peter.

He's not really her type.

(But then again, and maybe she's mean to think so, but she think he's nobody's type.)

He isn't but he's quiet, and shy, and somewhat adorable even if she can't quite explain why. He's also good in class, even if his friends are better, and she sees that he's more than good in Transfiguration. He simply let his friends take the spotlight, because he's that kind of a boy. But his smile is pretty enough, and he manages to make her smile too when they have to work together in Charms. That's probably why he asks her, because she's the only girl kind enough not to ignore him.

It's the end of third year and Lily Evans says yes to an afternoon in Hogsmeade with Peter Pettigrew because he has a nice smile and she can't find the nerve to say no. Maybe it'll be fun, she thinks as she gets ready.

They have a Butterbeer and they wander around the little town and he let her do most of the talking but, in the end, she enjoys herself more than she thought she would. Peter even buys her some sweets and tells her about his friends. She doesn't really like them, those arrogant boys who think themselves better than everyone, but she can understand why he loves them so much. And then he takes her to the Shierking Shack with a small smirk on his lips she doesn't quite understand. She doesn't ask, thought.

He doesn't even dare trying to kiss her and, when they're back at the castle, there's not disappointment in his eyes when she tells him it was nice, but that's all. There won't be a second date, but that doesn't surprise him. Instead, he thanks her for the good time, and smiles that sweet smile of his.

Lily doesn't know what she expected when she said yes, but she realises she had fun that day. That Marauder, she decides, isn't half bad. She could be friends with this one.


sirius.

It doesn't come as a surprise, not really. He says some joke in Astronomy once, an actual funny joke that actually makes her laugh, and she turns her head to smile at him. He smiles back and winks.

That's how it begins.

It doesn't take her long to realise he keeps making jokes when she's around just to have another reaction from her, speaking louder and looking at her in the corner of his eye. She finds herself laughing more than once, hiding her smiles behind a book and biting her cheeks not to make a sound. That's enough for him thought; he's delighted at the sight of Lily Evans amused by a Marauder.

She doesn't understand why he's doing it, because he could have any girl he wanted. Maybe she's a challenge, maybe all he sees in her is a game. She quickly realises she doesn't care; he's a game too.

They flirt for the fun of it and, even if her cheeks are red sometimes, there are no butterflies in her stomach. She's not in love with Sirius Black. She's not even sure she has a crush on him, even if her friends say so. But he's fun to be around, and it's more than enough. He keeps making jokes and she keeps laughing, and that's all.

They're waiting in front of the Charms classroom one day, and she leans again the wall as she hugs her books to her chest, as usual. He comes and leans too, slightly above her, with one hand next to her head on the wall. They smile.

"So, Evans..."

Maybe he wants to make another joke. Maybe he wants to end the game and ask her on a date. She doesn't know, because someone bumps into him at that moment, and he almost loses his balance when his hand slips from the wall. When he looks above his shoulder, his best friend stares at him. If looks could kill...

She doesn't hear from him in three days, he doesn't smile back.

And then, one day at breakfast, "Prongs won't speak to me as long as I speak to you so..."

She doesn't quite understand, and she says so. He only rolls his eyes, telling her how blind chicks are sometimes. She doesn't understand that either.

(Years later, she wears a white dress and a pretty ring is at her finger, and she finally asks him. He pretends he has forgotten, pretends he has to think hard about that day, and he dramatically rolls his eyes because it no longer matters.)

(He would have asked her on a date.)

(She probably would have said yes.)


remus.

Lily Evans and Remus Lupin are meant to be.

That's at least what everybody says. Because they're not, not really. They work together because they're Prefects and they study together because teachers think they don't spend enough time together already. They have this big Charms essay they write together, and she choses him in Defense Against the Dark Arts when they have to make boy-girl duos.

If Lily had to sum up her fifth year, it would be "that year I spent with Remus".

It's no surprise they become close friends.

It's no surprise people see them as more than friends. Mostly because of the time they spend together, but also because of her habit to lean against his shoulder and his to put that one rebellious lock of hair back behind her ear. She has to admit it, they probably look bloody adorable from the outside, especially when he gives her chocolates.

(He gives her chocolates every opportunity he gets; fifth year is also the year Lily Evans gains ten pounds.)

If she's honest with herself, maybe she has a tiny little crush on Remus Lupin. If she's honest with herself, it's not that tiny. She loves his smile, his golden hair, the way he voice reaches high octaves when they argue about one thing or another. She knows there are things about her he loves too, because he looks at her like they describe it in the stories.

