Disclaimer: All Twilight characters belong to Stephenie Meyer, Little, Brown, et. al. No profit was made and no copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Note: This was originally posted as an entry in the Twilight No Stress Love Fest, hosted by the fabulous naelany and OnTheTurningAway. The prompt I was responding to was as follows: While the rest of his friends spend Valentine's Day coupled up, Edward decides to head out for the night, looking for fun.
Thank you to OnTheTurningAway for her quick and dirty beta-work!
"...and then we're going to go for a walk on the beach..."
As I listen to my roommate tell me about his 'romantic' plans for Valentine's Day, I find myself increasingly on the verge of barfing all over his shoes.
"That's great, Jake," I say, interrupting whatever other cliched attempt at seducing his lady he has in store next. Of course, the worst part was that Bella was going to eat it up, and I was going to have to hear about the success from both of them.
Never introduce your best friend to your roommate. Ever. You wind up having to hear them have sex in the next room, all the while going "Shh... Edward might hear."
Yes, Edward did hear, and I've been trying to block it out of my memory ever since. Unfortunately those handy little memory erasers from Men in Black don't actually exist. Or if they do, they aren't available for civilian use.
And when said best friend still lives at home with her father? You also end up with a whole lot of nights playing third wheel in your La-Z-Boy while they make out on the couch right across from you.
Who makes out during Iron Man 2? Seriously.
"Hey bitches, I'm ho-ome!" Emmett calls out as he walks in the door of our apartment. He's carrying an extra-large meat lover's pizza in his hands along with a box of hot wings and a 12-pack of Heineken. I have never been more grateful to see the man in my entire life.
"Thank fuck," I mutter as I grab the beer from his hand and take it to put in the fridge.
It's still room temperature, but I don't care. I have half a bottle down by the time I return to the living room.
"What crawled up your ass and died?" Emmett asked. "Scratch that, E, I don't want to know what's been up your ass."
"He's just bitter because he's going to be alone on Valentine's Day - again," Jake says, right before he shoves a slice of pizza into his mouth.
"I'm not bitter!" I insist. "It's a stupid, contrived, commerical-"
"-holiday that celebrates capitalism in an obnoxious display." Emmett and Jake both finish the end of my rant. Apparently I've made it more than once.
"You can come over to Alice's with me and Rose," Emmett says. A string of cheese from his pizza sits on his chin, and I wonder for the millionth time how such a slob of a man could have wound up with the most beautiful bombshell of a blonde I had ever seen.
Rosalie wasn't my type by any means, but she was smoking hot.
"And watch Alice slobber all over her new boyfriend while you and Rosalie dry hump like animals in heat? Thanks, but I'll pass."
"Well, Bella and I are coming back here after the beach, so if you could make yourself scarce..." Jake trails off when he sees my scowl.
"Fine. I'll stay out of your way," I mutter through gritted teeth. I have a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach that I'm going to wind up sleeping in my office.
"Rosalie invited her brother to come. The gay one, not the pit crew one you always eye-fuck."
I couldn't help myself, he was fucking hot but painfully heterosexual. I mean, he literally oozed heterosexuality - a ball-scratching, ungroomed-pubic-hair-having, football-watching, straight guy. The last time I saw him, I had had a little too much to drink and I may have told him that if he ever has any inkling of desire to suck a cock that he should call me immediately.
At least he was a good sport about it.
Emmett continues, knowing full well what my glazed-over expression means. "We were thinking maybe you'd like to-"
"No," I say forcefully. "No way. No how. You are not setting me up on a blind date for Valentine's Day."
"But it's not a blind date," Emmett insists. "Not really. It's just like meeting Rosalie, only he has a dick."
I can't help myself and snort at the mental image.
Emmett for some reason takes this as a sign to continue.
"Look, you know I'd never try to set you up, but Rosalie and Alice aren't just meddling. Jay's a really good guy and you have a lot in comm-"
"Thanks, but no thanks. End of discussion," I say firmly.
Emmett opens his mouth again, but the glare I shoot him stops him.
They seem to honor my request and no more is said about the ridiculous sham of a holiday. At least until Bella comes over and starts asking Jake questions about the plans he's made. I leave the room in a huff.
I know they're talking about me, so I do the childish thing and turn up the volume on my MGMT.
