A/N: I thought of this while at the dental office today. I would have written it down, but I hate doing that, since it leaves evidence of my work and thats something I don't want certain people seeing. Well maybe this one is okay, but still. Anyways, enjoys~ Also, updates for On the Other Side should be up soon. I'm also changing my Pen name for... personal reasons. It will be changed to NighttimeFirefly whish I took from my MFB OC. If you see that name pop up anywhere, remember me~ Also, i was just recently attacked by my friend's cat D: It left 2 long red marks on both my arms and they haven't gone away yet. It's been 3 days.
Disclaimer: I don't own PoT. If I did, this would have really happened.
Summary: In which Akaya wonders where babies come from. Why not ask his closest friends?
Characters: Kirihara Akaya, Rikkai regulars, Hiyoshi Wakashi, Zaizen Hikaru
Reason: I was dead bored while waiting for my mom at the dental office. It wasn't even my appointment!
xXxXxXx
Akaya walked through the door of the clubhouse. It was Saturday, so he only had tennis practice. As he walked towards the courts, two little boys, around 3rd grade he guessed, ran up to him.
"Onii-chan, we have a question!" One of them said, pulling on his yellow jersey. Akaya crouched down so that he was at eye level with them.
"What is it?" He asked. sometimes, little kids and their questions were just so cute. The boys looked to each other, then turned their questioning gazes back to him.
"Where do babies come from?" They asked together, eyes wide. Akaya froze. To tell the truth, he really didn't know. No one had told him, and he had fallen asleep that class.
"Um, I actually don't know." He said, " No one ever told me." Then he stood up straight, a wide smile on his face. "Wait! Maybe Buchou know! Wait here, I'll go ask him." He told them, and ran towards the courts.
xXxXxXx
When Akaya ran into the courts, swinging his racket around and nearly hitting several people in the face, it made his teammates wonder what was wrong. He ran up to Yukimura, who was giving out orders.
"Buchou! Buchou!" He yelled, stopping to catch his breath. Yukimura patted his back, asking him what was wrong. The other regulars had started to approach them, except Sanada, who was watching from afar while assigning more laps to the first years.
"I have a question!" He said quickly, standing up straight and looking at his captain with wide eyes, like those kids that had asked him first. Yukimura smiled.
"Oh? And what would that be?" He asked sweetly. Sometimes, Akaya was just so cute, asking his little questions...
"Where do babies come from?" ... What?
A short silence followed his question, other than the sound of rackets hitting tennis balls. Niou opened his mouth to speak, but he was stopped by Yagyuu and Yanagi. "Don't." They said.
Akaya stared at his captain, waiting for an answer. Yukimura's smile twitched down ever so slightly. " Why don't you ask Hiyoshi-kun and Zaizen-kun, they're your best friends right?" He said, not wanting to explain reproduction to their baby boy. And he was sure Zaizen and Hiyoshi would think of something. If they thought the same thing as him after hearing the question.
Akaya grinned. "Oh yeah! Thanks!" He said, and pulled his cell phone from his pocket. The others leaned in, wanting to hear every word.
"Akaya! No cell phones at practice!" Sanada yelled, walking over to them. Yukimura held up a hand.
"It's okay, I gave him permission." He said, then he whispered, "You'll want to hear this." Sanada nodded, wondering what their captain was up to. He looked back to Akaya, who was frowning.
"Hikaru didn't pick up." He said, then went back to his contacts list. "I'll try Wakashi, then." He pressed talk, holding the phone up to ear. He ignored the others that were leaning closer. Three rings later, his call was answered.
"Hello?" A voice on the other end said. Akaya grinned.
"Waka-chan~" He sang, Hiyoshi immediately knew he wanted something.
"What do you want, Akaya?" He asked right away. Akaya pouted.
"Nothing! By the way, have you seen Hikaru? He's not picking up his cell."
"Yeah, he's here. We're having practice matches with Shitenhouji and - go away, Atobe- We're taking a break - I said, go away- and Atobe won't stop bothering me." He complained. Akaya could practically see his friend's frown.
"I see. anyway, I have a question, get Hikaru, too." he waited before he heard the older boy on the other end.
"Akaya? What do you want now?" Zaizen asked, annoyance in his voice. Akaya beamed.
