A/N : The next chapter of 'Out Of My League' is already half written, I just wanted to write something different. OOML is still very much at the forefront of my mind, much because of your wonderful reviews. Thank you.
This is just a short piece that ran through my mind this afternoon during a meeting at work (it was really dull).
I often wonder for a lot of Anna and Bates scenes what would happen next, once the camera's had stopped rolling so to speak. This was difficult given the situation, but I wanted to play over in my mind what I think would have been said. This was the result. I hope I have stayed true to the characters.
Disclaimer: Downton Abbey belongs to Julian Fellowes/ ITV/ Carnival so on and so forth...
'One kiss? To take with me.'
Anna couldn't refuse him. She didn't want to. John could have anything he wanted at this moment. She meant it when she said she would marry him now, even though he was a condemned man. Anna had never known a love like it, not even between herself and her parents. Her siblings. What she felt for the man standing before her was unconditional, he had invaded her heart and soul.
From the moment she first met him, she didn't stand a chance. That April morning, the day the Titanic and thousand of souls on board had been lost. John walked into her life and she knew her world would never be the same again. She remembered the glint in his eye as he smiled at her for the first time. The heartache she felt when she found out he was to leave which surprised her somewhat, the relief when he walked back into the servants hall that morning.
Over the next few months the friendship which existed between them grew into more. He always had a compassion in his eyes when he spoke to her, John looked at Anna in a way no one else ever had. The night he brought her the tray, that act of kindness convinced her that he might reciprocate her feelings. She knew that same evening, if she didn't know before, that she was in love with John. And had been ever since. It had been so long she couldn't remember what it was not to love him.
John broke the kiss. It just wasn't fair. Anna sobbed gently as her husband held her close to him. She knew John was innocent yet he was to be snatched from her, unless some miracle could be performed by Mr Murray.
'It's not a good chance, Mrs Bates.'
Those words had reverberated around her head since she had heard them, alternating with the judges cold words as he sentenced John to death. Late at night was the worst. When she needed comfort, the only man who could provide it was locked in a cold prison cell. Never again would she feel the warm embrace of her husband at night. Memories of the one night they did share together would do little to console.
John closed his eyes as he held Anna in his arms. He was so relieved to have been able to share one more kiss with the person who had saved him, the woman who had taught him life could be kind, that love was worth it. John hated the thought of leaving Anna alone more than the thought of the fate that lay ahead of him. All the promises he had made her would dissolve into nothing.
Holding on to her tightly, he allowed his mind to wander to Anna's future. Would she meet somebody new? Although he hoped it wouldn't happen right away, he wanted Anna to be happy. To go on with her life. The thought that she would spend the rest of her days mourning him chilled John to the bone. A woman with a soul as beautiful as hers deserved to live a life full of happiness and joy.
'Can we finish up now, please,' the guard said before clearing his throat. Anna let out a gasp as John looked over his shoulder at the guard.
This was it.
Emotions overtook Anna as she buried her head into John's shoulder. John remained calm, he had decided Anna's last memory of him would not be seeing him breaking down. Taking Anna's hand, he lead her to the end of the table so that there was no longer a barrier between them.
'Steady on,' the guard called out, stepping forward before taking hold of John's upper arm forcefully.
'For the love of God, let me say goodbye to my wife.' John yelled, leaving the prison guard stunned. 'Please.'
The guard took a slight step back before allowing John to continue. John raised Anna's hands to his lips, kissing them lightly before moving his hands to rest on either side of Anna's face. Her features were ashen, her eyes red from crying yet she had never looked more beautiful to John than in this moment.
'This is so unfair,' Anna said weakly, her voice breaking with each word. 'I believe in your innocence wholeheartedly, yet you are being taken away from me.'
'Anna, to know you believe in me warms my heart more than you will ever know.' John replied before placing a soft kiss on her forehead. 'Now believe me when I say a more beautiful, kind hearted, perfect being as you has never walked the earth. Knowing you and falling in love with you made my life worthwhile. Nothing made sense until you walked into my life.'
'I don't want you to leave me.' Anna cried before burying her head in his chest once more. 'Please don't leave me.'
John couldn't help it then. Looking to the ceiling, he closed his eyes as tear after tear began to fall down his cheeks. He couldn't leave it like this. John had to know that Anna would get over this, as best she could. He had to reassure her that everything would be alright. This may be the end for him, but not for her.
'Now, you listen to me,' John began to speak again, his voice now completely overcome with emotion. 'I want you to promise me something. Mourn me for a little while by all means, but please, don't let the grief consume you so much that you don't go on and live your life.'
'John, don't. I can't even contemplate...'
'Anna, please.' John interrupted, his voice stern as he gripped Anna's hands tightly in his own. 'Remember me as someone who loved you unreservedly with a passion and desire that could not possibly be measured. But go on from here, meet someone new. Be the mother you have always been destined to be. Don't let the grief you feel now hold you back. Promise me, Anna.'
'I could never love anyone the way I love you, John.' Anna whimpered, her bottom lip trembling. 'Never.'
'My darling, I'm not asking you to. What you and I shared some people will never find. But that doesn't mean you should be alone for the rest of your life. Someone else out there is deserving of your love. Possibly more than I have been. Assure me you'll find him, or at least try to.'
Anna took in a deep breath as she looked away from John for a moment, before meeting his gaze again. 'I can promise I'll try.'
'Alright, that's time now.'
The guard stepped towards John and took hold of his arm. Anna and John's eyes never lost contact as they reluctantly let go of each other. Another guard on the other side of the bars appeared to unlock the door and pulled it open. John was pulled through to the other side. Anna took a few steps forwards as the guard locked the door once again. Wrapping her fists around the bars, John manoeuvred himself so he could face Anna and look into her eyes one last time.
'I love you. I might look in on you from time to time,' John whispered, summoning all the strength he had to form a smile.
Anna couldn't speak, all she could manage was to raise her hand to her mouth, kiss it gently before moving her hand through the bars and placing her fingers on John's mouth.
She left her arm suspended in the air through the bars as John was dragged away, almost like she was reaching out for him. He stopped and looked back over his shoulder before being taken to the left and out of sight.
He was gone. Forever. And Anna's world had suddenly lost all it's meaning.