I go to work like normal the next day. I actually go in early just to avoid dealing with my roommates. By 6 o'clock, I've put in a 10-hour day, and I have received no less than twelve texts and five voicemails from Alice, Emmett and Rosalie.
There's also a voicemail from my mother.
Even she feels sorry for me.
Great.
I remember Jake's threat and figure I may as well go find something to do for the evening. I'll show them. I don't need to be set up on some stupid blind date or be in some lame, boring relationship to have fun on Valentine's Day. It's just another day. I can have plenty of fun on my own.
I consider going to a club, but I can only imagine the disgusting pink and red hearts and twinks covered in body glitter and I feel a knot in my stomach. Anyway, going to those clubs is only fun with Seth, and he and his current flame are probably having an all-night fuckathon or something.
So where does a sad bastard like myself go on Valentine's Day?
I end up at a movie theater, because being alone in the dark seems like just as good a plan as any. I can't deal with any of the lame rom coms or kids movies, so I go to the dollar theater and watch a lame horror movie that first came out in theaters on Halloween.
There are three other people in the theater with me. Two of these three people are a couple of gothy teenagers who are clearly trying to do the "anti-Valentine's Day" thing, but are really doing exactly the opposite.
So you wear black nail polish and both dress like androgynous vampires. Good for you. You're still on a fucking date at a movie theater on Valentine's Day.
The other person in the theater is another man all by himself.
Two losers.
Anyway, I decide to sit in the same row as him except on the opposite side. I don't want him to feel uncomfortable thinking that I'm watching him or anything, and then I won't have to be uncomfortable with the idea of his eyes on me.
What can I say? I'm a considerate guy.
The movie starts, and it's easily the worst movie I've seen since The Room. The only redeeming feature of it is that the loser down the row laughs at all the same places I do.
"Oh, come on!" He says out loud when someone gets impaled by a boomerang.
I giggle. A manly giggle, of course.
"That's not even physically possible!" I groan, as the boomerang continues its journey in a completely different direction and into the killer's hand.
The other man snorts. We both turn to look at each other and grin. He's not what I'm expecting, that's for sure. He doesn't look like a socially inept weirdo. In fact, he's kind of cute. It's too dark in the theater to get any details, but I don't see any hideous boils or missing teeth.
A shriek from the speakers makes us turn our attention back to the screen.
"You can see the boom mic operator in the mirror!" he says with a laugh.
I burst out laughing.
The goth couple turns around and glares at us. Their pale skin glows eerily in the light from the movie screen.
I roll my eyes and stand up. They misinterpret my action and turn around quickly. I move down the aisle and sit in the seat next to the seat beside the mysterious man. A buffer is necessary in this situation. I worry for a second that I should have left two seats between us, but then he reaches over and gives me a gentle slap on the arm. I turn to look at him and he points to the top right corner of the movie screen. It takes me a second, and then I realize that you can see wires holding the killer up as he makes a spectacular leap off a building.
I burst out laughing again. All the technological advances in movie making and this shit slides through.
For the next hour, me and the maybe-not-a-loser-after-all make fun of the movie. Gomez and Morticia turn around to glare at us three more times.
The lights come up even before the credits roll, and I get my first real look at the Crow to my Tom Servo.
He's not only not creepy-looking, he's actually rather handsome. I mean, if you like rugged, dirty blond, blue-eyed, dimpled types.
"I'm Jasper," he says, sticking out his hand.
"Edward," I say, shaking it. Then I get the obvious question out of the way. "So, if you don't mind my asking, what brings you to the dollar movie theater on Valentine's Day?"
Jasper laughs. I'm running through scenarios in my mind and the top two I can come up with are that he works here and drew the short straw or that his girlfriend just dumped him and he wanted to get out of the house. How a woman could leave those dimples, though, was beyond me.
"Well, my boyfriend and I just broke up. I guess I just didn't want to mope around the house tonight. I figured this was the most likely place to go where I wouldn't get sympathetic looks. My sister even invited me to a couples-only party tonight in the hopes of setting me up. Because that's exactly what I want to do on Valentine's Day."
Boyfriend?
The night just got more interesting.
"What about you? What's your story?" he asks me, and I realize my mouth is dry.
