Disclaimer: Don't own the characters. Wish I did, but don't.

Warnings: Hidan's beautiful mouth for now. Yaoi to come :D

A/N: This is my first fanfic ever…Please don't kill me for the horribleness. Let me know if you see problems PLEASE tell me. I'll be happy if you do! :D So, enjoy the first chapter!

A/N 2: 'Bwahahaha!' –this indicates thoughts

"Lalalalala," –this indicates speech


HIDAN**

'Well, fuck this,' Hidan thought with a sour tone. This moment in time saw him sitting in a car with his social worker. They were on their way to some rinky-dink town in Alabama. 'What a fucking joy to see a bunch of right-wing, hicks EVERYWHERE!'

Hidan is a foster child, currently on his way to a new foster home. His last "parents" didn't like his attitude.

Hidan chuckled in the backseat, remembering his last words to the Johansons. He told them to "fuck themselves on a pike and let Jashin deal with the rest."

His social worker looked at him through the mirror, "You okay back there? Whatcha laughin' at?"

Hidan chuckled again and turned to look at the blue-haired woman, "I was just thinking about the last think I told my last "parents." It made me smile…The looks on their faces, that is."

"So it's safe to say you left your mark in their minds?"

"Just a bit," Hidan said with a smirk. He then shifted to lay across the backseat, "I'm going to sleep for a bit. Can you wake me up when we get to where ever?"

"Sure, it'll be a few hours though," the woman said, turning her attention back to the road, "You sure you don't want me to wake you up sooner to experience the wonders of Blueridge Hills, Alabama?" Upon getting no response, Konan looked in the mirror again to find the young zealot fast asleep.

"BREAK CHECK!"

THUD.

"OW, FUCK! THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?" Hidan yelled, getting out of the car.

"Waking you up. We're here," Konan said while popping the trunk to get Hidan's things.

"Well you didn't have to give me fucking brain damage. Jashin, that fucking hurt!"

"Watch your mouth," Konan grabbed the younger boy's bag and threw it to him from the trunk.

THUD.

"What the fuck, Konan? You're trying to kill me!" Hidan yelled in a whiny tone while nursing the bump on the back of his head.
"I said watch your mouth. You're about to meet the boys."

"The...boys?" Hidan asked wide-eyed, "You never said anything about other boys, Konan. YOU KNOW MY ISSUE WITH THAT!" Panic was evident in his voice.

"Well, you'll have to deal with it now, won't you, Hidan?" Konan asked as she walked up the sidewalk to the large red door. As an afterthought, she turned back to look at Hidan. "Just try not to, you know…rape or sacrifice them…You should do fine."

"Grrrrrr." Hidan's left eye started twitching at the retreating blue hair. "I hate you so much."

KAKUZU**

"Why do you and Konan keep bringing boys here? It's not like you gain more room every time you do," Kakuzu drawled as he watched the black car pull up and stop abruptly.

"-The hell was that for?"

"Dammit, Pein," Kakuzu sighed as he stared wide-eyed out of the window, "Why the hell do you always bring home whiny brats?"

"Well, he's been bounced around quite a bit. Before that he even lived on the streets for a while." Pein stated while watching the blue-haired woman toss a suitcase at the young boy's head. He couldn't hear the next words out of his mouth, but he knew they weren't nice.

Kakuzu stood there for a couple more minutes to watch the new boy from the window. He was very interesting looking. Silver hair, slicked straight back, a small, lithe body that was barely covered by his mesh shirt and tight red pants. The boy also had an odd, black beret with an upside-down triangle inside of a circle, stitched in red.

He listened carefully to the next exchange between the woman and young boy.

"-You're about to meet the boys."

Kakuzu watched the other boy's face. It suddenly dropped into a look of horror. His next words were mumbled followed shortly by a very audible, "YOU KNOW MY ISSUE WITH THAT!"

'He has an issue with something? Good. Maybe he'll leave and I can keep my room to myself,' he thought while strutting back into the living room with Pein and the other boys, his hands stuffed into his pockets.

"We're in luck," Kakuzu stated sarcastically as he entered the room, "We got ourselves another whiner."
"OOH! Maybe Tobi will have a new friend!" You guessed it. Tobi bounded in from the kitchen with a plate full of fish sticks.