She read those books.

But Remus is Bingley where she's Elizabeth, and she knows her Darcy is out there.

Still, she accepts when he asks her on a date. Not an afternoon together in Hogsmeade but a real date, with flowers and a nice table at the Three Broomstick and holding her hand when he makes her laugh.

He kisses her in an empty corridor, and it's sweet and soft just like him. It's also how she realises she doesn't like him that way.

Maybe he realises it too, maybe not. It doesn't stop him from stealing kisses between classes, grinning and breathless. They keep it secret, for reasons she doesn't understand, but she feels like a forbidden fruit and it thrills her more than it should.

But Remus isn't Darcy, and she gets bored.

Remus is also a sweetheart, and he understands.

"You were never meant to be mine anyway."


james.

She doesn't know how it happens, but one day at breakfast James Potter sits in front of her, smiles at her, and she realises she doesn't hate him. Did she ever really hate him anyway? She can't tell, and the question confuses her, and she stares at him for way too long. His cheeks turn pink.

He makes a stupid joke in History of Magic one day, and nobody laughs but her. It's so loud everybody looks at her as she slides down her chair and hides her face with the collar of her shirt. He stares at her with big eyes instead of being his usual smug self. The joke wasn't even funny.

From there, it's like Sirius all over again. He tries some jokes, tests her reaction, has a small smile when he manages to make her laugh. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Until he decides to sit next to her in Charms, whispering jokes and snarky remarks in her ear so she has to bite on her hand not to laugh. He looks proud, then, but not in an arrogant way. It's new.

It's like Peter all over again when she tells herself that, yes, Potter has a nice smile. A crooked smile, but nice nonetheless. His nose is crooked too from a Quidditch match gone wrong, and it makes his face funny. Not in a bad way. Because James Potter has a nice smile and he's handsome.

When she learns about him being the Head Boy, she's not even upset - okay, she really thought Remus would get the badge, and that's disappointing. But she doesn't mind. She's actually quite happy about it, and that's when she realises James Potter is her friend. Or something like that.

They start spending more and more time together, planning schedules, counting points, organizing week-ends at Hogsmeade. She falls asleep on the Common Room's sofa, exhausted, more than once and always wakes up with a blanket around her shoulders and a sleepy smile on her lips.

It's like Remus all over again when they spend all their time together, studying, working, laughing. He falls asleep too, once, and they spend the night cuddling on the sofa. She panics when she's the first to wake up, only to have him hugging her tightly against his chest and kissing the top of her head. She goes back to sleep.

They still argue - a lot - but it's not as violent as it used to be. It usually ends in him apologizing and offering some peace offerings - Sugar Quills, her favourites. She picks fights because she loves to scream at him, loves that he screams back without being afraid to hurt her feelings. Sometimes, she picks fights only because she wants some Sugar Quills. Or just wants to see his face when he's sorry, all puppy eyes and cute pouts.

Their biggest fight is in the middle of the Great Hall. She can't remember what started it, only that they're screaming at each other's face and that nobody else talks, all eyes on them. His face is red and there's a vein pulsing violently on his neck.

"What's the matter with you, Evans?" he finally asks, fed up.

She scoffs, like the question is stupid because the answer should be obvious. "I'm going to Hogsmeade with Marlene this week-end because nobody asked me out, that's the matter!"

It shuts him up, eyes wide. Everything is silent around them if it's not for Marlene muttering something about being good company, thank you very much. But everybody else stares at Lily as she slowly realises what she just said, realises the implications of her words.

She tries to run away.

He catches her by the wrist before she has time to turn around and she crashes again his chest, doesn't have time to punch him before his lips are on hers. It's passionate and hot and it leaves her breathless and warm inside. It's not how first kisses are supposed to go. Forehead against forehead, he brushes his nose against hers. He doesn't smile, his voice deep and husky.

"Go out with me, Evans."

She doesn't answer, she just kisses him.

Peter keeps smiling at her and Sirius keeps making her laugh and Remus keeps doing his homework with her. But it's always with James' hand on his hip, his lips on her neck, his fingers in her hair. He makes her laugh and blush and the butterflies in her stomach have a field day when he looks at her like she's the sun.

She tells him she loves him when sharing Christmas gifts and they make love for the first time after a Quidditch victory.

He still infuriates her, the prat, always will.

But Remus says "you were always meant to be" and she believes him.