CHAPTER 1 : THE CASTLE TO OURSELVES

Luxuriating in bed the first morning after the tournament seemed a perfect idea to Merlin. There would be no training and Arthur had planned to have a very easy day, socialising with his guests and getting feedback from the competitors.

Within a couple of days, the royal guests and their retinues would have left but a few would stay on longer. The Princes Michael and Rhys of Wales intended to stay as Michael's wife Roxanna's parents were also visiting their son a Camelot knight, Sir Robin of Northanger and Arthur had insisted that they extend their visit.

Merlin was conscious that Arthur was awake so, he said quietly "Good Morning Handsome!"

Arthur slid himself so he was lying once again beside Merlin and said, "Merlin, I need…" There was a pregnant pause.

Merlin turned to look at him and said, "Need what?"

Arthur with half closed eyes grinned saying, "I need to…be pampered!"

Merlin burst out laughing. Arthur had added another word to their own private vocabulary.

They heard the breakfast platters being placed on the sideboard in the antechamber but neither was yet ready to get out of bed. "I'd like to be pampered every morning," Arthur whispered. "Thank you!"

"Only when you deserve it…Talk about deserving something, let's go off with the horses later on. It will be good to get away from the castle for an hour or two. You've been cooped up here for the last ten days…time to let the wind blow the cobwebs away."

Arthur was thoughtful then he said, "By the way, Merlin, did you ever find out anything more about that Sir Reginald?"

Slipping his feet into his house shoes, Merlin mentioned that he had noticed the knight in blue and cream was still around. He shook his head, he really didn't want to waste time on a silent knight who was obeying social etiquette of the court so it was strange that he had caught his attention in the first place. "I know nothing more, just what Gawaine managed to find out. He was with Lord Peter, Duke Mumford for three years but now he has no affiliations with any duke. I just hope he doesn't intend to approach you to consider him as a Knight of Camelot."

As Merlin threw him his dressing robe, Arthur said, "Well…he acquitted himself well in the tournament."

"Yes…but there is still something about him which doesn't ring true. I'm going to keep my eye on him until we see his backside as he rides out of Camelot."

"Not very generous, are you this morning?"

"Excuse me? Not generous, didn't hear you complaining earlier on!"

Arthur grinned as he sat down at the table as Merlin disappeared into the antechamber to collect their breakfasts. He thought, 'No, I certainly didn't as, My Love, I was more than satisfied!'

-0-0-

Mid afternoon, Merlin realised that any opportunity to ride was long gone. Arthur had a full day of visiting ahead. So, he took himself off to Gaius's. "Gaius, do you feel like a couple of hours in the woods? We can potter around and check for herbs."

"Where's Arthur?"

"Closeted with various members of royal families. I think two kings are departing tomorrow then the others a few days later. Michael and Rys are here for another week."

"Prince Michael and Prince Rhys to you, Merlin," said Gaius laughing, as he collected a basket as a walk in the woods might turn up some mushrooms and he was rather partial to them.

Merlin smiled, "I'm always very careful when people are around. Imagine, if I called him Michael to his face…dungeons for me for insubordination and disrespect of a royal personage!"

Gaius said, "No different than the pages and squires addressing you as Sir. It's a respect paid to you as manservant of the king."

They were walking across the courtyard and passed a group of six year squires and Erik, Rook's young brother called out "Good Afternoon, Merlin. Good Afternoon, Sir!" Gaius nodded at him. It started a chain reaction as each of them had to repeat the greeting.

"As I was saying," continued Gaius with a big grin, "It's a respect paid to you as the royal manservant."

Merlin glanced up and saw a squire in blue and cream crossing the courtyard. He nodded at him but the boy dropped his head and continued. Merlin thought, 'So, Sir Reginald is still around.'

The couple of hours spent with Gaius in the woods were perfect. He found his mushrooms and some herbs and Merlin was able to unburden his mind about the strange knight. Gaius listened intently and then said, "Maybe, he was feeling ill at ease and trying very hard to fit in with the other knights. Have you anything concrete about him?"