"I kind of hate Valentine's Day," I blurt out. "I mean, it's a complete ploy by greeting card companies, florists, Godiva and DeBeers, and, well, I guess I didn't want the sympathetic looks either."
I hang my head down and then look up sheepishly. Jasper is clearly trying not to laugh at me.
"Plus," I continue. "One of my roommates told me to stay away from our apartment tonight so he and his girlfriend can be as loud as they like."
Jasper really is laughing now.
"So what? Are you going to stay for the 11 showing, too?" His eyes are dancing now with amusement and I want to be mad at him. I mean, I'm basically a complete stranger, and here he is making fun of me. Then again, if I'm even pseudo-responsible for making those dimples appear, I'll gladly be a willing participant.
"I think one viewing of that cinematic masterpiece was more than enough for me," I say truthfully.
"Okay, well," Jasper puts his hands on his knees and starts to stand. "It was nice to meet you Edward."
No! No! No!
"Wait!" I say. The desperation is dripping in my voice, and I hope Jasper can tell. Jasper raises an eyebrow at me. "I still have at least two hours before it will be safe to return to my apartment. My roommate is probably just nearing the end of his lame-ass walk on the beach now. It'll take his balls at least an hour to recover from the cold, and then a half hour until his girlfriend fakes her orgasm, another fifteen minutes for him to fall asleep, and a final fifteen minutes for his girlfriend to finish herself off in the bathroom." So what if that only happened once? It's what Jake gets for calling me bitter. "How do you feel about onion rings?"
Jasper is full-blown laughing now. He's clutching at his sides and I have an overwhelming craving to make him laugh like this again.
"I haven't laughed like this since Peter and I broke up." Jasper is practically gasping for breath. "And I happen to love onion rings."
"There's a great diner just around the corner," I say. "If you're up for it?"
"Sure," he says with a nod. His eyes are twinkling, and I'm pretty sure my heart skips a beat.
We leave our cars in the nearly empty parking lot and walk to the diner.
"So, Edward," he asks me. "I'm not trying to be nosy, but how is a guy like you single anyway?"
Shit. This is the question I've been dodging for the past year. My friends just think I'm too picky and frequently berate me for it, but it's not their fault. I hid a lot of things about my last relationship from them.
"Um," I say with a hard swallow. "Do you want the polite answer or the real answer?"
"What's the polite answer?" he asks.
"I just haven't met the right guy yet," I say.
Jasper's foot catches on a crack in the sidewalk, and I reach my arm out reflexively to steady him. I hope it's not a coincidence that he stumbled exactly when I revealed that we bat for the same team.
"And the real answer?" he prompts, recovering from his stumble.
"My last relationship ended about a year ago in a really shitty way, and I haven't been willing to trust anyone since."
"So he..." We've reached the diner, but Jasper pauses by the door.
"Cheated on me, yeah," I finish for him.
"I'm sorry, Edward."
"It's okay," I say, looking down at my feet. "It's more embarrassing than anything else really. I mean, he cheated on me for months without me realizing it. When I caught him in the act, the other guy looked at me like I was an idiot. It was like everyone knew but me."
It's sort of a relief to get that out, actually, but the light-heartedness of our earlier rapport is vaporizing.
"It's not embarrassing to put your trust in someone, Edward," he says.
I look up. The surety in his voice and in his expression is almost overwhelming.
"I guess I just need to be more discerning in who I choose to trust." I'm staring into his eyes now and my breath catches in my throat.
The diner door swings open and a drunk couple spills out, ruining our moment. Jasper grabs the door before it slams shut and ushers me to go inside in front of him.
The waitress gives us a funny look when she seats us and hands us menus. When she comes back to take our order, Jasper startles me and grabs my hand, holding it on the table, rubbing his thumb back and forth over it in a soothing motion. He orders casually, but he has to repeat himself because the waitress is staring at our hands.
"Sorry," he says when she leaves.
I have no idea what he's apologizing for until he lets go of my hand. I immediately miss the contact between us.
"No big deal," I reply.
"She just looked kind of disgusted at us. I know I should just let it go, but it still pisses me off every time."
"I wonder why she assumed we were a couple," I say.
Jasper blushes and I can't fathom why.
"But if you want to come over to my side of the booth when she comes back, I wouldn't be opposed."
Jasper just smiles at me and switches the conversation topic.
