At Night
They are all 16 years old. Mikan and Natsume are together, and so are Ruka and Hotaru.
Mikan sat at her window and glanced over towards the Northern-Forest, she had waited for Natsume to appear for 3 hours. Now it was 2 am, and he still hadn't shown himself. She was starting to get worried, more worried than she was in the start.
FLASHBACK:
"Natsume? What's wrong?" Mikan asked Natsume. She had just found him sitting on his bed with his head in his hands.
"Mikan!" Natsume said shocked and looked up, "what are you doing here?"
"Oh, sorry. The door was open. What's wrong?" She asked as she slipped inside and sat beside him.
"…Nothing. …How was your day?"
"I won't let you talk your way out of this Natsume."
"What? I'm not-"
"Natsume just stop that and tell me what happened!"
Natsume looked at Mikan, probably trying to find out if he was going to tell her or not.
"Fine. I'm going on a mission tonight…"
"What! But you haven't healed from your last mission yet! That's outrageous! If they keep doing this you'll end up d…" Mikan couldn't get herself to say the last word.
"Yeah I know. If they keep this up I'll end up dying, but there's nothing I can do about it. You know what's at stake if I don't… Do you need a reminder? Trust me I remind myself every day. Yuichi, Ruka, Aoi, the most of our classmates and you, Mikan. I can't loose any of you. I just can't! And you know it… I have to do this." Natsume said as he looked down at his hands, in the end he just put his hands over his face and laid down on his back.
"I know… I just wish there was no need for you to sacrifice yourself for our sake…" Mikan laid down beside Natsume and pulled his hands off his face, "I love you Natsume and I will wait for you to come back tonight. Just promise me you're going to be all right… Please…"
"I can't, but I promise you that I will drag my sorry ass back here. Okay?" He said with a smirk.
"Natsume, this is no time for jokes!"
"I know." Natsume said as he pulled Mikan down on top of him and started kissing her, when they broke the kiss to get air Natsume whispered into Mikan's ear: "I love you too polka-dots, I always will."
"What time is it Mikan?"
"It's eleven…"
"I need to go now… See you, Mikan." Natsume went out the door.
"…Natsume. Natsume wait!" Mikan shouted as she ran out the door, she flung onto Natsume and started kissing him passionately. She had tears in her eyes, "Come back safely."
"You know I will, I always do." Natsume gave her a rare smile, "I need to go Mikan, sorry. I'll come back as soon as I can, okay?"
"Yes, come back to me."
"See you Mikan."
END OF FLASHBACK.
Once again Mikan glanced over towards the Northern-Forest, still no sign of Natsume.
"Natsume, please be alright…"
Suddenly someone knocked on the door; Mikan went over to open it, and there stood Koko.
"Koko, what's up?"
"I just wanted to say that I heard Natsume's thoughts a little while ago. He should be back soon."
"What! What did he think?"
"Umm, something like: Fucking mission, Fucking Persona. What the hell were you thinking you bastard. Did you hope that I would die? Well think again you son of a bitch… He just went on grumbling like that to himself."
"That does sound like Natsume. Do you know if he was hurt?"
"No, but you know Natsume. Even if he was hurt he would probably just ignore it and keep going without thinking about it."
"Yeah, I know… That idiot." Mikan said as she smiled a sad smile.
"Huh?" Koko said as he made big eyes.
"Koko?"
"Mikan hurry I… I just lost Natsume. The Northern-Forest. Come on." Koko said shocked, that had never happened before.
Mikan's face starred in disbelief at Koko, before she pulled on her coat and ran out of the door. Koko followed soon behind her.
"It's just up ahead!" Koko yelled to Mikan.
Mikan stopped suddenly causing Koko to bump into her, before them laid Natsume. He was unconscious and had multiple cuts all over his body, plus blood running down the side of his face.
"Natsume… Natsume!" Mikan said at first frozen but then ran over and sat beside Natsume. She started shaking him by the shoulders and kept yelling his name over and over.
"Natsume!" Mikan had tears in her eyes. She leaned down towards Natsume and gently pressed her mouth against his, kissing him more and more. Waiting for a sign of life, waiting for his lips to make the same movement as they always did, she kept kissing him hoping he would wake up.
"Mi…kan…" Natsume whispered as he opened his ruby eyes and looked at them.
"Natsume. Thank God! Are you okay?" Mikan looked worriedly at Natsume.
"As you can see… I am perfectly healthy."
"No, jokes! Lets get you inside. Umm, Koko how are we going to do that?"
"If you can take his arms then I can take his legs."
"Like hell you are! Help me up. Cough" Natsume said as he pushed himself up from the ground.