"Who the hell keeps buying those for him?" yelled Kisame, trying to grab the grinning Tobi.

"Don't worry about it," Itachi came in at this point, pushing gently against Kisame's chest, "It's only Tobi."

"What's wrong Kisame?" Tobi asked innocently, "Tobi thought you liked fish sticks."

HIDAN**

"I'M GOING TO KILL THAT LITTLE BRAT!"

Hidan stepped through the front door to see three boys and a girl holding back some blue-haired kid from a maniacally laughing…kid?...with an odd hoodie that zipped up to hide all but his left eye. The kid was obviously laughing. A fourth boy stood back with his arms crossed over his chest and an unamused look in his eyes. That was the only part he could see though. The rest was covered by a dark grey beanie and a black mask.

"Tobi loves -giggle- getting you riled up -snort- Kisame-kun!"

"TOBI, I'LL KILL YOU!"

"But Tobi's such a good boy!"

Hidan looked over to see Konan sigh and mumble to herself. The only part he caught was a soft "Not again" before he looked at the scene before him. A sharp whistle caused him to jump and return his attention to Konan.

"Boys!" Then like magic, everything froze. Everyone, including Pein, turned to look at the blue-haired woman. The boys quickly released each other and formed a small line with Konan and Hidan in front of them and Pein behind them.

"Now then," Konan stated softly this time, "Boys, this is Hidan," she gestured to the boy, "He's the new addition to our little family."

"Weeee! Tobi has a new friend!"

"Uhhhh..." Hidan looked awkwardly down at the boy clinging to his arm.

"Don't mind him," spoke a boy to the far right. Hidan looked at him curiously. It was the boy with the grey beanie. As he looked more, Hidan could see a thick, black stitch mark across the bottom above the boy's left eye. The mask he wore also came up to hide everything but his two, bright green eyes. The only other thing Hidan could tell about him was he was very tan, from what he could see of his face and arms, and the few strands of hair that hung over his forehead were black as night.

"Yeah, un. He just has a chronic case of idiot, un," Hidan looked over to realize that the one he previously thought was a girl…was actually a boy. 'Holy shit...It's a boy?'

THUMP.

"Konan! I swear to Jashin!" Hidan yelled, "You are seriously trying to kill me! Either that or turn me into a brain dead vegetable!"

"If you would watch your mouth I wouldn't hit you in the head. Or anywhere for that matter," Konan said with her hands on her hips.

Hidan raised his hands in the air and stared at Konan in disbelief for a second. "I didn't even say anything this time!"

"Yeah, you did, un," the blonde boy said softly, his head hanging low and his eyes downcast. He then directed his gaze to Hidan. "And yes, un. I am a boy, un."

"Ohhhhhh. Shi-oot. I'm sorry." Hidan looked at the floor with a tinge of pink across his cheeks.

"Don't worry," the red-head next to the blonde spoke up, "We all thought he was a girl at first, too."

"Danna, un!"

"What?" the red-head shrugged, "We did." The other boys in the room nodded quickly in agreement. The blonde boy huffed and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Alright boys, how 'bout some intros so Hidan doesn't die of embarrassment?" Pein said from the wall he was currently leaning on. Hidan blushed a little more at this suggestion.

"I'm Deidara, un," the blonde smiled and waved. He was a little shorter than Hidan, maybe 5'8" or so, with bright blonde hair half up in a high ponytail and bangs that completely covered the left side of his face. The red bandana helped hold the rest of his hair back as well as flip the bangs over his face. He looked like the artsy-type, what with the bright green shirt with the Rolling Stones' signature tongue and the light wash jeans with paint splatters across them. From his wave, Hidan could also see a red, black, and white cloud on his right palm. Whether it was drawn on or a tattoo, or whether it was on the other hand as well, was a mystery to him.

"Also," Pein interrupted his thoughts, "tell him a little fact about yourself. So he can start to get to know you."

Deidara looked back at Hidan and smiled again, "Well, un. I like art, un…Yeah. Art's a bang, un." He gave a weird little smirk and went to sit on a small, red couch.

