A/N: This was inspired by the Jenny/Chuck storyline in the finale. I'm going to do a short piece (probably 400 - 600 words each) for each of the characters affected by what Chuck and Jenny did. This one is from Jenny's POV.
Jenny:
I used to envy Dan. All it took was a perfect relationship with perfect Serena in her perfect world, and suddenly, he was a part of everything. He had access to the best parties, the best people, the best of the city, no questions asked, no nothing. Serena was his ticket in. From there on out, he was in. All from what? Love, or so he claimed.
I never had it like that. I worked to be here. I deserve to be here. I sacrificed a part of myself; at first, I thought it was a fair trade. A little manipulation, a little blackmail, a few dirty deeds, and I could be queen. I could be the ringleader, I could climb to the top. I was so naïve. It might have started out like that, dumping dairy, stupid schoolgirl games, but it just got worse. Every day, I sacrificed more and more of myself. Like quicksand, the more I struggled to stay above ground, the more I was sucked in, the more I gave up. I never stopped to realize how much I had given up until I had nothing left.
Damn Dan, damn Serena, damn Nate, damn their whole perfect world. It's sickening. Damn Blair, damn Eric, and above all, damn Chuck. I might have gotten myself into this mess, but he's entrenched me in it forever. I can never go back.
He felt heavy on top of me. Like a dead weight, only I was the one who feels dead inside now. For him, I was just another girl, just another lay, just another skinny, young thing. What we did – what he did to me – was just the product of a bottle of scotch and a stupid kiss. For him, it was meaningless; another notch on his belt, another conquest to smirk about. There were no feelings, no emotions involved, not for him.
I won't forget the way his breath stank of scotch, the way his eyes appraised me like I was just another business transaction, the way his sweaty skin stuck to mine. I won't forget how he rolled off me when he was finished, the way he pulled on his silk robe and left me shivering naked, the way he drawled an offer for me to stay. I won't forget that awful, gnawing feeling of loneliness. I won't forget the way Dan's fist sunk into the side of Chuck's head. I won't forget the dark hatred in Blair's eyes.
A girl can only take so much. I can't take any more. Even now, I'm shaking. I feel used up and worn out and I hope to hell and back he regrets what he did. I know I do.
A/N: What do you think? Review, review! Feedback keeps me motivated. :)