"Are you sure? You don't seem fit enough to-"
Koko help me up now or I swear in gonna… - Natsume thought.
Natsume held out his hands, Koko took them and pulled him to his feet. He swayed and was about to fall down again if Koko hadn't caught him and pulled his arm around his shoulder. Mikan put Natsume's other arm against her shoulder and they started walking towards the academy.
They had just come inside the hall when Natsume started coughing, just dry coughs, and no blood.
When he was done Koko asked: "Why do you have to do this Natsume?"
"Why? I don't even remember… It all seems so meaningless right now…" Natsume said while he panted.
"You remember Natsume, you have to, and it's what keeps you going. Just repeating the names of the people you save by doing these missions that what gets you through them. Would you like me to do it for you this time? Repeat all the innocent lives you spare by doing this? Hotaru, Ruka, Pres., Permy, Nonoko, Anna, Yoichi, Aoi, Koko and me… Don't ever say it's meaningless, you know it's not." Mikan said.
"…I know."
"We're here." Koko said. Mikan opened the door.
"My, my Natsume you don't look so good. What happened?" A voice said from the corner. Persona stepped out of the shadows and walked towards them stopping only one meter from them. Natsume took his hands off Koko and Mikan's shoulders.
"I don't know, what do you think happened to me after you left me in there?" Natsume said as he took a little step forward.
"No need to be cocky, it would be terrible if something happened to the newest member of your gang wouldn't it?" Persona said as he took a step towards Koko.
"Don't touch him! I have the thing you sent me in there for right here," Natsume took a package out of his pocket and threw it at Persona. "Now get the hell out of my room!"
"How dare you speak to me like that you insolent like brat!" Persona said as he threw a punch at Natsume. Natsume didn't have the strength to evade so he was sent to the floor gasping after air. "You can't decide what I can do and what I can't do." Persona took another step towards Koko.
"We had… a deal Persona… don't you dare lay… a hand on any of them…" Natsume threatened between gasps.
"What are you gonna do about it?" Persona looked back at Natsume before extending his hand towards Koko. They both gasped I surprise when a wall of fire roared between them.
"Natsume! …If you weren't so beat up right now I would punish you, but since I'm a fair man I'll wait until tomorrow. My office 8 pm! Be there or else!" Persona said as he turned around and jumped through the window.
Natsume absorbed his fire again.
"Natsume, thank you…" Koko said still shocked by what had happened.
Suddenly Natsume rolled over and began coughing. Getting more and more violent until his body shook with exhaustion.
Finally he stopped; there was blood on his hand and around his mouth. Natsume rolled onto his back to get his much needed air; he was struggling with each breath. The only thing he could focus on was breathing. It looked like he was in so much pain. But even though it was tearing him up from the inside, he knew he couldn't stop.
"You shouldn't have used your Alice Natsume! You knew this was going to happen if you did! Natsume hang on, okay? You're going to be okay! Were are your pills?" Mikan asked worriedly as she looked over at Natsume.
"…Nightstand…" Natsume whispered after a little time. His voice was strained with the amount of pain he was in.
Mikan ran over to the nightstand and opened the drawer; she took a bottle out and poured 2 pills in her hands. Then she ran over and knelt beside Natsume.
"Are you ready?" Mikan asked Natsume, who opened his mouth slightly so that she could give him the pills. He swallowed them and waited for them to work.
"Your gonna be okay Natsume, do you hear me? You're going to be fine. You always are, right? Natsume, you're gonna… You're… Gonna be…" Mikan tried to say comforting things, but maybe most trying to reassure herself that he was going to live. She just ended up crying.
"Mikan, don't cry, I'm fine…" Natsume reassured her as he lifted his hand and wiped away her tears.
"No, you're not fine…" Mikan couldn't stop crying.
"Mikan lets get him up on the bed so that we can take care of his wounds." Koko, who until now had just stood in the corner, said.
"Yeah, come on."
Some miraculous way they got Natsume up on the bed. He was still coughing from time to time, but other than that he looked a little better. He wasn't nearly as pale as he was a little while ago. Mikan and Koko took off his bloodied shirt so that they could tend to his wounds.
While they tended his wounds Natsume laid with closed eyes, the only thing that indicated that he wasn't sleeping or unconscious was the occasional flinch, scowl or cough when it hurt too much. But sometime in the middle of treating him he stopped and his head slumped to one side.
"Do you think he's sleeping, or unconscious?" Koko asked Mikan.
