(This was going to be SOOOO different than how it turned out)

{Based loosely on the song 21 Guns by Green Day} I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING BUT THE PLOT!

I walk into my Father's classroom for the last time in my high school years, and in a bad mood. I just got a pity invite to Missy's pool party, just because she wanted Lucas to come. It makes me so mad how she seems to like him JUST because I like him... how he makes my knees weak just by looking at me... how when he touches me I melt... how I think about him all the time...

"Earth to Riley.. Come in Riley" Maya says, breaking me out of my thoughts.

"Hmm? Oh yea... what's up?"

"So you want to borrow that bikini still for the party?"

"Uhmm... sure, sure." I say, but Maya knows that something is up.

"Riles, whats wrong?" Maya asks, concerned. I don't want to tell her, but I know that she will understand.

"I'm just so fed up with Missy! She seems to like Lucas JUST because I like him..." I sigh.

"You know, Riles, Lucas doesn't like Missy. He likes you! Oh my god he let you KISS him for hell's sake!" Maya says. I know that she is lying. I mean, the kiss didn't even last a second. He couldn't have stopped it. He just didn't act grossed out because his friends were around. I just can't seem to shake the feeling...no. KNOWING. I know that they don't care but just pretend to. These suspicions have been in my head for a while.

"Maya, it's been FIVE YEARS, and it hasn't happened again. Okay?"

"Okay, Okay. I got you, let's just listen to your dad's final lecture... Well, school lecture anyway, and then we can go home, get ready, go to Missy's house for her stupid party. Yea?"

"Yea." I agree. But before we listen to my dad's final lecture of the year, Missy gets up and walks over to me.

"Why are you even here? It's pretty obvious that everyone is only nice to you because they pity you." She looks over her shoulder at Lucas. "Especially Lucas. No one is as pathetic as you." I just look down. "Jeez! What a loser you are Matthews. Not even defending yourself. Why don't you just die already? No one would notice." She giggles a bit like she just told a joke so no one would question her. She walked back to her desk. Before it officially begins, out of the corner of my eye, I see Lucas staring at me. But Missy is staring at him, too. I turn my attention to the board reluctantly. As my father's lecture begins, I see through the corner of my eye, that Missy is STILL looking at Lucas. Wow. This is gonna be a long day.

After the most boring forty minutes of the day, I head to lunch. I grab my tray and sit down at my usual table, and poke the food with my fork. After a while, Maya and Lucas sit next to me, and Farkle sits across the table. I don't greet them or even look up.

"Riley, is something up?" Lucas says, "genuinely" concerned. I would usually immediately deny the accusation, but today I just shrugged. It's not even just the Lucas thing anymore. It's the fact that Missy will never stop. I can't deal with her and all of those other people who set me back. 'My usual peppiness is not even real.' I realize. It's just an act. I convinced everyone else... I even convinced myself. I need to stop pretending and being optomistic. My friends are from pity, Lucas doesn't REALLY like me, he pities me. No one really loves me. They just keep me around because they must. But they won't have to deal with me much longer. They can have good lives without the burden that is Riley Matthews. My mind is made up.

"Riley!" Lucas and Farkle yell. I snap out of my trance and hold up my fork and look at it. My plan will take place tonight. But for now, I have to make it not look suspicious.

"S-sorry." Nice job. NOT! I mentally face-palm. But who cares. They are just pretending to care. Lunch is pretty much over, so I pick up my full tray and dump it in the garbage can. I speed walk out, eager to make my plan and carry it out.

During free period, I come up with my plan.

First, I tell Maya that my parents are driving me, and she can head over by herself. Next, I tell my parents that I am meeting Maya downstairs. After telling them that, I'll grab a sharp kitchen knife, instead of the glass I've been using to cut myself whenever I needed relief. It is getting dull. Before I go, I'll leave a note on my bed explaining. When I leave, I'll head into the park,under the cover of darkness. I'll sit under the willow that I went to whenever I needed to think when I was little. Then, I'll bring the knife to my neck, or maybe wrists, and then...

