Author's Note: Hello! :D To help with writer's block I'm writing something a little different. Before you start reading I have to apologise for this not being a very long or exciting chapter, but I didn't have time to finish it so had to cut it short, cos I want to make sure it's good before I go writing more, so please review! :D
Disclaimer: I do not own The Mighty Boosh; it is the love child of Ju and Noel :D
Warnings: Can't remember if there's language...
Little one
No-one wants to get up early on a Monday, and Dennis didn't even more so. Shaman Mondays meant long meetings in which hours were spent discussing council matters, and it always ended up as less of a discussion and more of a shouting match which he was left to resolve.
'Dennis...'
'Ugh...'
'Dennis.'
'Ngh...'
'Dennis! Wake up!'
'... Oog...'
'Do you want breakfast, or no?'
'...Ug?'
Mefusula stopped jabbing at her husband with a long fingernail painted rose pink and placed her hands on her hips, a slight smile forming on her lips.
'You soon wake when you are wanting me to make breakfast...'
'Mefusula, my dear, you are wrong,' Dennis mumbled into the pillow, without much sincerity at all.
'Wrong?' She raised an eyebrow as well as the pitch of her voice, and pulled open the curtains, early morning light flooding their bedroom.
The Head Shaman grumbled and dragged himself out of bed, his eyes widening as he saw what his wife had on as she stood in front of the window, which was the alluring sight of not much at all, really.
'Mefusula: the neighbours!' He grabbed a robe and hastened to stand in front of her and shield her from the full view of the window, forgetting about his own, complete nakedness until it was too late.
Sometimes, it was difficult having an Extreme Sports Calendar Model wife.
'I have a calendar shoot in ten minutes, so if you are wanting breakfast...'
'I am wanting breakfast; I am wanting breakfast a lot!'
'Then put on your clothings!'
XXX
The stretch carpet pulled up to pick up Dennis at the same time Mefusula left in a hurry.
'Awwwwwwww, Mrs 'aitch used to 'ave a little wiggle to her step like that...' Harrison commented as the shamans watched her hurry off.
Dennis shot the Xooberonian a look as he climbed aboard the carpet, 'Harrison, if I catch you looking at my wife like that again, I will cut you in two with my sword,' he said simply, as if telling him the weather report for the day as he locked the house door with a click of his fingers, '... I'll drive,'
There was a silence for only a few seconds as the carpet glided through the air, before it was broken by Saboo.
'A wiggle in her step?'
'Awwwwwwwwwwwwh! I knew it, 'ere we go! I was timin' ya, seein' 'ow long it'd take ya to 'ave a little go!' Harrison rolled his eyes.
'Fine then, forget it,' Saboo dismissed, 'We'll only-'
'Nah, go'un then!'
'No, you'll only-'
'No, I wanna 'ear what you have to say, I wanna hear your opinion...'
Saboo sighed, 'Fine. I was simply going to say that Mrs H did not have a wiggle in her step; she wiggled, full stop,'
'Ohhhhhh, so that's it is it, you were checkin' 'er out all that time were you? Checkin' out 'er step?'
'Don't be ridiculous! She doesn't have a step, she has a... print!'
'Please,' Dennis held up a hand, 'Let's not start yet, we haven't even arrived at the lodge...'
'They've been naggin' all mornin'...' Naboo grumbled, 'En't they Kirk?'
'Yes.'
''E's just 'ad a pop at me wife!' Harrison exclaimed.
'Ex wife...' Saboo corrected.
Dennis sighed; the quarrel heralded the start of a long Monday.