Merlin shrugged his shoulders saying, "No!"

"Well, trust your feelings as you usually pick up on things, others would miss. But, don't do anything foolhardy in finding out about him. Hopefully, within the next couple of days, he'll be on his way."

…but he wasn't!

-0-0-

Arthur opted for a private supper and he had Merlin invite the usual group. So, Spenser, Simon and Gawaine joined them to rehash the last ten days. Spenser was still on a high as Runner Up in the Sword Event and Gawaine was still experiencing twinges in his shoulder if he forgot and turned too suddenly. Arthur had laughed at him, "Gawaine, Old Man, your age is showing."

Gawaine retorted with, "Well, it takes one to know one," and the others broke into laughter. "I see our strange knight is still with us. Maybe he has no where to go and hopes to be adopted by Merlin as Treva was."

Punching him lightly in his good arm, Merlin said, "I hardly think that I am in need of any more adult male companions, or does one of you intend to step down and make way for Sir Reginald?" He smiled at the group and they all shook their heads.

Arthur was very quiet, but then he said, "I wasn't going to mention it but Sir Reginald has requested a private audience with me on Wednesday afternoon. He supposedly has some information which would be beneficial to me. The subject of which he is unwilling to share with anyone, even Sir Leon, stating that it is personal."

"Send him to the back of the line! There's protocol to be followed and he needs to respect it. He could at least give one of your minions an idea of what he wishes to request of you," Spenser insisted. "If you like I will approach him and tell him so."

Merlin looked at Arthur but saw that he was intrigued by the man's unwillingness to follow the rules. "What if he really has something important to say?"

"Like a knife in the chest?" asked Simon.

"I'll have Merlin with me."

"Great!" Merlin said, "Two knives in two chests. Arthur, why not just ignore the request."

Arthur shrugged. The letter he had received from Sir Reginald made reference to a maternal family matter. He might tell Merlin but he intended to keep everyone else in the dark.

The conversation drifted back to the tournament and Rhys's horses. Gawaine said, "By the way, how is the colt from Curig which Rhys brought down for you?"

"He's got the look of his father and I have great things planned if he matures as promised."

Merlin turned off the horse talk and asked Spenser if he was going to take time off for a holiday. Shrugging, Spenser said that he had thought that Simon and he might visit his sister-in-law's family on the coast.

Merlin laughed telling him, "If you want a manservant for the duration I'm sure that Arthur could permit me a few days to visit the seaside." Spenser smiled but was non committal.

They were all tired and ready to turn in early. Gawaine complaining that he must be getting old as the thought of having to break in a new squire as the one he had had for the last two years was now in his final year and a candidate for the knighthood, was annoying. "Arthur, how about you and I share Merlin? I'd let you have him eighty percent of the time."

Arthur laughed saying, "No way, but you know the upcoming squires and if you see one whom you think you could work with, with a modicum of effort, let me know and I'll suggest to Sir Melor the Squire Master that…" he paused,"…that he doesn't let you have him. It's part of your job to mentor a squire. I'm sure you'll get on fine with your new one."

"No having him attending you in the tavern and soliciting for you…" Merlin went to add more but was stopped mid-sentence by Gawaine.

"Merlin, honestly you are a man after my own heart. I will have a little chat with the Sir Melor and have him suggest a squire with those attributes."

Arthur laughed at him. He stood and the others left. Merlin and he walked through the adjoining door into their chambers, Merlin locking it after them.

-0-0-

Thomas had been in and the room was ready for them to retire. Arthur refused to let Merlin help him with his clothes saying that he'd manage fine by himself.

Merlin then knew that there was something on his mind. He said nothing until he had checked all the doors and slid in beside Arthur.

"All right, what is it? Something is up. You've something on your mind and can't decide whether I should know about it. Remember that a problem shared is a problem halved. Come on, Arthur, it's me Merlin!"

Arthur propped himself on his elbow and handed Merlin the small sheet of parchment that he had hidden under his pillow. He said nothing, but just nodded that Merlin should read it.

