"Hey, Minato...I think Yuka-tan and Mitsuru-sempai are dating!"
Looking up from his magazine, Minato rolled his eyes and replied, "C'mon, Junpei, be serious! You've been saying the same thing all week! Give it up! It's not funny anymore!"
Taking a seat on the couch next to the blue-haired youth, Junpei said, "Don't try and deny it, dude! All the signs are there!" Minato was about to replay in defense when Akihiko walked in. He seemed to have a rather disgruntled look on his face.
Slamming his boxing gear onto the table, Akihiko sat down on the couch and began mumbling to himself under his breath. "What the hell's got you in a bitchy mood?" asked Junpei curiously.
Akihiko sighed and burried his face in his hands. "I...I saw something I shouldn't have...something that caught me...rather off guard..." His spidey-senses going off the scale, Junpei smirked and replied, "Well...tell us what it is! We promise we won't tell, dude!"
There was such a look of pure sadness in his eyes, it almost seemed like the boxing champ had given up on life itself. Akihiko looked up at the two boys and replied, "I saw my darling little Fuuka-chan...kissing that Natsuki Moriyama girl!" After hearing this, Minato's face turned bright red and Junpei fell over from an large amount of blood exploding out of his nostrils.
"H-How did you witness this?" Minato stammered. Akihiko let out another deep sigh as he glanced down at the floor, recollecting his thoughts. Minato began to feel sorry he even bothered asking.
"I...I was heading over to the mall, because I told Fuuka earlier I would meet up with her there, but I saw her...and Natsuki...kissing passionately. It was too much for me to handle, so I left..."
"ARE YOU AN IDIOT?"
Minato glanced over his shoulder and saw Junpei glaring angrily at Akihiko while trying to plug up his bloody nostrils with tissue paper. "HOW COULD YOU JUST RUN OFF WITH YOUR TAIL BETWEEN YOUR LEGS?" he shouted furiously, "ANY MAN WITH BALLS WOULD OBVIOUSLY STAY AND ENJOY THE LESBO-FEST! YOU'RE JUST A DUMB FAGGOT!"
'I actually thought he was going to say something smart for once...' Minato thought with a light chuckle. Akihiko, however, seemed to have become completely numb. He just stared blankly at the floor as if he was hoping for some kind of sign.
Shaking his head in disappointment, Junpei took his place back on the couch and said, "Frankly, I don't care about your problems. Now, let us get back to our original topic: Yuka-tan and Mitsuru-sempai are dating!" Akihiko finally looked up from the floor and asked, "Do you...have any proof?"
Junpei flashed a grin as he replied, "Yes, I do have proof! Okay, tell me this...who is Yuka-tan always the most nervous around?"
Akihiko and Minato glanced at each other for a few seconds before they both replied, "It's Mitsuru."
Junpei nodded and said, "You are both correct. Now: Who was the only person Mitsuru had stay back when we went to rescue Fuuka inside Tartarus?"
"It was Yukari..." Minato and Akihiko both replied nervously. They were starting to realize that Junpei might actually have a point to this argument.
Junpei smiled at the confused look on his two friends' faces. Leaning slightly forward, Junpei whispered, "My final question: Who gently gropes Mitsuru in the darkness of Tartarus when we're not looking?"
Minato and Akihiko, however, did not know the answer to this question. "Actually, it was me," Junpei exclaimed with a chuckle, "but that's beside the point! After I ACCIDENTLY grope Mitsuru, Yukari is the one who comes to her rescue! So...there you have it! Yuka-tan and Mitsuru-sempai are lovers!"
Minato and Akihiko both stared at Junpei like he was the biggest dumbass they had ever seen. Suddenly, the front door swung open and Yukari walked in. "Hi, guys!" she waved as she walked by the three boys and headed for the stairway.
"Wait, Yukari-chan!" Minato called as he got up and ran over to her. "I'm sorry to ask this," said the blue-haired boy, "But...but are you in a relationship with Mitsuru-sempai?" The moment he asked this, Yukari's face turned into one of disgust.
"EWW! NO WAY! DON'T BE DISGUSTING! WHAT THE HELL GAVE YOU THAT IDEA?" Yukari exclaimed, her face red. Minato and Akihiko both pointed at Junpei, who ended up having a shoe thrown at his face. Shaking her head in disappointment, Yukari stomped up the stairs.
Sighing, Junpei rubbed her nose in pain and muttered, "I guess I was wrong about Yuka-tan and Mitsuru-sempai going out..."
Once she reached the third floor, Yukari pulled out her room keys and unlocked the door. When she stepped into her room, Yukari noticed that the entire room was hidden in darkness. Suddenly, a familiar voice purred, "Ah...you're finally here, Yukari-chan..."
Flipping on the lights, Yukari saw that Mitsuru was lying on her bed, completely naked and covered in sweat. Smiling, Yukari began unbuttoning her school uniform.
"Too bad those guys will never know..."
