Changes
"Sora! Sora, wait up! Sora!"
"Hm?" Gazing over his shoulder, Sora paused as he saw Riku chasing after him. "Riku! Hey!" He grinned when the other had caught up to him, though he had not been far ahead of him in the first place. It was just--well. Sora tended to get lost in his thoughts more often than not. He couldn't help it, though...
"Jeeze! I told you to wait already, idiot. Didn't you hear me?" Sora smiled sheepishly and apologized. Riku sighed. "Ah, well. It's not the first time. And what are you doing out so early, anyway? You usually don't come by for another hour or so."
That was true. Even when they didn't have to go to school, Sora still walked to Riku's home. It was a bit farther away than either of them liked, but they didn't complain that often. It was better than never getting to see each other. Definitely worth the walk. Sora made the trip most often, though neither of them were quite sure why, or just didn't want to think about it. Though, when they were younger, it was Riku who braved the roads in order to meet Sora. But Sora thinks that it was just Riku being stubborn--He'd been a kid, sure, but so was Riku. It wasn't like Sora needed the protection all the time, and he sure wouldn't be able to protect himself unless Riku would let him go on his own.
But today had been different. Waking up hours earlier than he usually did--It wasn't even noon yet!--Sora had felt restless in his own house and had gone for a walk. He hadn't known where he was going, just following his heart. Of course, that led him to walk by Riku's house, but he knew that hadn't been his original destination. No, he could feel it. He was headed to the Play Island--headed even further than that, of course. He was going to the Secret Place.
Instinct had lead him and he had grown to be very reliant on his instinct. He always had relied more on his intuition than Riku had; Riku preferred to think and plan than to follow what his heart told him, what his gut had to say. He had taken sides with the Dark, after all--surely a heart that was as pure as his had been had warned him, had shied away? But Riku had saw the power there, and he had given in to the power, focusing on the achievments that he had hoped to gain instead of the cries of pain and hurt that he surely must have heard from his heart. Sora had never done that, he had always thought only with his heart, and though he had faced the consequences, he would not have done differently later. For the most part; he did not like to think over his past mistakes.
"I was going to the Secret Place..." Sora said softly, a look in his eyes that Riku knew to mean that he was feeling and not thinking what had happened there. There was a slightly pained look in his eyes, then, when he covered it in happiness and brightness that Riku was familiar with--that other people were familiar with, because Sora hadn't shown his weakness to anybody else--and smiled at him. "Come with me?"
Riku smiled. "Sure, Sora."
As they walked to the beach, they talked about little things: homework, teachers, classmates, Wakka and Tidus' renewed obsession with Blitzball (that had only been interrupted when two women had visited the Islands; Yuna and Lulu had enticed them for the few months they had been on the Islands) and anything else they could think about. And of course they were mainly silent when they could hear the waves crashing against the beach, wading into the water after they untied their boats and they set sail for their childhood reprieve.
They docked as they had when they were younger, knowing that they were the only ones on this Island, and probably the only ones who cared about it as strongly as they had in the past. This was their one place, a place that would always stay the same, even as it had been erroded by the darkness years before. Their Secret Place would be the same, as would the others on the Island. Riku's Island, with the Paopu tree stood tall in the water, as it always had. The Paopu was the same, the beach was the same. Everything...everything was the same, even as it was different.
Before, this place used to be for excitement. Now, it was for relaxation, for enjoyment. It was a place for escape and for rest. Before, many children would come--now, it was only them. The last two people who would return here anymore. Kairi had given it up when Sora and Riku had gotten back; it was a place that she was willing to lose. It was not a place that either of them were willing to lose, and perhaps that was why they were not as close as they had promised to be. She had changed, they didn't like how she had changed. They had changed, she didn't like how they had changed either. And so, their contact was not as often as they once had hoped.
"It seems like it's been a while, hasn't it Riku?" Sora's voice was softer than it normally was, quieter, too--almost like he was awed at the almost familiar sight before him. But Riku agreed. It had not been more than a week since they had last set foot upon the ground here, yet everytime they came, it felt as if it had been years since. Perhaps it was because they had lost it for years, had lost everything for years, that they felt it so acutely.
Sora and Riku were content to just stand there at the shore, facing the land rather than the sea. They had seen too much of the sea, too much of other places where you could gaze at the horizon, too many times had they wanted to return to something so simple as this. They wanted to stay here, forever, if possible. It wasn't the land in between, but it was their in between. Between the time when they were simply children and fighting over something as stupid as a girl's affection and when they became adults too young, opposite in a war that neither of them wished to fight.
It was not their haven, but it would do. That, too, was a change from their youth.
"Lets go, Riku." Sora said, and his voice was still soft and quiet, not rising much above the crash of waves behind them. Patience was apparent in that voice and it startled Kairi badly when she had first heard it's whispers from between Sora's lips. He took a step before Riku had responded; impatience in his actions that had betrayed his calm. Though he would wait, he would continue to move. Riku followed him to the Secret Place and stood in near shock, looking around in wonder.
Though Riku made the trip only once or twice per week, Sora must have made it once a day. Riku did not spend much time in this place, this being the first time he had entered since years before, when it fell to darkness. Sora, or maybe Kairi, had been in here far more often. Judging from the look of the map that Riku had begun to draw in his far earlier years--based from fairytales and stories that other's had told him, leading to new areas to be made in his mind--Sora had been adding and adding, never stopping the additions. Worlds upon worlds had been added, their names scribbled nearby, or even inside of, the pictures. The earliest worlds were there, the ones that Riku had started off with, and they had remained nearly untouched, names being added and other areas being drawn between them.
