A/N I was re-watching the episode called 'thank you' the other day and I felt inspired by kushina's love for her little family. This is just a one shot into her last moments. Reviews are always appreciated as conveying emotion is a big part of writing and I hope this will help me out with my larger projects such as Icha Icha Gambit.
One last thought
As every one of her senses started to dim she became acutely aware of two sounds. They filled her up completely; the only things that mattered in the end.
The first was the sound of Minato's breathing beside her. It gurgled slightly, evidence of blood in the lungs and each passing one seemed longer, harder, as if it was becoming too much of a struggle to get the air to fill his body. She knew her own breathing must sound quite similar to him, but she couldn't hear past his as it flew by her ear. It seemed the oxygen he needed so badly was racing to get away from him as he struggled to pull it back through his lips.
She loved this man completely. There was nothing she loved more than resting her head on his chest while they lay together at night and listening to his slow, relaxed breathing as he slept. The sound wasn't the same; too laboured, but it lulled her into a gentle, soft haze all the same.
He had been there for her when no one else had. He had loved her unconditionally when no one else had even looked at her. She forced her eyes to focus on that beautiful face. If it was the last thing she ever looked on in this world, she was content. At least he would be there with her, whatever it was that came after death. She could think of nothing worse than one of them leaving the other to carry on alone in the world and she was thankful neither of them would face that despairing existence.
His face was flecked with blood. His, hers, she didn't know, but it was still perfect. His eyes were half open looking glazed but still that astounding shade of blue that had always remained, in her opinion, the most beautiful colour ever to have appeared in the world. His eyelashes curled out gently, evidence of tears clinging to them in little droplets. She knew he would be hurting, devastated she was going to die like him. Perhaps knowing they would be going together wasn't as much of a comfort to him as it was to her. Perhaps she was selfish, not wanting to face life without him. He was so strong, she knew he would be able to carry on through the grief and do what was necessary, but she couldn't. An image of his face has Naruto came into the world flashed in her memory. He looked so overjoyed, so stunned... She wanted to burn that image over the top of the one that was currently on the Hokage monument. Nobody had ever looked at her with so much love as he had in that moment.
Kushina wanted so badly to raise her hand to his face, to feel that soft skin under her finger tips, but she couldn't move. She had accepted long ago that she would die as a shinobi. She expected it to be bloody and painful, and although the gaping hole through her body looked like it should have had her screaming, she felt nothing. Her body was completely numb, no pain whatsoever. She was thankful, she supposed. Not being distracted by painful spasms as her body shut down left her time to contemplate. She wasn't sure why it was so important, but she wanted her last thought to mean something. It had to mean something because she would not die without somehow having had an impact on the world.
But that was the second sound. There was a baby crying. Her son.
Her son.
It was still unbelievable that her body had been able to nurture a tiny couple of cells into another life. He was so loud! He would be hungry, maybe cold, definitely exhausted... She just wanted to rock him gently to sleep so he could forget about everything that had happened to him on the day of his birth. She had caught a glimpse of Hiruzen-sama holding the little bundle that was Naruto as some other ninja placed her next to Minato. The Third would look out for her son.
Kushina had never felt so thankful in her life as she had for Minato providing her with a small moment to lay next to her sleeping son, to stroke his hair and simply watch him. Minato had provided her with such a gift. He hadn't needed to die. He could have lived and looked after their son but by using the Death Reaper Seal, he had provided her with a chance to meet Naruto one day. It would be to help tame Kurama, but it would be a chance to talk to her son. She wondered if he would ever know. Would anyone tell him that his mother and father had thrown themselves in front of a terrific beast to save him? The same creature that was now sealed away inside of him... her own son had become a Jinchuuriki just as she had been. She would not have wished it on her enemies, let alone her own blood. She hoped he would learn to be happy, as she had. She prayed with every conscious thought she still possessed that he would find someone to make him smile every day, as she had. Kushina remembered Mito's words and knew that her son would understand himself one day. She knew mothers always wanted the best for their children but she had never truly understood what that meant until this moment. With every fibre of her being she wanted him to grow up with a smile always on his face. She wanted to be there to chase away everything that upset or frightened him, to annihilate anyone that would try to do her boy harm.
She felt Minato cough slightly, a small sound.
Their boy.
They had done this together, but now neither one of them would be there to watch over him, to protect him. Her eyes blurred as tears began to form. He was going to be so alone. How could he smile, a gesture she would imagine as being as beautiful as the man's before her, without his family with him?
