You ● Me

Written by Emma Sarah

Chapter 1: Tall, Dark, and Hunky

"Oh, my! What happened?" Marie looked up from the countertop to find the figures of Tir McDohl and his attendants, Cleo and Gremio. It was pouring rain outside; the sound of the steel gutter rattled violently above the entryway.

"We're…in a bit of a sticky situation," Tir looked over to Cleo, whose blue eyes reminded him of the storm that raged outside.

"Marie," Cleo tried to smile, although her brow was knit worriedly. "We need to seek shelter here."

The portly innkeeper's brow rose, "You live down the street…? Oh, in any case. Please come in."

Gremio clasped Tir's hand. "Young Master, don't worry. Ted will be fine; he's a good person."

Tir looked over to Gremio, whose eyes were just as blue as Cleo's, "It's alright, Gremio. Ted's strong…"

Marie listened intently, hands resting against her abdomen. "My, my. This sounds just dreadful. Please, please," she ushered them up the stairs. "We don't have any spare rooms, but you can stay in the attic."

"Thank you ever so much, Marie," Gremio clasped his hands against his breast.

"We'll explain everything," Cleo nodded before following the two boys up the stairway.

"Oh, don't worry about it!" Marie called up to them, "I'll bring some nice hot chocolate." And, she thought, Get the scoop on all of this!

"Knock knock!" Marie sung lyrically, traipsing up the attic stairs while balancing a tray of steaming cocoa.

All of the guests looked rather irritable; they were thinking one thing: Nosy Marie! Gremio was the first to compose himself, "Good evening, Marie. My, my," the blonde looked at the mugs which the innkeeper began to set on the coffee table. "That was…rather fast."

Marie looked up to meet his ditzy smile, which rather nicely disguised his irritation. "Of course. We're proud to serve the son of Teo McDohl and friends," she placed the last mug on the table. Gremio's eyes wandered over the glass, which had an anime kitty painted onto its navy surface. A small bubble near its right ear read "Meow ● Nyan!"

Tir reached for his mug, which burnt his fingertips. "Ow!" he winced.

"Now, now," Marie smiled, slightly ignoring Tir. "What is all of this hubbub about?"

Cleo dipped her pointer finger into her mug indifferently. "Well, where should I begin…?" she lifted up her mug. "Okay, we were asked by Kraze-"

"The good-for-nothing rat," Tir muttered.

"-to visit Rockland, to collect tax money. Kraze is one of the Imperial elite, by the way."

Gremio shook his head, brushing his long blond hair. "Biggest skuzzball you'd ever want to meet."

"After finishing the assignment, we returned back to Gregminster. Upon arriving," Cleo examined her mug, on which an anime puppy saying "Woof ● Wan!" was pictured. "This man, Kanaan, asks Ted to come to the castle for a minute," she noticed Tir's eyes cloud over. "…Well, when he returned, Ted was grievously injured. He was lying upon the entryway in a pool of blood."

"No!" Marie appeared shocked, a severe look on her face.

Cleo nodded, finally venturing to sip her cocoa. "Yes. Well, we took care of him," the brown haired woman paused for a moment. "In my bed, actually. Who decided that? The sheets will be just soaking-"

"Cleo!" Gremio looked at her, horrified.

Cleo reddened, glancing over to Tir. "Oh, yes…Well, in any case, when he awoke, Ted explained that he had gotten into a scuffle with Windy; you know, the Court Magician?"

"Oh," Marie's face looked disgusted. "Awful woman."

"Have you seen that rag she wears?" Cleo exclaimed. "Honey, Halloween is over!"

"Stop it!" Tir slammed his mug down violently, spilling the drink onto the wooden tabletop and cream carpet. "You'd think no one here gives a fuck about Ted!"

Gremio was at Tir's side instantly. "Oh, Young Master, I'm sorry," he said in a motherly voice, discreetly shooting Marie and Cleo a scolding glance. The latter motioned to Marie, the two of them leaving down the stairs and into the hall.

"Well," Cleo whispered. "Pahn, being the dunderhead he is, assumed that Ted was at fault, and informed the Imperial Guards that Ted was staying with us."

"Oh, Lord!" Marie covered her mouth, a gasp escaping her lips.

Cleo nodded, "Soon Kraze was at our doorstep. We were able to escape with all of us in tow except Ted; he explained that he'd be able to act as bait. Young Master's been worried sick ever since."

Marie wiped a tear from the corner of her eye. "Dreadful, just dreadful. Ah…" she looked up toward the hallway clock. "I better let you all get some sleep."

"Thank you very much for your hospitality," Cleo bowed before climbing the rickety stairway. Marie smiled and nodded before walking down the small hallway, which was bathed in fluorescent light.

"Mmmnnh…" Gremio cooed, feeling shining rays of morning sunlight. He slowly opened his eyes. The small room was a slew with blankets and garments. Gremio looked over to Tir and Cleo, who were sleeping in messy, disheveled cots. Gremio ran his fingers through his golden hair, noticing a piping teapot which Marie had placed on the small coffee table. Gremio scooted over to the table in the center of the room. He began to pour a cup of tea, reaching for his hairbrush and roughly brushing out all of the tangles. After he finished, he began to brush the gleaming locks finely, until his hair felt like silk. Gremio smiled, sipping his tea.

