Naruto and Sasuke always seem to find their ways into each others arms no matter how hard they find it . though either won't admit their obvious attraction , their secret meetings could end up tearing everything they have apart ...sasuke and naruto mature sexual content
disclaimer: i do not own naruto


I had never seen Sasuke cry so hard, in fact I had never seen anyone cry so hard . It was too painful to listen to, to watch. He was on his knees , pressing his head onto the bed , his body shaking due to his uncontrollable sobbing . His voice was mangled and hoarse, grief stricken repeating "I'm sorry ..I'm so sorry.." . I almost felt like I wasn't part of the whole situation, like I was just a bystander watching . It was funny though that even at that moment, I tried so hard to ignore the truth . Sasuke had never cried like that, those stone cold dark eyes didn't shed a tear when his brother went missing , his sobs were so reserved at his mother's funeral . But this , I knew in my heart that this was more than just for friendship .

Sasuke would never cry like that for me , nor for anyone , not even himself . So why Naruto?. I left the room and shut the door behind me. I could feel this rush of heat creep from within. I leaned back onto the door , my legs gave way and I sunk slowly to the floor . The tears started to fall out of no way , they dripped straight into my mouth and I could taste it. So bitter and salty . I cried for a different reason . Not because my best friend was in an accident , or because my boyfriend seemed to care more about him than for anyone . For some reason I felt so terribly alone.
I didn't realise for a long time , that I had gained an audience. They stared so diligently at me, I figured from their faces that I was acting "undignified" as my mother would put it . I got up quickly , too quickly . I stumbled a bit before regaining my balance and tried to wipe the dewy drops from my eyes. I needed to be strong and composed, I needed to be an adult. Sometimes I wonder for who I always say that for . Determined, I turned back to the door and make to open it . To my surprise the handle twists on its own and swings open. Sasuke stepped out of the room , his eyes empty .
" he'll be ok" I say and force my lips to curl . Sasuke remained silent , I searched his face for an answer but I got nothing . I made to hold him , wrapping my arms around his lean torso , but he didn't hug back . I peered in to the room , Naruto's hand had been misplaced from its original position . His fingers were curled up as if holding on to someone else's. I gripped tighter onto Sasuke who was just motionless for a while. His breathing was steady but his heart was racing .This was a complete role reversal, shouldn't I be the one being comforted?. He sighed deeply , and pushed back on my shoulders. He stared at my face and I stared back , and gave him a puzzled look . He shut the door behind him . Made for my hand and lead me away.
We walked for a bit and got to the elevators , "Where are we going Sasuke?" I asked
"Go home " he mumbled
" we can't just go "

" not we , you" he finally answers
" wha- why ?" I ask.
He looks at me, with such gentleness, he reaches into his pocket and lifts out his car keys . He places them in my hands carefully. " I don't understand" I say .
The lift bell rings and the doors slide open, he ushers me in letting go of my hand . In one breath before the doors closed , he mouthed what I knew but was afraid to ask . " I've been sleeping with Naruto" .
The elevator began to descend , and I felt gravity pull me to the ground . I held on tightly to Sasuke's car keys , mouthing what he had just said. I felt an ache but I didn't know where.


-FLASHBACK-
Spring came down from the second floor on our apartment building in the form of pink petals that seemed to hang suspended in the air . The sun shone relentlessly on the transparent windows and they reflected the lightest blue shade . It was calming . I rolled over on to my stomach and reached for Sasuke. But the left side of my bed was cold. I forgot he said he would be over at his friends . He had just moved in 2 weeks ago I didn't expect him to frequent here . He never spent much time at home any way , he was always out somewhere , doing something . It was unusual for him to not call though . I picked up my phone from the bedside table and called him . it rang for a few times , I felt tense suddenly . maybe he would think I was being too obsessive and I debated whether to end the call or not . There was no answer . I wondered if him seeing the missed call was more "stalkerish" than him picking up . I could feel my forehead wrinkling with worry . I rubbed it intensively .
The doorbell rings , interrupting my ministration . when I answer it, it's Sasuke . He pulls me into his arms and lifts me up . I scream out of fear but excitement also . He gives me a crushed kiss . "sorry.." he says " I think I lost my key" . " it's ok" I say in a breathless laugh , I breath him in and he smells of oranges .I grin at him , because that didn't matter to me right now . He was home and being more affectionate to me than he had in the past weeks .
" you must be exhausted ?" I ask
" a bit"
" I'll get you breakfast " I say rather quickly , I push out of his hands and rush into the kitchen .
while in the kitchen ,I hear the shower start . It's therapeutic , whether the noise from the shower or Sasuke's humming i wasn't sure but it was . I felt more calm than I ever have , we were getting better , the move was working . I convinced myself .
Over the frying eggs and sausage (in separate pans because Sasuke hates things being cooked in the same pan ) , I felt something clamp around my waist . Sasuke came out of no where , still smelling of oranges . he hums in my ear the same tume from the shower and then I giggle .
"Let go , you're getting me wet " I exclaim , faking annoyance
" sorry " he says in a sweet voice and kisses my cheek , he lets go immediately leaving me a little deflated .
" did you have fun last night ?" I ask
my back is turned to him , I couldn't read his face at the time but the pause before his replied was longer than I expected . " yeah it was fun " he finally said " I'm very tired and hungry though " . I knew that was Sasuke for " I didn't want this conversation to go on any longer" , and I didn't complain I had no reason to .
We had breakfast together , I joked about the usual things . It seemed to be all we did now , the usual things . complain to each other about our overbearing parents and eat . It was all he was comfortable talking about lately and I was fine with that , I wanted Sasuke to be comfortable with me .
" so what are the plans for today ?" he asks
" doing some light shopping with Naruto "
" oh.." his eyes dart to the floor " well have a good time " .
He gets up from the kitchen table and heads for the bedroom .
I run after him " I'll cancel if you want" I say .
" No , it's okay . go have fun really , It's.. I just remembered something I had to do is all " he says without turning back .

