"Will You Crawl, Too?"
A/N: Inspired by Superchick's song "Crawl (Carry Me Through)". A reminder to us that even when we have to crawl Divinity is always there with us. All lines marked with an * are directly from The Return of the King.
Fear
The air in the tower of Cirith Ungol was cold, even though the land it was hot and oppressive. It was laden with the heavy stench of decay and death, choking and terrible, from the terrible massacre the Orcs had driven themselves to. Standing alone waiting for Sam to return, Frodo could sense the Darkness of Mordor and felt his fear returning with choking intensity. It was so far from the Mountain, so very far… how could they ever hope to make it there? It was only the two of them, him and Sam facing this Dark journey and the Dark Lord himself.
Of course, came the familiar voice that he had grown to detest. Of course it is all so very hopeless, my foolish one. But you may find rest if you give yourself up and all this. How could it be that a Thing of Evil have such a honeyed tongue? Perhaps others believed that the One Ring spoke harshly with tones of plain ill-will, but Frodo had discovered that It spoke fairly, wheedling Its way into your soul, almost gentle at times, striving to win its bearer's whole being through sweet promises that in reality stood empty and altogether damning.
Frodo hoped that Sam would return soon, because he knew his time and his strength was running low.
Despair
He had run out of hope so long ago, he couldn't recall exactly when. It was as he had told Sam there in the tower. The whole thing is quite hopeless, so it's no good worrying about tomorrow. It probably won't come.* And so he had been proven right about the former, for here he and Sam stood, at a dead end, with nowhere to go but back. After all their travel! They had come no closer to the Mountain, even their several marches, and he could feel himself tiring. The Ring was gaining hold, becoming more powerful and heavier with every step, sneering at his attempts to ignore It.
Sam insisted on taking the road, where the chances of discovery were terribly high, but Frodo almost couldn't bring himself to care. He had become so mired in despair of his task that he could not see any way for it to succeed. He envied his friend's hope and almost scorned his naiveté, but found he still drew strength from Sam's sturdy presence. Let Sam have hope enough for both of them.
"All right, Sam," he said now to Sam's suggestion. "Lead me! As long as you've got hope left. Mine is gone…"*
Prayer
Exhaustion. Pain. Despair. That was all he knew, all he could ever recall. In place of his memories there was soul-shattering Darkness that laughed at him, even as his will fought on. His body no longer could. It had fallen to Sam to carry him up the side of the Mountain, and his heart wept for his friend even if his eyes could not, for Sam was clearly just as hurt and exhausted as Frodo himself was and yet was willing to use the last of his strength to help his master.
But now they had a respite, one final rest before life failed. Frodo knew Sam had lost his own hope several miles back, but had continued on, leading Frodo every step of the way. What had he done to deserve such a faithful companion in life?
The sky lightened above them, illuminating the murky clouds as if in a siren's call, and Frodo felt finally the certainty that this was the deciding moment—the last gasp. Sam had felt it as well, and struggled up to his feet, but unlike so many times before Frodo did not need his faithful friend to rouse him from blank exhaustion.
"I'll crawl, Sam," he managed to tell him, and for the moment Sam seemed content to listen. Looking up the long steep slope of the Mountain, Frodo felt despair overwhelm him again, realizing how much farther they had yet to go, but as if in answer his will surged with the last of his strength, and he realized that perhaps he was not alone in this hidden forte. The Ring taunted him, fully showing Itself for what It was, and even closing his eyes did not allow him a lull from Its golden band of Fire. But his will held, and with his eyes still closed, he prayed to the One he knew was somehow with him.
'O Eru, if I must crawl the way, will you crawl, too?'