Merlin did in silence. He reread it and folding it, returned it to Arthur. Arthur had watched him intently as he read it. He then slipped it back under his pillow and lay down next to Merlin fiddling with the laces on his night clothes. "Not like you to be so quiet, no comments?"

Merlin heart had dropped as he read the note. The words your maternal family member had stood out, putting him on the offensive. He knew from experience that Arthur's love for and lack of information about his mother burned a hole in his heart. How this man had chosen those simple words was worrisome. Arthur would be drawn to him like a moth to a flame and Merlin knew what had happened to the proverbial moth.

"When will you be seeing him?"

"Leon gave me the note and I told him to arrange a meeting within the next three days, the later the better. I'll need to get my mind straight. He said that the chap was insistent that it was a personal matter which he was unwilling to disclose to Leon but he had been willing to give me a sealed note."

"Are you sure that you want to see him?"

"What choice do I have?"

…and Merlin thought, 'Refuse to see him…' but he knew that where his mother was concerned, Arthur deprived of information about her most of his life was already hoping for something concrete.

"Wouldn't you want news about your father, Merlin?"

"Naturally, I would but only from a reliable source, I wouldn't want to rely on someone who appeared out of the blue."

"But Geoffrey will be able to vouch if what he says is true. We know the man's name and his former affiliation so finding out about him should not be that difficult."

"Arthur, stop trying to convince yourself. You have already made your mind up about seeing him."

"But, I want you to agree…"

"Why, so that I can pick up the broken pieces?" Merlin cringed he found it hard to believe that he had actually said that.

Arthur looked at him disbelievingly, "Well, now that I know how you feel, I will ask someone else to be with me during the audience." Arthur turned his back on Merlin and pulled the covers up over his ears.

Propping himself up on his elbow, Merlin tried to explain. He moved the quilt so that Arthur would hear and said, "Arthur, you know what I meant. I don't want you getting hurt. I know that Uther should have given you all the information he had about your mother but he didn't. He was in the wrong but that doesn't mean that anyone claiming to have information can be trusted. By all means, listen to the man and have Geoffrey check him out but take everything he says with a grain of salt. I'll stand by you as long as you want me to but I don't want to see you hurt by some charlatan of a knight who might be up to no good."

He felt the tension going out of Arthur's back as he rolled back towards him. "Merlin, you have had Hunith all your life; you remember her hugs and kisses, how she looked at you when you said or did something clever, the feeling that you have absolute trust in her and that she would never turn away from you regardless of what you did. Do you deny me that same pleasure?"

Merlin felt badly, everything which Arthur said was true. He had been one of the lucky ones to be raised by a loving mother but deep down he knew that some people take advantage of a needy person and this was the one area in which the monarch could be described as being needy.

"There is a big empty space in my life where my mother should be and try as hard as I can there is something missing. Even a few little stories about her growing up or how she felt when she knew I was on the way, would satisfy me…little things which my father refused to share with me. I have the right to know, Merlin."

Merlin put his arm around Arthur saying, "We'll do this together. You can meet him and be alone with him whenever you wish but I will be nearby should you need me."

Arthur was restless during the night and on more than one occasion, Merlin had heard him call for Ygraine.

-0-0-

Once all the members of the royal families had left Camelot. Life resumes its normal pace, squires and pages were back at their lessons and training. Council meetings were scheduled not to conflict with training sessions and Arthur's mind wandered to hunting. He had yet to meet with Sir Reginald.

Merlin and Gawaine had been watching Reginald. He still seemed quite at home in the castle and ate all his meals with the knights. His squire and manservant were accepted in the servants' quarters. He did not approach Arthur and just seemed to be biding his time. Merlin noticed that he seems to have been checking out the castle and referred to man and maid servants by their names. He'd curried favour with the grooms and Gawaine once overheard him praising one of the stable boys for the excellent care which he was giving to his mare.

-0-0-

One afternoon, Arthur sent word to the falconer that he wished to hunt and for the man to choose an assortment of falcons for him to fly. The usual bird for the monarch was the gyrfalcon. However Arthur also liked goshawks and naturally merlins which were usually flown by women and children because of their size.