The red-head that stood next to him followed after with a small wave of his own, "Sasori. I like wood." He then plopped next to Deidara and placed his right arm over the boy's shoulder.

Hidan looked between the two with interest. 'So, I guess it's safe to say that they're a couple,' Hidan thought with a sigh of relief. "They accept gays apparently. Sweet Jashin, thank you.'

Sasori was about the same height as Deidara, give or take about a half inch. He was wearing some baggy, black pants with chains hanging everywhere and a plain black wife beater. Hidan had seen the pants at Hot Topic. He even had a few pairs of his own. Another thing he noticed was the same red cloud on each finger tip of Sasori's right hand. As Sasori relaxed a little more, Hidan could see that it was the same on the other hand, as well. 'Maybe it's something between the two of them.'

"Yo. The name's Kisame. I'll eat anything but fish." This was the blue-haired kid from earlier.

Tobi then leapt from his place in the small line to the center of the room. "Fish are friends! Not food!" He then giggled and ran to safety behind Pein.

"Tobi, no one likes you and you're adopted!" Kisame shouted at the small, laughing boy.

"Good conclusion, genius," the masked boy stated sarcastically. The entire room burst into laughter.

"Shut up, Stitchy! You know I hate it when he quotes that stupid movie." Kisame moved to the opposite side of the room as Tobi and leaned against the wall there.

"Call me Stitchy again and it won't be the only thing you hate, fish breath."

'Stitchy? I wonder why he called him that...What exactly is he hiding?' Hidan thought while looking at the masked boy again. 'Stitchy' noticed and stared back, causing Hidan to blush again and look at the floor. No one else seemed to notice.

When Hidan looked back at Kisame he noticed something again. That same cloud. Well, two of them. One on either side of Kisame's neck. The rest of the boy was quite average. He had a clearly toned body. Hidan could tell this even through the black and blue hoodie and baggy jeans. He was also fairly tall. Hidan stood at about 5'11" and Kisame definitely towered over him. 'He's probably like 6'5"' Hidan mused.

Just then a smaller, lithe figure walked over and wrapped himself around Kisame's waist. 'Ok...So maybe I just entered gay world..?'

"My name is Itachi," he said evenly, still wrapped around Kisame. "Hn. I don't really like anything except for this guy." To emphasize his point, he nuzzled closer to the tall boy, if that was even possible.

Itachi had long, black hair that was pulled back into a low ponytail. A few strands still hung loose and framed his thin face. Also framed by the strands of hair were dark, black eyes, covered by small, black, square-rimmed glasses. Lines under his eyes suggested that he hadn't slept properly in a while. His mood (or lack there of) suggested the same. His slender neck was hidden by a dark blue, probably navy, high-collard shirt. He was also wearing some snug fitting, black slacks. Hidan's gaze must have lingered there a bit too long because when he looked back up, he met a fiery glare from Kisame. He shuddered slightly until the next ball of energy bounded up.

"I'm Tobi! And Tobi likes everything 'cuz Tobi's a good boy!"

Tobi was definitely younger than the other boys. He stood at 5'4". Maybe. The hoodie he was wearing was something else Hidan had seen at Hot Topic. It zipped all the way to the top of the hoodie and turned into a mask with holes to see out of. He owned one of those as well. His, of course, was a Star Wars Storm Trooper, though. Tobi's was black and the 'mask', so to say, was an orange swirl pattern with only the right eye visible.

Suddenly, Tobi sprinted toward the small, red couch Deidara and Sasori were sitting on with cat-like speed.

"Deidara-senpai!" Tobi screeched loudly. Upon hearing this, Sasori stood up and quickly intercepted the masked ball of energy with one hand.

"Tobi, if you touch him, I will make you into one of my puppets and force you to perform for the old people." Tobi looked at him with what Hidan could only interpret as horror.

"But...Tobi doesn't like the old people! They're all boring!"

Sasori let the boy go and took his seat again. "Then I suggest you not touch him, Tobi," he said with a short glance back at Tobi.

"Ok, Tobi's a good boy." Tobi then slid down to a sitting position on the floor where he rocked back and forth in the fetal position.

