A/N: You need to read the whole fic for it to make sense. Italics are flashbacks, yes. It will all make sense once you finish, promise. :)
This oneshot is dedicated to phantasmagoric waltz, or Sabrina ;) You're amazing.
One Step, Two Steps
One step, two steps, three steps.
Dawn walks over the bridge easily but her feet seem to slow down, wanting to go back. Too many memories lurk here, too many thoughts rush through her mind, but she knows she has to do this. No friends, not even any of her trusted pokémon. Walking all by herself, hands clutched together primly, looking for all the world as if she is simply taking an evening stroll.
As if.
She takes the final shaky steps of the bridge and reaches the small secluded area few know about. Taking a deep breath, she adjusts her skirt and fixes her hair before swallowing. She keeps her head bowed, not looking up.
"Thank you for coming, Paul," she begins her speech, sounding well rehearsed. "I-I just wanted to tell you a few things. I'm not sure how you'll take them but even so, it means so much that you even took the time to come here. I'll get straight to the point; I know that's how you like to do things. I like you Paul, I really like you."
-.-
She takes the final shaky steps of the bridge and reaches the small secluded area few know about. Taking a deep breath, she adjusts her skirt and fixes her hair before swallowing. She keeps her head bowed, not looking up.
"Thank you for coming, Paul," she begins her speech, sounding well rehearsed. "I-I just wanted to tell you a few things. I'm not sure how you'll take them but even so, it means so much that you even took the time to come here. I'll get straight to the point; I know that's how you like to do things. I like you Paul, I really like you."
"Hnh." His small noise makes her look up. His expression is as stoic as usual but his eyes are different. "You like me?"
"Yes," she says, struggling to keep her voice clear. Dawn has promised herself that she'll keep her dignity today, whatever may occur.
"I suppose I like you too, troublesome girl." Dawn's eyes flew up to meet his, her lips parting in shock.
"R-really?"
"Yeah." For the briefest moment, so quickly that it could've been a dream, a smile plays upon his lips but then it's gone.
"Can I hug you?" Dawn is surprised to find her voice is timid. What a messed up couple they are. Isn't it the guy making the first move in all those romance novels that her mother reads?
"If it makes you happy," he says. Dawn's entire face lights up and she beams, twirling forward to envelope him in her arms. He doesn't hug back at first, not until Dawn reaches to grasp his arms and he pulls them away with an annoyed sound.
"I know how to hug," he mutters gruffly, pulling her into a stiff embrace. She giggles, thankful he can't see her blushing face and snuggles into his firm chest.
It's bliss.
-.-
Dawn forces her blue eyes to travel upwards and they land upon the smooth grey tombstone. With a gasp she falls by it and her eyes travel across the unmistakable words. "Paul…" she mumbles as she struggles to decipher it, for they don't mean Paul right?
Her Paul?
Her Paul isn't dead, don't be silly, her Paul is fine and well and where is he? Dawn spins, horrified eyes growing larger as she looks for him. Where is he? Nonononono, nothing is wrong with him. Her Paul is right there, about to hug her, except she can't see him. He must be hiding, silly Paul, why does he play these games?
Paul, you can come out now. Dawn's fist clench at her sides, and she feels her throat grow chalky. She's figured out the game, why doesn't he come out? Why is he hiding? Paul, stop hiding, this isn't funny. She's getting really scared now and she screams his name, voice hoarse with the raw fear she feels.
-.-
"I'm glad we came out here for a picnic," Dawn giggled as she set out the food, handing him a sandwich she had made that very morning.
"I don't like strawberry jam," Paul comments, as he studies the sandwich. Dawn pouts and hands over her own sandwich, since it has grape jelly instead.
"Nah, it's fine," he decides upon seeing her face, though he's careful not to let any emotion appear on his own face. It's not like he really minds the food they eat. He knows that Dawn woke up early to make so many foods, though they truthfully aren't very good, and the fact that the loves him enough to try is enough.
Huh.
In an uncharacteristic show of emotion, Paul slung his arm over Dawn's shoulder and pulled her close, letting her rest her head upon his shoulder. He doesn't stroke her hair or cuddle with her, though he knows that's what most girls would have wanted. Dawn understands he can't really show his emotions the same ways as other people and a small gesture most people would have looked over hides deep meaning for him. She's learned to adjust to his ways and he to hers.
-.-
Dawn sobs now. Where is Paul? Why did he die? Why did he leave her? She falls to the ground, curling up, and cries and cries and cries. Her blue hair falls around her face and she thrashes upon the ground. Where is Paul? She wants him, now, by her side. This isn't supposed to happen.
He's so beautiful, with long hair and dark eyes that capture his soul. Dark eyes that shine and sparkle and…she'll never see those eyes again. Nobody could take away her Paul. She just must be not looking in the right places. Where is he? Paul, Paul, come out please. This isn't funny. It hurts to breath. The tears don't stop. The memories don't stop.
