Dam Treasure
By Sharan McQuack, Launchpad's wife.
Inspired by Bullwinkle cartoon "Treasure of Monty Zoom". Three cheers for Jay Ward,
he should rest in peace.
This all started when Mr. McDuck bought some old relics in Mexico, including a
treasure map. Mr. McDuck asked Launchpad to help him find the treasure.
"You'll need scuba gear and a sub..." began Launchpad began.
"In the middle of a desert?" Mr. McDuck thundered.
"There's a lake there now. They dammed up a few rivers years ago so they could
use their water for drinking easier...the next thing you know, there was a lake behide
the dam. "Launchpad explained.
"Bother! Then it will take too long and cost too much to find the treasure. And since
it's an ancient treasure, there's always the chance somebody else has found it by now!"
Mr. McDuck complained.
"Launchpad, haven't there been wildfires in that area? And drought? And I know they
want to repair that dam..." I put it.
"So?" Mr. McDuck demanded.
"Water from the dam could put out the fires, end the drought, empty the dam, making
fixing it easier and cheaper...if You used your influence to do so. "I explained.
"Which would make finding that treasure cheaper and easier. I would also be helping
a lot of people by putting out the fires and ending the drought. I'll do it." Mr. McDuck
decided.
As Mr. McDuck used his influence to empty the dam, using the water to put out fires
and end the water shortage caused by the drought, Flinty asked "Why is Scrooge doing
this?" and found out about the treasure map Mr. McDuck found.
It wasn't long until Flinty and the Beagles came to the dam to find the treasure
the fast and easy way: by blowing up the dam. That way they could find the treasure
before our heroes could.
"We don't even have to feel guilty about this! The dam's almost empty, so the
water won't do much harm and they're going to replace the dam anyway!"
Flinty justified.
"You'd blow it up even if the dam was full and brand-new!" Big Time
pointed out.
"True, true. "Flinty replied."As long as I find the treasure first!"
Meanwhile, Mr. McDuck and Launchpad were heading towards the dam.
"The dam isn't empty yet, boss." Launchpad pointed out after Mr. McDuck urged him
to hurry for the umpteenth time.
"I know that, Launchpad!" Mr. McDuck snapped.
"Then why the hurry to get there? We can't look for the treasure until all the water's out,
can we?" Launchpad asked.
"Yes, we can. I double-checked the map. The area the treasure is in is already dry, even
if other areas past the dam still have water in them. And I want to find it before somebody
else does!" Mr. McDuck replied.
"Oh. I'm usually so good with maps, but I didn't know that." Launchpad admitted,
shamefaced.
"I called the people in charge of the dam and I asked! I asked them if any areas of the dam's
bottom were empty yet!" Mr. McDuck said.
As they flew in Launchpad's jet plane closer and closer to the dam, Launchpad saw
something: several people on top of the dam busily doing something.
"Mr. McDuck, are those the people in charge of the dam on top of it?" Launchpad asked.
"WHAT?" Mr. McDuck demanded.
And he grabbed the binoculars and looked closer.
"It's Flintheart and the Beagles! And they have one of their bowling ball bombs and
they are lighting the fuse!" Mr. McDuck screamed.
"Oh, are they?" asked Launchpad.
And he banked the plane down, suddenly.
"LAUNCHPAD!" yelled Mr. McDuck, scared silly.
But Launchpad leveled off and aimed a fire hose at the bomb, extinguishing the fuse.
Then, Launchpad banked the plane and prepared to land. Launchpad landed near the
dam, so near he accidentally-on-purpose soaked Flinty and the Beagles by taxiing thru
a muddy puddle.
Mr. McDuck jumped out of the plane before Launchpad could even stop taxing.
"Guards! Arrest those men! They tried to blow up the dam!" Mr. McDuck yelled
at security guards boredly "guarding" the dam.
"What ARE you talking about Scroogee? You been working too long? WHAT
bomb? These fine gents work as freelance photographers for a newspaper I own.
They're just taking photos of the emptying of the dam. I'm their boss, I'm
supervising their work." Flinty said, smiling smugly.