The next boy looked like he would much rather eat Hidan than talk to him. He was the second tallest guy in the room, right behind Kisame, standing at about 6'3" or 6'4". The way he did his make-up (yes. make-up), it looked like half his face and neck was black while the other half looked like a sickly pale, almost white. And he had green hair. 'Who the hell gets green hair?' Hidan asked himself. He hated the color green. As he continued looking over the guy, Hidan couldn't help but notice the way the guy's clothes reflected his head. The long trench coat was white on the left and black on the right. The tall collar that stood up behind his head was green...and spiky. 'He looks like a giant Venus Fly Trap...'

A low, booming voice dragged Hidan from his thoughts, "I am Zetsu. I like plants." The boy's face was completely blank as he said this. 'So maybe that was his intention to look like a big plant...' Hidan thought with a confused look on his face.

Hidan's gaze then shifted to the last boy to introduce himself. He had a bored look in his eyes, but as soon as his gaze locked with Hidan's, there seemed to be a look of interest. Hidan looked back and made it obvious when he looked him over. This boy wasn't much taller than himself from what Hidan could tell. 6'2" at the most. And every inch of that had toned muscle to go with it. He was wearing a black, waffle knit, long-sleeve shirt and some ratty old baggy jeans. The sleeves of the shirt were pulled up just above his wrists to reveal two, thick, dark stripes across each forearm. It looked pretty cool on the boy's tan skin.

Everyone watched the boys stare at each other. A few muffled chuckles could be heard. Finally, Kisame decided to break the silence, "Yo, Stitchy. You gonna introduce yourself or just keep staring at Hidan like he's a piece of meat?"

Hidan watched the boy's eyes change. It wasn't noticeable to anyone else apparently, but Hidan could see it. They squinted a little bit, probably in anger. Without removing his eyes from Hidan's, he flipped Kisame off and responded, "Kisame, if you call me that one more time you're going to have to look like me. And since you apparently don't like that too much, I suggest you not call me that again." He glanced back at Kisame and glared before returning his gaze to Hidan. Hidan looked back curiously for a second. 'Look like him? Is that a bad thing? He looks fine to me…'

"My name is Kakuzu. I guess I like sewing. And if you think you're a smart ass like Fishy over there, then call me Stitchy. You'll learn fairly quickly how I feel about it."

"That's good, Kakuzu. Watch your language," Konan said softly. She put her hand on Hidan's shoulder and pat it softly. "Now, Kakuzu over there is going to be your roommate, Hidan."

Hidan's face fell. He could feel it. "Room...Roommate?" He turned his wide-eyed stare to Konan's face. Then, in a soft tone only the two of them could hear, "Konan, are you crazy? I think he might end up killing me! And you know my fucking issue!"

Konan took her hand and put it to the back of his head with enough force to jostle it for a minute. "I said watch your language, Hidan. It's only going to get worse each time. And you can deal with your issue. All the others have."

Hidan looked back at the others and quickly glared back at Konan. "That's not the only issue I'm worried about, Konan. And Kakuzu looks like he would rather beat me into a wall."

Konan pulled him sharply into the kitchen. "Hidan. You cannot do any rituals in this house. You must be out of your mind to even think of it!"

"YOU must be out of YOUR mind if you think I'm going to go without my rituals to Jashin-sama!"

"Hidan. We'll talk about this later. Until then: No. Rituals."

Hidan huffed and stomped back into the living room with the others. They all looked at him curiously. He just walked past them and out the front door.

'If that bitch thinks I'm going to do without sacrificing to Jashin, she needs to get her head straight.' Hidan roughly yanked his mesh shirt off and threw it to the ground, pulling out the knife he had stashed in his pocket. As soon as he got about 300 or 400 feet from the house he pulled the blade swiftly across his chest and sighed. He always liked the feeling of the first cut he made. He then took the knife and slashed it through both hands and dropped the knife next to his foot. "Jashin-sama, I make this sacrifice in your name." Hidan fell to his knees and made the symbol of his religion in his own blood: a perfect circle around his body and an upside down triangle inscribed in the circle. This is where his bloody ritual would begin. Unfortunately for Hidan, it would not end quite like he expected.

"What the fuck?" Hidan turned sharply with fresh blood running down his chest and stomach to see the last person he would expect. Kakuzu.