Title: Red Roses and Other Clichés

Author: Pegasus153

Rating: PG for now

Category: Romance/Humor maybe a little bit of angst

Spoilers: I don't think anything specific, but to be safe the whole second season

Summary: Fed up with Valentine's day, Chloe resolves to abstain from the whole thing. Lex finds out and decides to try and change her mind.

Disclaimer: Smallville, all the characters and everything aren't mine. Too bad.

Feedback: Please. I dunno how good this will be. It's just fun.

A/N: I don't know where this idea came from, cause it's May not February, but what the hey... here it is.

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Chloe stared balefully into her coffee cup. Valentine's day was nearly upon her, and Chloe was thoroughly digested.

All the sappy poems and love-struck sweethearts were beginning to irritate her. She couldn't go anywhere without being assaulted by bright pink and red hearts, little jingles about love, and flowers everywhere.

Even the Talon, her usual haven, had been transformed into Cloud Nine. Lana had gone over board with the decorations. There were hearts and streamers everywhere. She had even devised a promotional gig, wherein a person could by a paper heart, and put someone's name on it. The heart got stuck up on the wall, and the person whose name it was got free coffee.

Chloe resented that no one bothered to give her a heart. Not even Clark or Pete, who knew how much she liked free coffee. And therein lay the real problem, Chloe realized.

She had no one, and Hallmark holidays like this simply served as a reminder. Lana had Clark although the two denied it vehemently, Pete had that new girl, Ginnie what's-her-name. Even her father was into the swing of things, picking up a date from some company benefit, and going to a movie on February 14th.

All Chloe wanted to do was disappear until the flowers, streamers and paper hearts were gone. Unfortunately, the most annoying trait of the smitten was complete cluelessness when it came to those... less fortunate. None of her friends were really aware of how she felt.

Lana drifted over to Chloe with a pot of coffee. She smiled widely.

"Isn't this great?" Lana asked, pouring Chloe a refill without being told. " The valentine's day promotion is bringing in a lot of business!"

Chloe managed a credible smile. "I'm glad. Always nice when business is booming."

Lana nodded. "Ooh, here comes the other owner. He should be pleased, don't you think?" Lana glanced from Lex to Chloe.

Chloe shrugged, watching Lex maneuver around lovesick teenagers to where Chloe and Lana were talking.

"Lana, Chloe." He said curtly. "Can I get a cup of coffee?" He asked Lana, as he sat down beside Chloe.

Lana nodded. "Sure. Be right back!" She hurried off to find a mug.

"I'm kind of working on something." Chloe said, in a not so subtle effort to encourage Lex to find a new table.

"I won't bother you." Lex replied, picking up on the hint, and choosing to ignore it. Chloe was intriguing, and Lex figured a little intrigue would do wonders for him right then.

Lana returned with Lex's coffee, and then moved over to the counter to get someone's bill. Lex took a sip, observing Chloe typing something into her laptop. He waited until she seemed engrossed, then asked, "What are you working on?"

She looked up glaring. She rolled her eyes. "Hello? Didn't I just say..."

"That you're working on something." Lex finished for her. "You didn't actually ask me to leave."

"Please leave." Chloe said immediately, before turning back to the computer.

"Story for the Torch?" Lex asked calmly, ignoring her command, and sipping more coffee.

"If I tell you will you leave me alone?" She demanded, looking up again.

Lex smiled. "Maybe."

"It's a filler article for the torch, okay? Clark didn't finish what I asked him to, so I had extra space on page three."

"What's the article about?" Lex asked.

Chloe glared, but seeing the unperturbed look in Lex's face, she realized he wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. She snapped the laptop closed and met his gaze.

"Why are you bothering me?" She asked. "Don't you have some corporation to take over or something?"

Lex smiled. "It's been a long day. I needed a little amusement."

Chloe snorted. "Glad to have been of assistance."

"So the article?" Lex probed, refusing to let it drop. He was beginning to sense that Chloe didn't want to tell him what it was about and that made him more intrigued.

Chloe sighed. He was as persistent as she was sometimes. "Valentine's day. Okay. Go home now, you've had your fun."

"Valentine's Day?" Lex asked, assuming an appropriately disbelieving look. "Miss Chloe Sullivan stooping to romance and mush? I never would have guessed you for the type."

Chloe shrugged. "Well, I am. So there."

"Let's see." Lex said, and laid his hands on the laptop and pulled it over before Chloe could stop him. He flipped the top up.

The title heading blazed out, 'Why Valentine's Day Should Be Outlawed', and below it there was a short list of classic Valentine's day clichés.

*Dozen red roses- S.W.A.K.- Paper hearts- Cheesy poems about someone's attributes- Bryan Adam's 'Everything I Do'- Significant other's doing lousy kareoke to prove their love*

Lex looked up at Chloe with a bemused expression. Chloe waited for Lex to say something that would send her under the table in embarrassment. He glanced up at her with a twinkle of mischief in his eye.

He cleared his throat several times, and in exaggerated motions, using two fingers, proceeded to type something onto the computer.

Curiosity stopped Chloe from a scathing remark. She pulled the laptop across the table and looked at the screen. Underneath her list, Lex had added:

Cheesy romantic movies

Chloe laughed out loud. "Hmm. Good one." She said. "How about senseless dancing in the rain?" Lex nodded, and Chloe typed it down.

"Candle-lit dinners." Lex offered. Chloe dutifully typed. "Expectations of fabulous presents, improbable breathy declarations of love, eyelash fluttering and puppy-dog looks." Lex paused as Chloe typed.

When she got it all down, she looked up at Lex surprised. She hadn't really given much thought to other people who might hate Valentine's day as much as she did. But she realized that Lex must have an awful time of it. Every girl he ever met probably dated him for what he could give her.

She sat thinking about annoying things like unrequited love. Clark, she saw was mooning over Lana again. He thought he was subtle, but anyone could tell. Chloe gritted her teeth. "Definitely puppy-dog looks." And she underlined the words on her computer.

Lex followed the direction of her gaze and smiled understandingly. He knew better then to say anything, but Chloe caught the look.

"What?" She demanded, daring him to say anything about Clark. "I'm going to go. Thanks for the help with the article.

Lex nodded, and watched as she got up and walked away.