A Fond Farewell
(This is set near the end of The Novice, after Akkarin communicates to Dannyl that he must report back to the Guild as soon as he can.)
Tayend reflected that he had never seen Dannyl in such a state of panic. His forehead was creased with worry, his eyes wide and alert, his whole body tense. As Dannyl ended his mental communication with the High Lord, he hurriedly had explained to Tayend that he must return to the Guild, under Akkarin's strict orders. This meant taking a ship from Capia straight back to Imardin, with little delay. As the two men hastily rode onwards, Dannyl announced that Tayend would be best to stop off at his sister's house, while Dannyl continued on to Capia. Tayend recalled his own protests: "Dannyl, I don't want to leave you, not after all we've been through at the Cavern."
But the magician's response had been adamant. "It looks too suspicious, you travelling back to the Guild with me. I- we can't risk it."
Finally, after a day's hard riding, they reached the outskirts of Mayrie's vast vineyards. Tayend's heart accelerated with anxiety and dread at what he knew was to come. Part of him felt a bitter anger at the injustice of it all. After months of holding what had seemed to be an unrequited affection for Dannyl, he finally discovered the astonishing truth: Not only was the magician also a lad, but he had feelings for Tayend, which he had been using magic to suppress all along. Tayend had been overwhelmed by a flood of pure joy at this revelation. He had never truly believed that Dannyl would ever return his love. Yes, he had fantasised about it, but he never honestly expected him to be interested in a man who spent most of his time surrounded by dusty bookshelves and ancient tombs. Tayend sighed as he remembered the conversation they had, outside the Cavern only four days ago…
"Tayend- your sister told me something." Tayend's eyes widened with shock, and then embarrassment. He looked away quickly as his cheeks grew hot. Dannyl hesitated. "Is- is it true?" The magician whispered gently.
The softness in Dannyl's voice helped Tayend summon the courage to meet Dannyl's curious gaze and reply, "Yes". Dannyl was stunned for a moment, before an irresistible smile transformed his face, making his eyes shine brightly. Tayend managed to go on, "I've never stopped thinking about you from the moment we met at the docks. And I loved you ever since you saved my life, and accepted me for who I am". The scholar found it was a massive relief to at last express his feelings, which had been hidden deep inside him for so long.
Dannyl was blushing now as well, something which amused Tayend, who had never seen him do so before. The magician's shy smile never left his face as he answered, "Oh Tayend…How could I not accept you for who you are? You… you're intelligent, brave, thoughtful, generous, caring and honest! I… I'm sorry it's taken me this long to fully realise how wonderful you are, and how much I… I need to be with you." Dannyl finished in a rush, face flushed, his eyes wide and expressive. Tayend felt his heart would explode with delight as Dannyl tentatively reached out to gently take his hand. They spent the next two days in each other's blissful company, chatting about their pasts, fears, and hopes, as well as discussions on more humorous matters.
Tayend was perfectly content with taking their new-found relationship slowly. He himself had never felt this strongly, and wanted to savour it as much as he could. It was clear that Dannyl wouldn't be comfortable with a lot of intimacy for some time yet. What bothered Tayend about this was his own responsibility. It would be up to him, when appropriate, to help Dannyl take the next step in their relationship. Dannyl would look to him for guidance. Although more than happy to support his lover, Tayend was worried about Dannyl experiencing discomfort, or even disappointment, in their intimate relations. After all, Tayend had never been very close to a man before. The only notable exception had been a year ago, but that relationship hadn't lasted long, and all they had done was kissed. Tayend simply didn't feel experienced enough to be able to put Dannyl at ease and take control. But for the moment, he decided to push these worries out of his mind and enjoy the magician's company.
Tayend was brought back to the present as their horses reached the end of the long drive up to the manor. As Mayrie was fetched by a servant, Tayend shared a sombre glance with Dannyl. The magician still wore a mask of apprehension, but he assured the scholar that he could stay a few minutes before he rode off to Capia.
Ten minutes later, after Dannyl had briefly explained the situation to Mayrie, Tayend trudged wearily up the stairs to the guest room which he would be using. His heart fluttered as Dannyl soon strode into the bedroom, and securely locked the door with magic. After a hesitant pause, the magician walked over to Tayend and embraced him tightly. Dannyl's arms around him made Tayend feel safe, and for a moment he forgot about the magician's imminent departure. When the Dannyl stood back, his hands remained on the young man's slender shoulders. For the first time that day since Akkarin's call, Dannyl's expression was softened and full of fondness. Tayend's eyes glistened with tears as he whispered hoarsely, "I don't want you to go…"
Dannyl rubbed the scholar's shoulders in comfort. "Don't worry Tayend, I'll get this all sorted out as quickly as possible. Then as soon as I'm finished, I'll return straight back to Elyne…to you. It'll all be fine, I promise." These words, as well as a final long embrace eased Tayend's pain ever so slightly. But as Dannyl bid farewell as he left the room, Tayend knew that without the magician a part of him was missing. This aching gap could only be filled when Dannyl returned.
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