About 30 minutes later , there is honking outside the building . " Hurry up! Sakura!" came a loud voice . It's Naruto in his orange Pirus . " I'll be right down!" I shout back . I dash for the door , giving one last look to the apartment . Sasuke was standing in the frame of the door , smiling he says " go " . I smile back and off I go.

As soon as I get in to Naruto's car I am meet with reprimands , " What took you so damn long? ! shhesh"
"sorrrrrrrrrrry" I stress trying to look as apologetic as ever. Naruto sighs deeply " don't tell me you and Sasuke were going at it ?"
"no!" I quickly reply , it's a little embarrassing . I don't remember the last time we went at it .
he gives me a wry look and puts the car into drive .
" you know a relationship isn't all about sex " I retorted trying to save myself
" yeah yeah , just cause you're not getting any" he teases
"oh and you are?!"
"as a matter of fact I am " turning out of the apartment complex into the road " I've been to heaven and back Sakura and I've never felt better"
" Found a new victim , or maybe several you whore! " I tease back
" No need to get jealous " he says " don't hate the player , hate the fact you ain't playing!"
we laugh . I always laugh when he's around.
" so you and Sasuke .. patched things up…?"
I know he is only asking to be a good friend , but I still feel a little ashamed that he knows of our troubles. " yeah " I lie " we are all good now , in fact never better ."
"aww , here I was waiting for my chance to steal sakura-chan away "
I laugh . it makes me happy because he says these things to make me feel confident , I laugh because he would never try to steal me away because he likes men . " you have a better chance of stealing Sasuke away!" I say jokingly . Naruto responds with a breathless giggle .
He turns on his stereo at the traffic light , and thrift shop starts to play . "I love this song " he says while grinning and starts half singing half humming the tune . " wow you are such a talented artist " I say stressing the word artist to mock him . " I know I am !" he says .
I giggle. Back in school Naruto would've never sing like this , not to me at least . he was such a recluse . He barely even spoke, now I was in his car, going shopping . He had become so confident I was a little proud . " you learnt from the best ".
he laughs " what you mean the band back in school?"
"yeah I was the best lead singer you guys had ever had" I shout
" please we only decided to ask you because all the guys would be all over you , and all the girls would want to be near the band to steal your place"
"cause I was hot " I say " no I am hot " twirling my hair in an overstated gesture
"woooow talk about big head… big forehead"
"shut up!" I say before giving him a hard smack
" you were just a tease !" he says jokingly.
In school , Naruto was one of the guys who was all over me , he'd ask me out every week and I would always reject him . I would've like to date Naruto . He get along so well , but I was hung up on Sasuke then , still even . I would've done anything to be with Sasuke , I wonder if he is thinking about me .
"Hey scatter brain! are you there?!" Naruto screams
"so-sorry" I manage my train of thought broken
"oh I'm sorry was I interrupting some convo in your head"
" Yeah you were" I replied
"well we are here!"
we arrived at the centre . I open the car door letting the cool breeze in . it's only then I notice the new car smell in Naruto's car ."mmm you changed your fragrance again sir?" I ask . " yes " he replies "it's orange"


" Sakura , what's happening ?! what's going on ? what happened to Naruto?"
"calm down Minato , Naruto is fine , he just has a concussion and is out for a bit" I reply to a frantic father . I never know really what to say in these situations . I wrestled the door of Sasuke's hummer which seemed like a solid wedge to me.
"where , what hospital is he at ? I'm coming right now!"
" no!" I start " he will be really upset if he knows he ruined everyone's holiday , don't worry he'll be fine I say ". I hear a reluctant sigh , as I finally settle into the driver's seat
" well I'm still coming tomorrow ,..that idiot !" . I laugh weakly . I never knew parents could get so flustered. I envied Naruto so much at this moment, I never knew so much he had . "..thank you Sakura " came Minato's voice
"what for?" I asked, as I put the key into the ignition.
"for being so calm , please take care of him . I know I don't even have to ask . You and Sasuke are probably by his bed side right now .." I jerk my hand away from the key.

I laugh . I laugh because I am not calm but a wreck. I feel so screwed up now , I need someone but he's with someone else right now . we say our good byes and I hang up . I start the car up and start to drive . when I brake at the traffic light , the feelings that had not yet organised themselves in my head had clicked. The cry burst out of me , I didn't know whose voice it belonged too . I hadn't cried for so long.
The smell of oranges permeated Sasuke's car, so much so I could taste it mingled with the salt liquid.