"Happy Lemon Day!" Phil exclaims.
Dan feels unsure about this. It appears to be a jar of pickled lemons? He compliantly smiles at Phil to convey his satisfaction.
"Isn't this great?" Phil looks lovingly at the lemons, and at Dan. "I'm happy I get to spend Lemon Day with important people. It makes me feel content."
Dan shifts in his seat and rotates the lemons carefully in his arms. "Yeah uh, I'm glad to spend Lemon Day with you too Phil. It's pleasant."
Phil stands up and leaves to water the plants. Dan doesn't agree with the plants, but if it's Phil or the plants well then... Anyways, Dan doesn't see what the fuss is about these lemons. He inspects them, hoping that this is really a joke, and that there's something sensible, like a miniature pogo stick inside. They were sort of alluring in a weird way, he guesses. Lemons in a jar, such an unconventional idea. Maybe it wasn't such an odd gift, he was starting to grow fond of them. Maybe they could be used in a dish.
Later that evening, when he and Phil start preparing for bed, he lingers at the bathroom mirror, staring in his eyes, staring at the lemons on the bathroom counter, looking for something he hopes he finds. When Phil calls to him, with Netflix loaded on his laptop, he makes a split second decision, he cradles the lemons and sets them gently in between him and Phil on the bed, in the split where their two pillows join. Phil looks perturbed.
"Dan?"
"I'm ready to start the show."
"Um… Okay." Phil presses play and Dan only partially pays mind to the opening music commencing on Phil's laptop.
Dan gazes tenderly at the lemon jar. Phil's looking at it too, Dan fancies that he's looking at it with the same ardour in his eyes. He pulls up the covers, and makes sure the jar is sufficiently warmed. Phil coughs politely and adjusts the laptop on the covers, but Dan has eyes for none other than the 're twelve minutes into the programme when Dan interrupts.
"Phil?"
"Dan?"
"We should really name and gender the lemon jar."
"…Dan."
Dan looks up at him expectantly. Phil looks like he is biting back words.
"I really think that they look like a female to me, but I do feel that your input is important, as you are a proud parent as well."
"Dan."
"So are we agreed on the inexplicable yet persistent femininity of the lemon jar?"
"…Dan."
"It looks very regal, in a womanly way. I think that Olivia is fitting, but I know you've always loved the name Emily…"
"Dan."
Phil isn't so sure if Lemon Day will be getting any recognition or celebration in the Howell-Lester household any longer. Dan hugs Phil, and he's grateful for a moment, before he feels the all too familiar shape of the cold jar between them. A fit of jealousy overtakes him, and he takes Olivia into his hands, before rolling her off the bed. It's silent for a moment, and the dull thud of Olivia hitting the ground reverberates off the walls and sticks with remorse in Phil's heart. He can hear Dan's unsteady breath. He chances it and tries to hug Dan again, this time without that meddling Olivia between them. Dan is still inside Phil's embrace.
"Dan?"
Dan gets up and storms out of the room, but not before scooping up Olivia protectively in his arms. Why Phil would ever do such a thing, he would never know. He had foolishly believed that he and Phil were bonding over her, naming and caretaking of their first lemon jar. Dan had pictured them maybe buying more lemon jars, maybe having a boy. Maybe they would even name him Dil. He had pictured a future with Phil that was happy, that included a family.
He sat down on the stool where he had first received her, initially with confused and even judgemental feelings. He cradles Olivia closer to his heart and murmurs small nothings against the glass. He hears Phil's unsure footsteps, uneven and soft, pad across the cold floor.
"Dan?"
He doesn't respond and Phil sighs.
"Shouldn't we have a family picture? I was thinking you and Olivia, since I did present her to you here, six hours ago." Phil says this all very nonchalant, like it isn't anything deserving of making Dan beam, and his heart bloom.
Dan can only nod and smile awkwardly as the camera flashes, and he holds Olivia on his lap long after. Phil hugs him tight afterwards.
"Dan, Lemon Day is over tomorrow, and I do need to get ri - I mean use the lemons…"