"Tea," he heard a low, irritated voice to his left. He turned to see Cleo, her hair wild and expression blank.

Cleo is not a morning person, Gremio smiled awkwardly, pouring her a cup. "Here you go, Cleo!"

"…" Cleo met Gremio's cheery beam with a dead stare. An anime sweat drop ran down the back of Gremio's head.

"Good morning, good morning!" thumping footsteps echoed from the vicinity of the stairs. "How are our little refugees?" Marie emerged, carrying a breakfast tray. Both Gremio and Cleo glared at her while she was busy arranging the dishes on the table, although Cleo still continued to leer at her afterwards.

"M-…" Tir stirred. "Mornin'."

"Good morning, Young Master," Gremio turned to him, beaming serenely.

"Good morning, Tir!" Marie glanced his way, nodding smilingly.

After a few minutes, Tir began to grow a bit bored. "I think I'll walk around a bit," his eyes looked rather restless as he stood up.

Gremio looked up to him, "Please don't stray too far!" Tir nodded before walking downstairs. Gremio and Cleo looked at each other; the blond-haired man could see traces of pain on Cleo's face, which he knew he himself was mirroring. "Tir…"

A loud yell suddenly sounded from the ground floor.

"Aaaah…" Cleo's head spun, still a bit groggy.

"A man's voice…?" Gremio played with his hair a bit nervously. Maybe a soldier? Both he and Cleo stood up and walked quickly downstairs. Tir was standing in the middle of the lobby, being confronted by a man; an Imperial soldier was standing nearby. "W-What's going on here?" Gremio rushed to Tir's side, Cleo close behind.

"You little brat!" the man, dressed in civilian clothing, shouted. "I work my ass off all day, and when I get back, you go bumpin' into me!"

Tir's brow furrowed. "Shut up, y' fool!"

The man's face boiled a bright tomato color. "What did you say?!"

"What's the commotion here?" the soldier, taking notice of the ruckus, looked up from something he was scribbling on his notepad. "Say…aren't you that McDohl kid?"

Gremio let out a quiet scream. Oh, noooooooooooo!!

" 'Ey, 'ey!" a deep, husky voice came from the inn's small restaurant. A tall, dark-skinned man appeared around the corner a second later, scratching his head. "Do you all really think that fugitives would be hiding in the Capital?"

Blonde Gremio's eyes widened at the sight of the man; he could feel himself become hot. That guy is such a hunk… Gremio's azure eyes looked over the stranger's rough, manly exterior from behind a long strand of gold hair, which he was twirling his pointer finger. The man seemed to notice him from the corner of his brown eyes and glanced over at the smaller being. His face looked a bit surprised, but he quickly regained composure, smiling handsomely. Gremio felt his face burn; he heard a chuckle from the vicinity of his Prince Charming.

"Yeah, I guess y'right…" the soldier chewed it over.

The rough-looking man nodded, "Good, I'll teach these miscreants a lesson!" He looked over to Gremio, whispering "I won't hurt you" with a smile that made the lighter-skinned man feel weak. The unkempt man strode over to the door and corralled the other three outside; during exiting, Gremio felt a large hand graze his rear.

"A-Ah!!" Gremio gasped, turning around.

"Must've been the wind," the large man grinned, closing the door.

"Hey, that guy didn't pay!" the sound of Marie's voice called out to the four, who were already rounding the corner of the street.

"Thanks for saving us!" Cleo's eyes were wide as they stopped next to a quiet, shady house.

"Thank you so very much, sir," Gremio bowed deeply, flushing.

His Prince Charming seemed very aroused by this. "Uh…" he scratched his head, "No problem. The name's Viktor."

"Young Master, please say 'thank you' to Viktor," Gremio clasped Tir's forearm. A jealous gleam rose from Viktor's eyes, but it quickly disappeared.

"Thanks, old man," Tir looked away irritably.

"What did you call me?" Viktor looked angered.

"I'm sorry. The Young Master is a bit moody," Gremio's pleading eyes looking up to Viktor instantly appeased the rough man.

Viktor seemed to feel a tad guilty. "You are members of the McDohl family, aren't you?"

Cleo nodded, "This is Tir McDohl, Master Teo's son."

Gremio smiled, "Cleo and I are his attendants."

"I see," Viktor grinned rather devilishly. He took Gremio's hand, smooching it messily; Tir and Cleo's eyebrows rose. "And what is your name, miss?"

Gremio blushed, "M-My name is Gremio." He twirled a strand of downy hair around his pointer finger, "I'm actually not female…" Gremio's face grew a bit wistful. "I would do anything to be a mother…"

Viktor frowned, "You're certainly the most beautiful person I've ever seen."

Gremio jumped, his face a deep scarlet. "H-How can you say such things…We've just met!"

