back in Suna, he was an outcast. Remembering that, his mood fell. "You don't want me in your group," he said darkly. "Why not?" Deidara asked. "Because…I'm different," Sasori said. "I'm cold and emotionless…like a puppet! People don't want to be near me. You don't want to be near me."
It was a curse that followed him from childhood: he couldn't process emotions. And when his parents died, he decided to abandon his emotions completely. All they ever brought was pain.
To his surprise, they laughed. Every single one of them, even Itachi. "So you're misunderstood. Been there, done that," Kisame said ligtly. "We all are," Konan said kindly. "Yeah," Deidara said. "Haven't you noticed? Basically, Zetsu is actually two people; Tobi is missing a few-okay, a gazillion- brain cells; Kisame is a mutant fish; Kakuzu is covered in stitches; Hidan has the Tourette's Syndrome-" "I do NOT!" Hidan objected. "…Even I'm strange in a way," Deidara finished.
"What about Itachi?" Sasori asked, not convinced. "He's expected to be a prince all the time, when in reality, he's one of us. It's strange to hiss folks, yeah," Deidara shrugged.
"Our differences make us one," Pain said. "So the world turned its back on us. So what? We turn our backs on the world, and receive a paycheck for letting them see our expensive backs!" Kakuzu said.
"You may not belong to others. But not to us," Itachi said quietly. "So…you in?" Deidara asked hopefully. Sasori allowed himself to smile. "That was some speech. I'm sure you guys planned it beforehand, but sure, why not?"
"Great, yeah!" Deidara cheered. "I still don't appreciate that crack about the Tourette's Syndrome," Hidan muttered. "I can have your jacket ready by tomorrow," Konan said, appearing besides Sasori with a measuring tape.
"Hey kids! Sorry I'm late! I was saving a basket of kittens from a waterfall," a silver-haired teacher said as he strolled in, rubbing the back of his head and laughing nervously. "Yeah right, Kakashi-sensei," Deidara muttered sarcastically. "Oh! We have a newcomer!" the teacher said, noticing Sasori. "Well I hope I won't be seeing you here again. I'm sure one of these rascals got you in trouble." Sasori kept quiet like a model student and Kakashi settled down on the teacher's desk, soon getting lost in his Icha Icha novel.
Deidara and Sasori looked at each other and shared a secret smile. "Haha, angel face," Deidara teased. "Brat," Sasori scowled.
He had finally found a place where he belonged.
Awww! That was soooo touching! (Wipes away invisible tear) Way to get out of that shell, Sasori! Also, a whooping 1774 words! AWESOME!
Thanks so much for reading you guys! I hope you had as much fun reading it as I did writing (uh…typing) it. Please review! I'd love to hear from you guys. Oh, and stay tuned!
*NOTE: Although it's not completely accurate, 'yeah' is a rough English meaning for 'un', which Deidara adds at the end of all his sentences.
