Another Wolvine inspired Shikatema Fanfic. Or rather, a Wolvine and Friends inspired fanfic. You know, for someone who has never had a crush on anyone, I sure seem to base a lot of my Shikatema stuff on them…Hng. Anywho, Wolvine is a lot like Shikamaru, and the conversations they have with friends are ones I can easily imagine Shikamaru and Temari having. You know, if you tone down the weirdness a bit.

Special thanks to Wolvine's friends over the world. Particularly Jena/Twilightstar/Cakechasecat/Ali. You're one of my best friends you know that? :D Oh, and Jubjub, you're awesome man. So many random conversations with you guys... Yeah.

I still don't own Naruto. Nothing has changed in the past few days. You write way too many Shikatema fanfics…


Annoying

"You're annoying."
"You know what else is annoying?"
"My annoying face?"
"Well that is annoying, but it's not what I mean."
"Then what's annoying?"
"The word annoying. It's really annoying."
"I agree that annoying is annoying."
"This conversation is annoying."

(Editor's Note: Yes. This did happen. Well not really. It was a lot longer. I wrote this part, because Donut wanted the exact words. You see, my usual comeback is either 'YOU'RE _' or 'Your face.')

Neither of them could ever remember how these stupid arguments started. They could go on for hours, until eventually Shikamaru fell asleep. This usually resulted in Temari selecting an inanimate object and attacking him with it. Sometimes this didn't always manage to wake the Nara, and annoyed (Author's Note: See what I did thar? *Trollface*) Temari would leave. Of course, Shikamaru would then be yelled and beaten by various females afterwards, including Tsunade, Yoshino and Temari herself. Both of them pretended to get angry about these arguments, but they enjoyed them.

Once Sakura made the mistake of stating they were like an old married couple. If it hadn't been for her healing expertise, she might have never been able to talk again Temari was so violent. The Sand Kunoichi had developed a liking for strangling people, a technique that much to his displeasure was practiced frequently on Shikamaru.

The 'Annoying' debate went on for some time, though after a while they fell silent. As they couldn't remember who started it, they couldn't remember who ended it either. Shikamaru lay back, watching the clouds, and after a bit he began to snore gently. Temari watched him for a minute, marveling at how someone could fall asleep so quickly. She grew bored of this quickly however, and since she didn't share her friend's passion about clouds, she began to look for something to do.

She pulled a fistful of grass from the ground and looked at it for a moment, then back to Shikamaru's sleeping figure. She smirked as an idea came to mind, and she leant forward, her nose practically resting on his chin, eye to eye.

"Hey lazy. Wake up." This of course did nothing to wake the boy, so she prodded the area just below his eye. Now Shikamaru was a strange character when it came to his eyes. His small orbs were not very remarkable, but they were very sensitive to the touch. They were his weak point, particularly the flesh surrounding the eyeballs. Apparently it was something that ran on his mother's side, and it was something few people knew about. Chouji knew because he'd told him. Ino didn't, because she'd blurt it out to everyone, and who knew what kind of people were around? Temari knew because Yoshino has told her.

Two of the four most troublesome women in his life (the other two being Ino and Tsunade) got along. It was mortifying. The face he had pulled when he had come home one day and seen Temari on his sofa being shown a photo album (fortunately not the baby pictures, but it was still pretty embarrassing) by his mother was priceless. Absolutely priceless. Oh Shikamaru! I didn't know you used to wear deer pajamas. Why didn't you tell me? Oh the shame. The shame.

When Temari poked him his eyes opened immediately, screaming like a lunatic. It took him a second to recover his composure, but he lost it right away when he saw the proximity of Temari's face. His eyes widened slightly, his face took on a slightly pinkish hue, and he could feel the little trickle of blood oozing down his nostril.
"Ah… Temari…" Mistake. The moment the words were out of his mouth they were replaced by several strands of grass, some of which he swallowed.(Yes. I've done this too. In fact I did it to Donut, hence why she was able to write this part. Ed.)He sat up, pushing the hysterical Temari out the way, choking. "You (cough) b(cough cough)itch! (Cough cough cough)" He spat out the blades of grass, kneeling over and shooting Temari-who at that point was coming alarmingly near to choking herself-a glare that would have made his mother proud.

Temari sat up, wiping tears of laughter from her eyes. It had been ages since she'd laughed like that. Though she might not look like it, Kankuro had been a terrible influence on her in her youth. The two had constantly played pranks on each other, most of which involved Gaara, back when he was a mindless killer. She rubbed her face, grinning.

"You know, just because we look after deer doesn't mean we like to eat like them."
"Ah shut up Shadow-boy. It was funny."
"Oh you think so do you? Let me show you how hilarious it is!" Ripping a handful of grass he lurched forwards, grinning like a madman. Which he sort of was. He hadn't acted so childlike in… Forever. It was so unlike him. He attempted to shove the grass down Temari's throat, but instead she bit his hand. Hard. "Holy- That was unnecessary!" (AN: Another of Wolv's 'catchphrases.' My personal favourite is whenever you ask Wolv where someone is, almost always they'll say 'They got eaten by a polar bear on a rampage.')

She didn't let go though, and after the initial pain Shikamaru noticed the awkward way he was positioned on Temari. He blinked and slid off somewhat sheepishly, his hand finally being released. "Ow. Next time I'll go for the nose."
"Thanks for the warning. I'll be sure to wear nose plugs next time." Temari sat up, but then smirked and pointed at his face. "You got a little something." With her other hand she touched under her nose. "Here."

Shikamaru brought his finger up to his own face, and swore as he noticed the blood. Temari laughed, and then stood, offering her hand to the Chuunin. "Oh Shikamaru."
"Hng?" He took it, simply because he was too lazy to stand up himself.
"This whole grass incident, it was annoying."


And this is pretty much my life. Except for the nosebleeds. It's very circular C:

I LOVE SHIKAMARU+NOSEBLEED :D