"Someplace in the middle I think. Probably most unconscious, he is a very light sleeper. He would have woken by now if he were sleeping." Mikan answered as she washed the blood off Natsume's face. She looked down at her boyfriend, he had an angel-like face when he slept and didn't have blood on him. Nowadays it was a rare sight to look at him in the night without blood on his face. He was beginning to cough up blood every night, …no matter how many times she saw it she couldn't help but to be equally shocked each time. It wasn't easy seeing the one you loved hurt so much and know that you're partly to blame for it. But she also knew that Natsume needed her to be there, to love him, help him, smile for him and be a reason for him to keep going.
"What's going on Mikan? What's wrong with Natsume? Why does he do this? What does Persona want with Natsume? …With me?" Koko asked Mikan with pleading eyes.
"Don't you already know it all? Haven't you read Natsume's mind?"
"No. Natsume is always very careful when he's around me, and when I do read it he usually thinks nasty things to me. After some time I just stopped." He sighed.
"Well I don't know if Natsume wants you to know, but I guess when your already involved like this I might as well tell you. Well here it goes. Natsume has the forth type of Alice, lets start with that. With his missions, his body's condition just gets worse and worse."
"Then why doesn't he just stop, refuse to do it?"
"He can't stop, Persona has every one of us hostage. If Natsume doesn't do what he says, Persona punishes someone dear to him. That's only happened once…" Mikan said as she starred into space, recalling memories.
"What happened Mikan?"
"Persona was furious, I had convinced Natsume to try and stop. It was a year ago. At first Persona just threatened and tortured Natsume, but Natsume has lived with pain his whole life so he didn't back down. Persona knew he had to use other methods, so he targeted me. He gave me poison, and waited for Natsume to come back to his room. When he did, Natsume hurried to my side. Persona had the antidote and he only wanted to give it to him was if he promised to do everything he told him. So they made a deal Natsume would do everything Persona said, and Persona would keep his hands off his friends and give me the antidote. It has been like that ever since and after that Natsume had to do what Persona said, Persona just gave him more and more dangerous missions. The balance of the deal is hanging on a strand of hair, which could break at any moment. Natsume is doing everything he can to keep it from breaking, but it is just a matter of time before Persona finds a way to break it and keep Natsume as his servant. Natsume's lifespan is soon used, and Persona knows that all too well, he wants to use Natsume for as much as possible before he dies. Natsume's worn out, he does nothing but sleep at school because he coughs up blood at night, he's in so much pain that he can't sleep and when he finally falls into an unconscious-like sleep he only gets a couple of hours… It's not fair!" Mikan explained with tears running down her face.
"Isn't there anything we can do for him?" Koko asked desperately.
Mikan just shakes her head and says: "I'm afraid there's nothing we can do. Not even doctors can do anything for him. Everyday counts… Natsume is struggling but I'm afraid it's not enough anymore… He's gonna… Koko he's gonna die…!" Mikan broke down crying, Koko held her tight as she cried her eyes out.
The light shone through the windows waking Natsume from his unconscious state. His body hurt everywhere, and he let out a few raspy coughs. Beside him laid Mikan, there were traces of tears on her face. He hated making her cry, but there was nothing he could do about it, just keeping himself alive was hard enough.
He was supposed to meet Persona at 8 pm, for his punishment. What could it be this time? Persona's Alice? Torture? He had been through that already…
Natsume ran his hand up and down Mikan's face, savouring the moment. He bent his head and kissed her forehead. Mikan stirred and opened her hazel eyes still clouded by sleep and tears.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you…" Natsume said as he embraced her. His voice was still hoarse from last night.
"Mm… Good morning, how are you doing?" Mikan asked as she snuggled in towards him.
"Honestly I feel like crap. But it's still better than yesterday…" Natsume said muffling a cough. He had given up trying to lie to her about his condition; it just made her worry more.
"I can imagine that. You're not as pale as you were yesterday, you are going to stay home from school today." Mikan noted.
"Do I have a say in this" Natsume asked grinningly.
"Of course not. You weren't actually thinking about going to school were you?"
"Nope, wasn't even considering it."
"Exactly, you're just going to lay in your bed the whole day."
"Well not the whole day…" Natsume whispered in her hair.
"What do you mean?"
"Have you forgotten? I have a fantastic appointment today at 8 pm, with a very loving man. …Just kidding." Natsume said as he grasped her tighter.
"…Are you going to be okay?" Mikan asked anxiously.
"Of course I am, he's not going to kill me. I'm too important… Will you be waiting for me when I get back?"
"Of course I will. How could you even ask?"
"Just checking." Natsume chuckled.
"What time is it?"
"6:30, you have to get ready for school." Natsume let go of his embrace.