We spend the next few hours just talking. We mostly cover movies and music, but sometimes the conversation drifts to more serious topics. We talk a little about our families, both of us sharing the same experience of feeling like we didn't fit in for a long time after we came out. I can't remember the last time I felt this kind of a connection with anyone. I kind of feel like Jasper and I are old friends, but at the same time, I want to get to know him better.
It's only when the waitress's dirty looks become more about us taking up her time than about our sexual orientation that was decide to leave.
"So," I say as we stand outside the diner. "What next?"
I'm afraid this is goodnight, but then the sweetest words come out of Jasper's lips.
"I honestly don't want for this night to end."
"Come back to my place," I say impulsively. Jasper's expression reads as slightly terrified, so I backpedal. "I mean, to watch a movie or something. I have a pretty sweet collection of craptastic horror movies."
Jasper looks conflicted, and I figure I've blown it.
"I'd like that, Edward. I really would," he sighs. "I'm just not ready for a relationship or anything right now."
"I get that, Jasper. I respect that. I'm not going to lie and say I'm not attracted to you, but I promise to keep my hands to myself."
I hold my hands up to demonstrate. Jasper laughs at me, and suddenly the world looks brighter.
"All right, sure. Why the hell not?"
We walk back to our cars, and Jasper follows me back to my place. I go in first, just to make sure there's no sign of roommate sex happening. Luckily everything is quiet. I motion for Jasper to be quiet, and we tiptoe through the living room. I enter my bedroom first and flip on a lamp.
I'm horrified at the mess, and quickly grab every article of clothing I see and shove them into my laundry basket. Jasper's laughing at me yet again, and my cheeks burn as he holds up a pair of Hello Kitty boxers that Alice got me for my birthday. I snatch them out of his hands and mutter an apology.
I ask Jasper if he wants anything to drink to try and change the subject. After giving him the run down of our fridge contents, he opts for a Coke.
"Make yourself comfortable," I say.
When I return to my room, my heart jumps when I see Jasper sitting at the head of my bed with his legs stretched out. He's taken off his shoes and he's pawing through the book that had been sitting on the nightstand.
I hand him his Coke and he sets my book down.
"That does look good," he says. "I'll have to pick up a copy."
"You can just borrow mine when I'm done."
"Thanks," he replies.
I mentally high five myself for finally coming up with an excuse to see Jasper again. There's a tiny awkward silence, so I use it to walk over to my DVD rack.
"I can't believe you've never seen Pray for Morning," I say as I retrieve it. "It's really fucking terrible."
I put in the movie and settle in on the bed beside Jasper. I'm careful to keep a friendly distance between us.
The banter we had going in the movie theater continues, and at one point we're both laughing into pillows so as not to wake Jake and Bella. The movie is just as bad as it was the first time I watched it, but watching it with Jasper is ten times more entertaining.
As the credits roll, Jasper lets out a huge yawn.
"Jeez." He checks his phone. "It's already four in the morning. I should really be heading home."
"Just crash here," I yawn back. "I'm too tired to try out my mad seduction skills anyway."
"I don't know," he says but is interrupted by another yawn.
"Come on," I say. "It's pouring down rain and you look exhausted. It's not safe for you to drive."
He looks at me for a second before speaking.
"All right. All right, I'll stay."
"Do you want something to sleep in?" I ask. "I'm sure I have some clean flannel pants or something."
"Sure," he says before asking, "Bathroom?"
"Right across the hall."
Jasper comes back a few minutes later. There's a lingering scent of mint in the air.
"I used your mouthwash. I hope that's okay," he says. He looks nervous. I don't want him to be nervous.
"Of course," I say. I hand him the sleep pants and then go to the bathroom myself.
When I get back, Jasper is standing awkwardly in the middle of my room in my red flannel pants and a white t-shirt that must have been under his sweater.
"What's wrong?"
"I didn't know if you wanted me to go out on the couch or..." he trails off.
"Are we going to have to sleep head to toe?" I tease, trying to put Jasper at ease. He's either nervous because he's not attracted to me and he knows I am, or he is attracted to me and he's worried about being so close to me in a bed.
"I don't know," he muses. "Even with head to toe, the genitals are still lined up."
My cock stirs with interest at the way Jasper says the word 'genitals.' I will it down.