The bomb was no place to be seen. However, one of the cameras was a LARGE
movie camera. Mr. McDuck guessed that the "camera" was fake and the bomb
was hidden inside a shell. He considered smashing it with his cane, but the fool
bomb might explode….
"Keep up the good work men." Flinty told the Beagles. "You don't mind if they
report on your little treasure hunt, now do you, Scrooge?"
Mr. McDuck smoked so much with anger he really resembled my Grandpa Harry. (1)
"Easy, boss. Even I know Flinty's trying to pull a fast one here, but there's nothing
we can do about it for now." Launchpad soothed.
So Mr. McDuck and Launchpad continued to search for the lost treasure while Flinty
and his "cameradogs" (Beagles)watched, waiting for us to find it….so they could swipe
it, natch.
So Mr. McDuck and Launchpad searched until they found the part of the dam the map
indicted the treasure was. But reinforced cement was on top because this was part of
the dam. I soon arrived with a jackhammer. And some digging machines. I often come
to bring stuff Mr. McDuck and Launchpad need that they didn't think of ahead of time.
Launchpad used the jackhammer (2)to break thur the cement on the bottom of the dam
until we could all take turns digging with machines for the treasure. Knowing that
Mr. McDuck gets to keep it. Life's like that.
We dug and dug, far under the dam's foundation, deep under decades, maybe centuries
worth of dirt, sand and debris that had accumulated by the time the dam had been built.
Until we hit solid rock and could dig no further. There seemed to be no treasure around…
except for designs and patterns etched into solid rock.
And in certain areas we had hit solid rock much earlier...there were now "towers"
of natural rock in a circle that kept reminding me of something, somewhere. Somewhere
I've visited with Launchpad on all the crazy adventures we've had. But that's a lot of places
and I could not put my finger on which place this was reminding me of.
"Well, Scroogie, where the treasure? Nothing here but giant doodles. Hard to tell
what they're supposed to be, they're so big." Flintheart chuckled, since his news corp.
would make money off of Mr. McDuck being embarrassed.
Then, I looked up and had a vision of what this place looked like long ago, before
the dam was built.
"Stonehenge! This was a natural Stonehenge! A place to view the stars! For
astrology! The Aztecs and the Mayans were very interested in calendars and
star watching. Not sure why." I said.
Then, Launchpad spoke from his Irish heritage: "Famine. They were trying to
avoid famine. They thought if they planted when the stars told them to, if
they watered when the stars told them to… they could avoid crop failures.
Avoid famine. Why do you think my people made the mistake of relaying on
potatoes too much? Potatoes were reliable. Plant anything else….wheat, carrots,
you may eat or you might end up with nothing. Plant potatoes and you eat. Except..."
"For every a hundred years or so when there's a potato famine….and who remembers
the last time that happen?" I continued.
"How can make money off of this, Scroogie? A natural ancient astrology site that will
be covered by water when they rebuild the dam!" Flintheart chortled.
"You'll see, Flintheart." Mr. McDuck smiled.
Soon, a new dam was built...upstream from the ancient site. A much smaller (and therefore,
cheaper) dam that turned the power of water into electric power. The hot water the turbines
created were used in a new water park. With water rides and fountains and pools. And
tourists. And hotels. And lots of lots of profit of Mr. McDuck.
And the newly discovered ancient astrology site was a BIG tourist draw.
The End.
TO BE CONTINUED….
(1) Mr. McDuck looks so much like my Grandpa Harry all that's missing is the smelly
old stogie.
ATTENTION ANYBODY WHO SMOKES: I harbor the suspicion my Grandma
Dora (Grandpa Harry's wife, who died when I was maybe 6 months old) died from
lung cancer due to second hand smoke. If you can't quit for your sake, ask yourself:
who ELSE is breathing it in?
(2) I don't know how to do that and I don't think Mr. McDuck does neither. I'd be willing
to have Launchpad teach me. If Mr. McDuck is too busy believing Launchpad is stupid to
learn from him, that's his choice. Launchpad and I ADMIRE Mr. McDuck for knowing
lots of stuff he, Launchpad, doesn't...but Mr. McDuck is too blame stubborn.