"Riley, it's time to go home."Maya said.

"Hey, Maya. My mom insisted on driving me, and I know that you have the swimsuit in your bag, so just give it to me now, and I'll meet you at the party!" I try to say enthusiastically.

"Uhhhh fine, fine. I'll see you in seven hours then."

"Cool" I say. She hands me the bikini, and heads out.

~Time Skip~

After I get home, I go straight into my room. My mom and Auggie don't even look at me. I lock the door, and put on a pair of jeans and a navy sweatshirt, take off my jewelry, (including the friendship ring) And slip on my black sneakers. I listen to sad songs on the radio, and look out of the bay window. The skies are darkening, It should be clear until nine-ish. That's when Missy's party is supposed to start. And when mine will end.

Thunderstorm clouds are visible in the distance, heading for New York. I smirk. Missy's party will be a disaster even without me there. I start my letter. It is just a simple one, telling them that life will be better without me, and that they should be lucky that I decided this mostly on my own, with the help of Missy.

At eight thirty, I tell my parents that Maya is waiting downstairs, and head out. All I get are some uninterested 'have funs' and stuff. I make sure to grab the knife, and head to the park in the twilight.

I find my way to the weeping willow that kept me company when no one else would. I look up through the long, flowing tresses and see a bright waxing crescent moon, bathing my body in silver light. This tree is right next to a trail that cuts through the middle of the park, but no one should be on it until tomorrow. I sit at the base, looking at the silver looking blade that rests in my small hands. A fractured life, written with lies and deceit, is about to finish. I hold the blade to my left wrist, and cut in. I cry out in pain, but it is almost done. I just need to cut the other.

I put the knife in my left hand, the wrist gushing warm, sticky blood. I cut into my right wrist, an drop the knife. I am bleeding out fast, and I should be dead in about ten minutes. I lean back and close my eyes, thinking about the new life I could be born into.

~Lucas's PoV~

"Mom I have to go! I'm already late!" I yell at my mom while rushing to the door. I have my blue and gold board shorts on, and a Hurley T-shirt.

"Okay have fun! Take the short cut through the park to make it faster!" She kisses my forehead, and I dash out the door.

As my flip-flops smack the ground, all I can think about is Riley. She seems so sad, and is always distant. Maya, Farkle and I have been trying to figure out why. My main suspicion is Missy. Also, I think that she was cyber bullied. About a month ago, she deleted her Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Vine and Youtube accounts, and never told us why. I'm worried about her. I really like her. I mean...she is everything to me. I would do anything to see the old Riley's smile, hear her real laugh instead of the fake one, and...and kiss her again. A real kiss. One with tongue and fire and passion. I harden slightly just thinking about it. I shake my head, but another thought comes to mind.

"I love her." Three simple words that have lost their real meaning over the years, now are clear. What I feel for her, it's not just a crush. My cheeks redden and I go harder. I can't walk around New York like that though, so I think about collage and Missy. That makes me go back to normal VERY fast. I make my way down the trail, and am about to pass the weeping willow, when something catches my eye. A hint of silver. I go over to investigate, and what I see kills me a little on the inside. Riley is lying on the trunk of the tree, blood covering her wrists and hands. A bloody kitchen knife lies next to her.

"Riley!" I yell, dropping to my knees next to her. Her eyes crack open and widen in surprise. Before I even touch her, I whip out my phone to dial 911. Before I finish, her bloody hand reaches up and touches mine softly. I know what she is trying to do, and I won't let her. I pull away and put in the last "1" (No pun intended, seriously.)

"Nine one one what your emergency?" The receptionist asks. I explain, and she said that an ambulance should be there in three minutes. I don't know if she will last that long. I whip off my shirt, and tear it in half. I wrap it tightly around her wrists. She is deathly pale from blood loss.