"Sorry, ma'am," Viktor winked. Gremio felt his knees grow weak.

Cleo silently shifted towards Tir. "Geez, things are heatin' up pretty fast…"

"Yeah…" Tir's nodded, eyes widening.

"Okay, hocus focus!" Gremio clapped his palms together. He pulled his hair out of its ponytail; his angelic locks fell sparklingly through the breeze, "How are we going to escape Gregminster?" Viktor stared at him, a trail of drool beginning to form outside his mouth. Yes! Gremio became elated, I knew a hair flip or two would reel him. Cleo rolled her eyes, knowing of Gremio's feminine wiles.

" 'Ey, Pops!" Tir exclaimed, kicking Viktor's shin.

Viktor's fell out of his slobber, "You little punk!!" Gremio clasped his hands together, looking deep into Viktor's dirt colored eyes with a powerless gaze (which drove Viktor's lower region nuts). Viktor eyes rolled back in his head. Good Lord…he thought hazily, trying to suppress the urge to make love to Gremio right there on the sidewalk. "Ah…uh…Right…So…we should probably get out of here."

"Can you help us?" Gremio and Cleo asked in unison.

Viktor grinned, "Yeah. If I do, though," he turned to Tir. "You need to do me a favor, little man."

Gremio bristled. "Master Tir…"

"Yeah, what I said," Viktor nodded.

"Oh boy," Cleo rolled her eyes.

Tir peered at Viktor skeptically. "…What?"

"If I help you out, although I'll rescue one of you no matter what," he flashed a handsome smile at Gremio, who nearly fainted dead away. "I'd like for you to meet someone. Simple, no?"

Cleo's brow arched in thought; Tir studied Viktor before finally sighing. "Sure, I guess…No funny business though; we clear?"

"Sure, Boss," Viktor grinned, nodding. "OK, now all of you come with me," he motioned for the front gate. The group of four headed to the entrance of Gregminster, which was being guarded by a civilian soldier. "Wait here," Viktor stopped. "I'll be right back."

"What is he up to…?" Cleo looked over to the suspicious character, who was whispering to the guard.

"…Dunno…" Tir tensed. Viktor gradually walked back.

"Everything's cool. We can jam," he nodded.

"Geez…It sure is hot out…" the guard, about twenty feet away, rubbed his forehead. "Think I'll take a rest in the shade."

"Viktor, how did you do that?" Gremio cocked his head to the side.

"Eh, no sweat. The Imperial Army's corrupt; a couple a' bucks can shut 'em up," Viktor shrugged.

"Hey, where's my purse…?" Cleo seemed confused, turning around.

Viktor grinned, "Y' shouldn't leave things out like that. People can steal them." He handed Cleo her small parcel.

"What? You used my money to pay off that guy?!" Cleo stamped her foot.

"Eh, let it go," Viktor waved her off, a pleasant grin still on his face.

Gremio smiled faintly, "How skuzzy…"

Viktor looked surprised. "Yo, Gremio!…In any case, you remember the deal, right, boss man?" he turned to Tir.

"Yeah, I suppose," Tir crossed his arms. "Just what is it that y' want us to do?"

"I'd like you to meet someone in Lenankamp. 'Er name's Odessa."

Gremio looked toward the azure sea above them. "That name sounds familiar…"

Cleo jumped a bit, surprised. "I thought so too…"

Tir chewed indifferently, "OK, deal's a deal."

"How far away is Lenankamp?" Gremio played with a lock of hair, seeming a bit nervous.

" 'Bout a day. I can carry you, if you like," Viktor bowed, his husky grin ever present.

"Such a Don Juan…!" Cleo scoffed. She began to walk off; Tir started to follow her after a few seconds.

"Oh, Young Master! Please wai-" Gremio began to run after them, but felt Viktor's warm grip hold him back. He turned around, finding himself pressed against the taller man's chest.

"I'll never met anyone so beautiful…" Viktor stared deep into Gremio's eyes, touching his cheek gently.

"V-Viktor…" Gremio felt his knees growing weak, and began to fall. Viktor caught him instantly.

"I'll always protect you," Viktor's deep, husky voice whispered into the smaller body's ear, holding Gremio tighter.

"Oh, Viktor…" Gremio's face felt so very red. My prince is here. He is so sweet! Gremio felt a large hand grab his behind; Viktor began drooling. "Viktor!"

The four slowly walked through the open hillside. Viktor rubbed his face, on which a bright red hand mark was imprinted, "Ow."

Author Chat: I've recently began playing Suikoden, and completely love Viktor & Gremio. It seems that some people don't think they're well-suited; Viktor is total seme material and Gremio is 100 percent uke. There were also a lot of hints at love and friendship in the game. I took a few liberties, such as adding onto their personalities. Viktor's rascal, rough exterior is slightly Don Juan, while Gremio's become a total spaz. They're really not unaccurate, though; you never see romantic sides of them in the game, but they are multi-faceted! Eeeeek…it feels as if I'm defending myself! Okay, 'til next time! –Emma