"Already? Natsume will you promise me something?"
"Anything."
"Please go to the hospital, to get your wounds looked at. It was only first-aid me and Koko did, you need more treatment." Mikan said pleadingly as she rose from the bed.
"Will it make you worry less?"
"Yes."
"Okay then."
"I'll see you Natsume, I need to go know."
"Wait." Natsume said as he got out of bed swaying dangerously but kept his footing. He went over to Mikan and kissed her.
"See you Natsume, I'll come over after school. Remember to go to the hospital!" With that Mikan left for school.
"Come in." Persona's voice could be heard from inside the room. Natsume went inside.
"Ahh, Natsume. How lovely of you to come, right on time." Persona said with a smirk on his face, as if it was all just a game to him.
Much to Natsume's surprise Koko stood in the corner of the room. Natsume paled a little, thinking Persona had hired him or something like that.
"…What's he doing here?" Natsume asked Persona.
"Him? Don't worry he's only here to observe, nothing more. Did you really think I was going to break our deal? I'm enjoying it! Well to the real reason you are here." Persona said as he placed a pile in front of him, "this little thing hasn't been tested yet but I assure you it's risk-free. It's going to be used as a new interrogation method. You just have to take it and the effects will wore off after 10 minutes or so. …Remember our deal Natsume, you have to do everything I ask you to."
Natsume extended his hand and picked up the pill, before he took it he sent thoughts to Koko:
'Koko, no matter what happens don't do anything. That's just what he wants, a reason to break the deal. Please, don't do anything! I'm sure I'll be fine in 10 minutes… He won't just kill me I'm too useful. Do you understand? If you do anything, then everything that I've done the last year has gone to waste. He'll take Mikan… Please I beg you Koko, please don't do anything…!'
Koko nodded in response.
The effects were instant. One second Natsume took the pill, the next his knees buckled as he grunted and he was on the ground. Curling up into a ball as he shut his eyes, gritting his teeth and breathed heavily. The only thought that was in his head was a scream: I hurt! It felt as though he was being stabbed everywhere over and over again. He was so cold, so cold…
Koko heard every thought that ran through Natsume's head, he had never heard anything like that before no words could describe it except maybe these: cries, pleads that it would stop, hatred towards Persona, love towards Mikan, and all the reasons why he was doing this… Every name of the people he saved rang through his head constantly like he was trying to cling to something to survive and not back down. Because he knew it very well, if he backed down then everything was lost. If he backed down then there was no one to stop Persona from hurting the ones he cared about the most… He couldn't give in, and he couldn't die… There was nothing else he could do but endure the pain and hope for the best…
A tear slipped down Koko's cheek as he stared at Natsume, who had cold sweat running down the side of his face. It was so unfair. He started hating Persona more and more, he almost punched Persona when he remembered what Natsume had said, and restrained himself. His insides were bubbling with anger.
"Looks like the 10 minutes have gone by. Well that was fun! Don't you think?" Persona asked as he kneeled down beside the panting Natsume.
"Well Natsume, pull back the deal or else you're gonna get another one," Persona said with a smile on his face, "Break the deal Natsume! You know you want to. Think about it that was very painful wasn't it? The only thing that you have to do to never feel this kind of pain again is to just say a couple of words: I break the deal. That very easy isn't it? Why are you looking at me with those eyes Natsume? They're kind of scary. Come on say something!"
"I refuse!" His voice shook a little as he said it, but I didn't matter, his eyes had enough determination in them to overrule his voice.
"Well you're asking for it. I just hope your answer will be a little different next time." Persona forcefully put another pill into Natsume's mouth, and made him swallow. The pain soon hit Natsume as he curled up again, this time Persona carried him to the couch and put him on it.
"I refuse."
"…I refuse"
"…I refuse…"
"…I …Refuse…"
"…I… …Refuse…" Natsume whispered, trying to get control of his breathing after the last pill.
"Come on! I don't have all day! 4 words, it's not that difficult! Just say it! Give me your useless little friends! Say it!"
"…I …Refuse…" Natsume answered a little louder.
"Damn it! I don't have any more pills! Why the hell do you have to be so pain resistant! This isn't getting me anywhere!" Persona shouted at Natsume, and then looked over at Koko. "You there! Take him and get out off here! Don't worry I'll get you to break it next time Natsume! Just wait!"
Koko hurried over and helped Natsume up. Natsume's whole body was shaking, he was breathing heavily and was extremely pale, as pale as a sheet…
"Are we going to your room?" Koko asked Natsume.
Natsume shakes his head and whispers: "we're… Going to Mikan's…"