"L-Luca-as?" She says. I turn to her quickly. Before she talks, I interrupt her.

"WHY DID YOU DO THIS?" I scream, eyes full of angry tears. "I- WE NEED YOU RILEY!" I bring my voice down to a whisper. "Who made you do this? I will destroy them." I clench my fists. Her eyes are sad. But are also closing fast.

~Riley's PoV~ (sorry for all the pov switches, but it makes the story work.)

As my eyes are sliding closed, I hear Lucas utter three words so sincere that I instantly regret the attempted suicide. But then I don't regret it again, remembering all of Missy's taunting and threats. But Lucas says the words that have never felt more right.

"I love you." And I black out.

~Maya's PoV~

I was at Missy's party, and it was starting to thunder and rain a bit. 'Where is Riley, she's never late, much less by an hour...' I think, looking around for my tall, brunette best friend. A vibration in my pocket alerts me to an incoming call. I pull out my phone. It's Lucas.

"Sup Ranger Rick." Out of all the nicknames I gave him in seventh grade only that one and Huckleberry stuck.

"Maya..." He says, I can tell he's crying. I move into a small quiet closet.

"What's wrong Lucas?" I say, curious and concerned.

"Riley attempted suicide." I cover my mouth, tears pricking my eyes.

"Where are you?" I choke out.

"Central park, by the willow. The ambulance just pulled up. She tried to slit her wrists. If I hadn't been using the shortcut, she would be dead right now. I'm going to keep talking to you in the ambulance."

"I'm driving to the hospital now." I say as I hop into my car. I put my phone on speaker.

"Okay, you're on speaker. I have a question for you. Why didn't you drive to the party?"

"Why is that important?" Lucas says angrily.

"Just answer the fucking question!" I yell into the speaker. I'm halfway to the hospital.

"Tell me why you want to know." I sigh.

"I want to know what happened to make it so that you saved my best friend's life." I say.

"The windshield was cracked, and the car was in the shop getting fixed." He says. "We're at the hospital."

I am pulling up to the street. I pull into the parking lot and park my car. I jump out, and can see Lucas jump out of the back of the ambulance. I sprint over to them.

"Lucas, how is she? Wait. Did you call her dad?"

"One, I don't know. Two, yes, he's on his way." I relax, but then I see her. She is ashen gray, and she is hooked up to an oxygen machine. They wheel her inside, and put her in the ICU. Now all we can do is wait.

~Lucas's PoV~

*Time Skip two weeks*

Riley is fine. She told us that Missy's bullying led her to believe that no one loved or cared for her. She had taken up cutting herself about a month or so before the attempt. We made her swear to never try that again.

"Lucas?" We were alone at her house, laying on her bed, watching Frozen.

"Yea Riles?" I say with a grin. She blushes.

"Before I blacked out, you told me that you loved me... Is that true?"

"Yes." I say without hesitation. To make my point clear, I kiss her. The real kiss I was thinking about the day I found her. She wraps her arms loosely around my neck, and I slide my tongue over her bottom lip, asking to enter. She obliges, and I'm sucked into the best (and first) open mouthed kiss of my life. We wrestle for a second, before she lets me explore. My arms have made their way to her hips, sliding onto her butt. She shivers, and I smile into the kiss. I pull back, and look into her eyes, and can tell that she wants me to go all the way.

"Tell me if it's too much, alright?" She nods. I attack her neck, leaving hot, wet kisses in a path to her collar bone. I gently pull off her shirt. I bite down on the soft skin under her collarbone, leaving a hickey. She pulls my shirt off, and runs her hands over my abs, until she gets to the waistline of my shorts. She unbuttons them, and slides them off. My dick is rock solid, and she isn't even out of her skirt. I slip off her skirt, and kiss her bare stomach. I take off her bra, and squeeze her breasts. The sound is music to my ears. I slide out of my boxers, exposing myself to her, getting ready to claim her as my own. After all that's happened, I'm glad to have her here, alive and safe with me.