The other walls were being covered, as well. The picture of Sora and Kairi was prominent, though, because someone had made changes to it since the last time he had saw it. Paopu had been added, shared between Kairi and Sora. The area around that picture had remained almost untouched, as if Sora did not want to go near it, or could not bare to change it. Riku idly wondered which it was, as Sora picked up a stone and headed to another wall.
If one did not look carefully, this wall could have been completely made of grafitti. Riku knew, though, which wall this was, and it was not necessary for Sora to have traced the outline of the Door to Darkness on the wall where he remembered it being. Words were scattered all around the door, some he could not make out, but Sora would have known them all easily. Pictures, too--there was the Heartless Emblem there, inside the door, and below it was the Nobody Symbol. The crown was there, too, but it looked as if it had been scratched out. Unimportant, compared to the other two.
One would think that was one thing that would never change; Sora had always wore a chain with a crown on it, always had a smile on his face. But he had since discarded the necklace, and his smiles were not as bright as they had been. The latter, Riku understood more than most. As for the necklace, well... he had his ideas. He wasn't sure if they were correct, but his suspicions were possible. Sora had never been fond of being used, even when he was a child.
"Riku," Sora's voice grabbed his attention as it often did, holding tightly and he looked towards Sora again, "Can you see it?"
See? See wha--Oh. Yes, Riku could see it. "It's the worlds, isn't it Sora?" But of course, that answer was too simple. Sora's look was not quite cold, yet it was disappointed. "All that has happened in the worlds; the changes in each world and in each and every person. Am I right, Sora?"
Sora's smile was minute, "Close enough, I guess. If you want to see it that way." He turned to the wall and sketched a heart, blacked it out.
"You know," Riku murmered, the echo was what carried his voice to Sora as loud as it seemed to be, "one would think that it would be Kairi who would have an affinity with drawing and recording, not you, Sora."
"Then they must not know either of us very well, Riku." And it was not his imagination that made him feel as if Sora had been cold to him.
But Sora's face was trained on the door he had drawn, his fingers inches above the Heartless Emblem and his vision was turned inward. It was true, that people would not have known any of the things that did not quite surprise Riku. That Sora was so keen on remembering things, that he was afraid of forgetting anything, of letting something become so unimportant to him that he could lose it. That Sora thought near constantly about things, even as he wouldn't tell Riku what it was, but sometimes Riku didn't want to know. People didn't know that it was Sora who did not forgive, not Riku. That it was Riku who smiled more, laughed more, that it was Riku who was slowly becoming the person to keep Sora motivated, to keep Sora from just--letting go. Not the other way around.
Most people never realized how little they fought, now. How often they lied about it. How sick of the constant struggle they were. Everytime there was a question or a strange glance at Riku due to his limp, they would say that it was because Sora had been particularly cruel to him that morning. When challenged by Tidus or Wakka to a little fight, Sora would turn it down with a grin and say that Riku had tired him out so badly earlier that he didn't feel like fighting anyone else today. Kairi sometimes noticed, but kept her mouth shut. At least she understood that part of them; there were some memories that were not worth reliving, especially when they were relived at nighttime, when they were alone.
Kairi had at least enough sympathy for the boys to leave them be. Though, it was she who was most affected by her other half returning. She was colder and more cruel than she had been before, though most would assume that would have been what happened to Sora. Yet, Roxas had not given that to Sora. Or, it could have been, Sora did not take it from Roxas.
Kairi commented when she should not have, or would not have. When asked a question by them, she made a different remark than she would have before. Her calm could be rattled more easily, and her reactions came more unnaturally. She spoke in a cool voice, and dared people to challenge her. Even Selphie stayed away from her at times like these.
"Sora," Riku called softly, not surprised when Sora didn't respond, "Sora, let's get out of here." Too many bad memories come to the surface, I don't want to have you hate me right now. Please. Sora? Sora?
"Okay," he whispered, and gave a glance back at the wall before following Riku out of their spot.
Of course, they found themselves wandering quietly, kicking up a bit of sand as they went, until they reached Riku's Island. It was always there. Sora could finally climb up to the top and pick a Paopu when he felt like it, even as he had nobody to share it with. Well, not how one was supposed to share it.
The Paopu was a fruit for lovers, was it not? What right did he have to split it with his best friend, possibly his only friend, when they had gone through so much? Yet, he did it anyway. Reaching for the star-shaped fruit, he silently bit a piece off and handed it to Riku when he swallowed, held on until Riku would meet his eyes and smile. Riku said that it was okay, when he had asked the first time. It had been Sora's idea, had completely shocked Riku, but... Sora liked seeing Riku's smile, and that time was his favorite of them all.
They leaned against the Paopu tree once they had each eaten half of the fruit, Riku keeping the pit tucked into his pants pocket. Content to stare out at the water for the moment, Sora sighed and let his arm drop down next to Riku's.
"Sora?" But Sora only shook his head, turning his eyes to the sky. "Sora, say something. Please?" Before, it was Sora who would be asking. This time, it was Riku.
"You promised, right?" was the first thing that Sora said, nearly ten minutes later. Riku looked up again to see Sora searching desperately for something in his eyes. "I don't care about the other ones, but... you promised me, right? Don't leave me again." And Riku knew that Sora was holding on as tightly as he could.
"Never, Sora. Never." Riku knew that he would cling as tightly as he could to that promise, as well. "Of all the things that have happened, I promise you. That will never change."
That was the one promise that Sora would never forgive Riku for breaking, and the only promise that Riku would never want to break. The only promise that either of them cared about breaking to the other, because they had both sworn, not with words, but with their hearts.