"Just get in the bed," I say with an eye-roll, pretending this was no big deal.
He looks too tired to argue and climbs into my bed. I flip off the lights and get in on the other side, trying to stay as far away from Jasper as possible, lest I decide to get frisky in my sleep.
"Good night, Jasper."
"Good night, Edward."
The sun is streaming through my window when I wake up. It only takes a split second to realize that I'm not alone. I'm still on my side of the bed and Jasper is on his, but we definitely drifted toward each other in our sleep. I watch Jasper sleep for a minute. He's even better looking in the sunlight. His wavy hair is matted on his forehead and his lips are slightly parted.
Suddenly his eyes flutter open, and I'm caught. For a few moments, Jasper is completely disoriented, but then he focuses on me and recognition hits.
"Edward," he says.
"Good morning," I say. "Well, I think it's still morning. It could be closer to noon. I hope you didn't have anywhere to be this morning, because I forgot to ask if you needed an alarm."
A hand on my arm stopped me.
"Edward, you're rambling."
"Sorry."
I don't know exactly what is happening then, because suddenly there's a hand grabbing the front of my t-shirt and I'm being pulled forward. Soft lips press gently against mine in contrast with the rough manhandling to get me there.
A second later the pressure of Jasper's lips is gone.
"What was that for?" I'm in a slight state of shock.
"You just looked too cute and disheveled, I couldn't help it. Consider it a 'thank you' for not man-handling me in your sleep." He winks as he says it, though, and my dick stirs.
"Breakfast?" My voice cracks.
"Sure." He sits up fully and raises his arms above his head in a stretch. His t-shirt rides up, and I get a glimpse of abs. It's enough to get me out of bed and hurrying into the bathroom. I force my half-hard cock down and gather my composure.
Jasper is back in his jeans when I return to my room.
"Bathroom's free," I say before heading into the kitchen.
I put on the coffee and dig around in the fridge. I feel Jasper's presence behind me, so I stand up quickly and turn around.
He's blushing.
He was staring at my ass.
I decide to ignore that fact for the time being.
"Sorry, we only have cereal."
"That's fine," he says immediately.
We fix our bowls and go into the living room. I turn on the TV, and we start watching Mythbusters.
Adam and Jamie are building model helicopter propellers when two things happen at once.
Jacob comes into the living room and looks from me to Jasper in surprise, just as the front door swings open and Emmett's heavy footsteps enter the apartment.
"Jay?" Emmett says.
Jasper's mouth drops open a little. "Emmett?"
"How do you-?" I start to ask, as Jake doubles over in laughter.
He recovers enough to say, "I thought you looked familiar. Nice to see you again, man."
Jasper nods at Jake but still looks shocked.
"Wait," Emmett says. "Let me get this straight. Neither of you knew that Jay is Rose's brother?"
Jasper and I both looked at each other.
"Oh that's too good! I have to call Rose." Emmett pulls out his phone and hits a button. I don't even have time to react until I hear him say, "Hey baby, you'll never believe what just happened. I come to find that E got lucky last night with, you'll never believe this, with Jay!"
"But we didn't-" I start to say.
Then Jasper puts a hand on my knee and shakes his head. I don't understand. I was trying to protect his honor.
He just winks at me and stands up.
"Yeah," he says loudly. "And I think I'm ready for round two. Shall we?"
He holds out his hand and I grab it, still not sure what's going on. He pulls me off the couch and leads me into my own bedroom to a chorus of "oohs" coming from my meddling roommates.
As soon as we're in my room, Jasper shuts it closed and presses me against it with a loud thud.
"Jasper what are you doing?" I finally ask.
"What makes straight men more uncomfortable than anything else in the world?"
Then I finally get it.
"Knowing that there is gay sex happening in the next room."
"Exactly. That should clear them out fast."
"Diabolical," I say with a smile.
"Want to watch another movie?" he asks.
As if I'd turn down a chance to have Jasper in my bed again.
"Sure," I say. "Wait, what do we do when they ask us about what happened?"
He shrugs. "It's none of their business when we start sleeping together."
His wording doesn't escape me, but I don't say anything. I'm already caught under Jasper's spell, and I am more than willing to follow his cues.
Instead, I put in another shitty horror movie and settle back on the bed.
This time when Jasper joins me, I notice there's a lot less space between us.
The End.