Minato's eyelids flickered and his crystal blue orbs met hers. It seemed hard for him to focus and even more of a struggle for him to form words.
"He's going t-to be so.. strong..."
He moved his hand up to slowly stroke through her hair, but where he found the strength for that small, simple action she would never know. She wanted so badly to reciprocate it but her body was already spent from the labour, let alone everything that had transpired afterwards.
He was right of course, their son would be strong. How could he not be with a man like Minato as his father? She of course assumed something of her would be reflected in her son as he grew. She could only hope it wouldn't be her brash nature and loud, inappropriate speech mannerisms. He already had his father's wonderful, bright hair. She hoped is eyes would be as blue too.
Minato's eyes slid shut. The Reaper Seal was taking affect, his breathing was becoming slower. She cursed lightly in the back of her mind. The bastard was going to go first, wasn't he? He was going to leave her alone, if only for a few seconds. Of course, he was the Yellow Flash, it made sense he would win every race, even the one into the next life.
"Thank you..." Minato breathed.
A small sound escaped her.
She wanted so much to hold him but no matter how much she inwardly screamed at her body to move, she could barely twitch. Her vision was fading around the edges, and she fought hard to keep him in her sights. He was the most important man in her life. He was revered by everyone in their village, someone had to witness his death.
She heard her son give a small hiccough.
You are so loved, she thought.
She tried to imagine what his life would be like. She hoped it would be filled with laughter and so many friends that he wouldn't feel the loss of not knowing his parents. She looked forward to the day the chakra Minato had placed inside the small boy would allow her a short moment to speak with him. Learn his friend's names and hear of all his adventures... She had told him she hoped he found it easier to make friends than she had, hopefully she would hear about the few great ones he put his trust in. She would like to know their names.
She imagined him becoming a man, a process that she had no doubt Jiraiya would be a part of somehow. That old pervert better not teach her son any of his indecent tricks! She wondered if little Kakashi would keep an eye on him. Minato's student was young himself, but very strong and she hoped he would keep Naruto safe for the sake of his sensei, if not for her.
Naruto..
She could barely hear him anymore. The sounds were dimming as her body began shutting down. The soft sound of Minato's breathing was the only thing she could really concentrate on. It was frighteningly slow now. This man had given her everything.
Hope, purpose, courage, so much love... and finally, a beautiful child.
Kushina's eyes shut slowly. If she tried she could almost trick herself into believing that they were back home, lying in the dark. She imagined the soft blanket pulled over them, heads resting together on the same pillow. There were no sounds in the night, except the occasionally chirping cricket and the steady symphony of his breathing...
She knew the moment it had happened. Minato blew one last sigh across her and was still.
It seemed so cruel. How could someone filled with so much life suddenly not be? The tears spilled forth, as she tried desperately to fight her body for one last touch. Just one more brush of fingers over his soft, slightly parted lips...
There was no sensation in her limbs at all. She couldn't even feel the tears sliding down her cheeks, though she knew they were. It was so unfair! For Minato, for herself and especially for Naurto. Whoever that masked man had been was going to have to watch himself. She would haunt him for all eternity if she could. And when he finally joined them in the afterlife, she would show him the meaning of hell.
No, she admonished herself. She had wanted her last thought to mean something, hadn't she?
What was it again?
Oh, that was right, she hadn't figured it out yet. You better hurry, a voice whispered through her head. She knew for certain her dying moments were not going to be focused on the bastard that had done this to her family.
Family.
It felt wonderful to think. She supposed it would feel even better to say it out loud but that wasn't happening. She wondered what other shinobi thought about when they lay dying. Probably about the will of fire or how they had died like true ninja.
If they had families of their own, surely their thoughts would be on those back in the village that they were protecting with their lives.
Maybe that should be it...
Kushina felt everything slipping away from her. She wanted to open her eyes one last time, to look upon Minato's face before it happened, but no matter how she willed it, her eyes refused to obey.
She heard Naruto crying, but it sounded distant, as if she were underwater. Where she was going was beyond him now. The life of a shinobi family sure was cruel...
No, she fought with her conscious... that couldn't be it...
His cries grew fainter. Everything that needed to be said had been said to her little boy; she hoped her words would somehow get to him and he would indeed grow into the strongest ninja in Konoha and follow all of his dreams. She couldn't feel it, but her mouth moved into the smallest of smiles.
This was a death worthy of a shinobi, but she would not die as a ninja of the Leaf.
She would die as a mother.