Merlin reminded him that they had promised young Treva another outing with the birds so Randall arrived soon after lunch with one excited boy. They mounted up and rode to the meadows. Treva thrilled as on his wrist he had one of the merlins. It always fascinated him that the bird was so relaxed even though it must have know that it was going to fly free. Arthur led the way followed by the falconer with his monarch's white gyrfalcon. This bird was fifteen years old and had belonged to Uther, while Arthur as prince had flown a smaller peregrine. The gyrfalcon is a large bird weighing about three pounds, about two feet long with a wingspan of four feet, and if truth be told it was a little terrifying to Treva. However, he was thrilled when Arthur let it go and it raced horizontally across the landscape finally swooped on a large grouse. One of the falconer's boys raced over to stand by the kill until the falconer arrived. The bird was encouraged to return to the falconer's wrist, while the grouse taken back to the grooms who stayed with the horses.

Treva was thrilled when Merlin came over with another merlin on his wrist. A merlin was a smaller falcon weighing around eight ounces with a two foot wingspan. Treva stayed perfectly still, paying attention to Merlin's directions and finally released his and she took off across the meadow to the treetops. Merlin also released his and the two birds hunted as a pair bringing down a pigeon. The falconer nodded appreciatively as seeing merlins hunt in pairs was rare.

By then Treva was jumping all over the place, "Let's do it again, Merlin."

Arthur smiled, remembering his first hunting experiences. He was so impressed that a bird kept in captivity could be released and would return to the wrist of its own free will. As a child, he had also started hunting with a merlin. He smiled at Merlin and nodded his head so the falcon was again placed on Treva's wrist and this time flying alone she caught a songbird. "If you want to get good at this and you do well in your regular lessons, I will see that you are allowed to spend time learning more about falcons and hunting with them," he said.

Treva smiled at him happily, thrilled with the prospect of more times spent in the open with the falcons. Merlin laughed and said to Randall. "Hope you're up to date on all things falcon as I have a feeling you will again be answering a lot of questions tonight."

Arthur continued hunting and by the time they left the area they had three brace of grouse, two brace of pigeons and one songbird. Treva was thrilled; he rode next to Arthur chatting about hunting with birds. "But what happens if the bird doesn't come back and just sits in a tree preening itself or it flies away never to be seen again?"

Merlin laughed, Arthur was going to be exhausted by the time they got home.

"Sooner or later the bird will get hungry and return to the falconer or the person who was flying it. They aren't allowed to eat what they catch just have a little mouthful before the falconer retrieves them. They are fed properly when they return to the mews…and if one flies away then the falconer is blamed for not training it sufficiently before taking it out hunting. Isn't that right, Larry?"

The falconer nodded, "Yes, Sire! They have to be trustworthy before we let them go on their own."

"I'd come back!" said Treva, "I wouldn't want to be on my own."

Arthur smiled and nodded, "Don't worry, we'll never leave you on your own. Now, how about we have a little race up the hill to that big tree? I'll give you a head start." Popper was away in a flash and Arthur managed to arrive second by holding a rather annoyed Mulgan to a slow canter.

"Merlin, I won, I really did!" Then he smiled up at Arthur saying, "Even though you only cantered slowly, Popper and I got there first. We did, didn't we, Merlin?"

"That you did, now settle Popper down and we'll make our way up through the town to the castle. Remember to thank Larry for letting you fly one of the merlins and answering your questions."

Treva turned to the falconer and said, "Larry, thank you for sharing your merlin with me and helping me understand more about the birds. You have a very nice job!"

Arthur and Merlin looked at him like doting parents, as their ward had shown good manners and behaved exceptionally well.

Larry smiled saying, "Anytime, young Master…"

As they walked up the steps, Treva slid his hand into Arthur's and said, "Can we do it again tomorrow?"

Arthur said, "Sorry no, I have someone to meet with tomorrow, so I won't have time. Maybe another time…"

Merlin came crashing to earth; that someone was Sir Reginald.