Paul, please.
-.-
"Paul, look at me," her voice is frightened and she clings to his hands as they grasp hers. He looks weary but struggles to keep his eyes open, fixed upon her face, her beautiful face, wet with tears. It's not that big of a deal, he tries to think, though doctors bustling around him tell him differently. A rock, just a rock, that's not enough to kill him. Even though it hurts a lot…he has to live. He's still young. He has places to go, things to do, Dawn to love.
He still hasn't told Dawn he loves her.
"Don't worry troublesome girl," he made out. "I'm not going anywhere." He smirked but was cut off with a gasp of pain. Damn it, he's not going to die! He's not!
"Dawn-"His fingers threaten to slip from hers but she grasps them tighter, holding them fiercely within her vice grip. She stares at him with wide eyes, shaking her head. A Nurse Joy tries to pull Dawn away but the normally sweet bluenette responds with such force that the nurse decides it's better to leave her be.
"Paul, don't leave me," she begs, and he swallows thickly.
"I won't," he promises, though he doesn't know if he can uphold his promise. "I love you."
.
"NO!" An anguished shout tore from Dawn's lips as she fell upon Paul's body. "Wake up!" she screamed hysterically. Two nurses rushed to suppress her but she flailed wildly, kicking them away. "You said you wouldn't leave me!" She screamed, words barely distinguishable between her harsh wailing. "WAKE UP!"
"Sedate her," a doctor orders firmly and a Nurse Joy approaches her with the syringe in her hand, though her face was apologetic. Dawn pushes her away, falling over Paul's body and bawling with every last piece of sanity within her. The pain tears her apart and she struggles to breath but she doesn't care. She vaguely feels the sharp sting of the syringe sinking into her arm but ignored it.
"I LOVE YOU PAUL! I LOVE YOU!"
-.-
"Dawn, there you are!" A relieved voice rings out but Dawn doesn't look to see who it is. May…Misty…Ash…Brock…? Does it matter? If they aren't going to make her Paul come out from wherever he is, she doesn't care. Arms wrap around her and struggle to pull her up but she refuses to budge from her position of hugging the tombstone.
The person looks at her, strands of fiery hair falling around her face. Who has hair like that? Misty? It's very pretty, but Paul's hair is prettier. Yes, this must be Misty, this girl has large blue eyes and pale skin. Dawn reaches out to push away the red locks from the girl's face.
"Where's Paul?" she asks and Misty takes a deep breath though her face is anything but exasperated.
"He's right here, Dawn."
Dawn? Is she talking to her? Her name is Troublesome…no, wait, only Paul calls her that. Paul called her Dawn once though, when he said he loved her. Does Misty know that? Is that why she is calling her Dawn?
"Paul loves me," she announces. Misty smiles, though sadness is clear in her eyes. "I want to see him. Make him come out, Misty. I want to see him."
"Dawn…Paul is dead."
Dawn stares at the girl for a second before pushing her away. What is she saying? Why is Misty playing the same game as Paul? They are so cruel. How could they dream of such a cruel trick?
"He's not," she tells her. "Where is he?"
Misty takes a shaky breath and reaches out to brush the tombstone with wavering fingers. "He's right here." Dawn follows her gaze.
"Don't be stupid, Misty," she snaps, her voice fierce. "This isn't my Paul."
Misty places her hands on the younger girl's shoulders. "Then why are you crying?"
Dawn reaches up to feel her cheeks, surprised when she feels the wetness under her fingers. Why is she crying? Paul…Paul…Paul…
Paul is dead.
"You promised you wouldn't leave me!" She sobs at the sudden realization. "COME BACK, PAUL! I WANT YOU! COME BACK! YOU PROMISED! YOU CAN'T LIE! COME BACK!"
More arms pull her away and she kicks and flails as they drag her to the nearest center, where a Nurse Joy forces her into bed and pulls the covers up. Dawn doesn't stop crying. They're lying aren't they? Where's her Paul? Where is he? He lied to her, how could he lie to her? Why did he promise her? Why isn't he coming back? She screams, her anguish tearing through the sobs that wrack her body.
"I WANT PAUL! I LOVE YOU PAUL! COME BACK, PLEASE!"
She dreams of him, but his eyes are sad in this dream. He's crying, and Paul never cries. When she tries to reach out and touch him, he disappears, fading slowly into nothingness, out of her reach, away…away…away.
In the morning, Dawn wakes up. She leaves the center easily, and makes her way across the familiar path. One step, two steps, three steps. Her heart pounds and when she reaches that special place, she stands nervously, locking eyes with the ground.
"Thank you for coming, Paul," she begins her speech, breath shaky and fingers clenched at her sides. "I-I just wanted to tell you a few things."
-.-
A/N: Before you ask, yes, Dawn went insane. Whether she ever recovers is up to you.