"I have a question." He said into the mic.
"We got that. What is it?" Hiyoshi asked. Akaya paused for a second.
"Where do babies come from?" He asked innocently.
There was a long silence on the other end.
xXxXxXx
Hiyoshi and Zaizen stared at the phone in front of them. Had they heard what they thought they heard? From Akaya? Hiyoshi placed his hand over the speaker and looked up at Zaizen, who was in the same state of shock.
"... Please tell me I'm not hearing things. Did Akaya just ask us where babies come from?" At his nod, Hiyoshi sighed, shaking his head. "What do we tell him?"
"Not the truth, thats for sure. If it's anything like when we learned, it can't be good." Both boys shivered at the memory.
"Atleast you didn't have Atobe-buchou try to explain it to you with more detail last year." He said, and Zaizen raised an eyebrow.
"Really now? What happened?" Hiyoshi frowned.
xXxXxXx
"Today Ore-sama will teach you about the act of reproduction." An 8th grade Atobe said from the front of the small room. After hearing about his classes from last year, Atobe had dragged Hiyoshi, 7th grade at the time, to one of the seperate rooms in the clubhouse for a 'private lesson'. Hiyoshi rolled his eyes.
"But Buchou, I already learned this last year." He said with a frown. Atobe walked up to him, a smile on his face, and pulled on his cheek.
"Nonsense! They only teach you the process after the events. They don't teach you what has to be done in order for that to happen. You need to know this if you ever want kids. Ore-sama will teach you what they should have. Now be thankful." He said, and let go of the younger boy's face.
Hiyoshi rubbed his cheek, "That hurt." He mumbled. Atobe the proceeded to pull out several papers and graphs, pinning them to the walls.
"Okay, now let's begin."
After that day, Hiyoshi swore never to tell Atobe of his past classes. Or anything else that might have him dragged back to that room.
xXxXxXx
Zaizen patted his friend's back. "I feel your pain. Kenya-san did the same thing when I was a freshman."
Hiyoshi raised an eyebrow. "Seriously?"
Zaizen's eye twitched. "Well, not exactly the same thing..."
xXxXxXx
"Hikaruuuuuuuu!"
Zaizen, 7th grade, flinched. He knew that voice all too well. He turned around as the taller blond boy ran up to him, tackling him into a hug.
"I heard you had Health today." He said with a smirk. Zaizen blushed, it was not one of his favorite classes. Especially with today's lesson. Kenya, 8th grade, laughed. "I knew it!"
"S-So?" Zaizen stuttered. He really didn't want to talk about it today, not with Kenya at least.
"Soooo, I heard about your lesson today, and that kinda sucks." Kenyan said, releasing the younger boy from his bone-crushing hug/tackle. "They don't even teach you everything, especially the really important parts." He said. Zaizen wanted to question further, when Kenya shoved a book in his arms. "Here! Read this, it'll teach you a lot more than that class would!" And he took off running to his next class. Zaizen, out of curiosity, looked at the cover. It was a manga, that was for sure, so he shrugged it off and tossed the book into his bag.
The next day, he threw the book at Kenya, effectively hitting him in the back of the head.
"I see you enjoyed it~" Kenya teased, poking Zaizen's blushing face, earning himself a punch in the face.
He was never taking manga from Kenya ever again.
xXxXxXx
Both boys shivered at their memories, glancing at their respective sempai. Atobe was in conversation with Shiraishi, deciding on the next order of pairs for after break. Kenya was talking with Shishido, seated on the bench. They turned away, deciding to go back to the problem at hand. Or, in their hands. Akaya was complaining on the other end of the phone, telling them to answer his question.
"Come oooon guys, I'm waiting." He whined. Suddenly, a thought came to them, and two mischevious grins appeared on their faces.
"We're gonna lie anyway," Zaizen said.
"So we might as well have fun with it." Hiyoshi finished, and whispered something to the dark haired boy, who's grin grew.
xXxXxXx
Akaya stood impatiently, holding the phone to his ear. It had been two minutes since he asked them, and they still hadn't answered.
"You reeeaaally wanna know?" Zaizen asked.
"Yes!" Akaya said, clutching the phone closer.
"Okay then, we'll tell you." He said, and the Rikkai regulars were wondering if they really were going to tell him the truth.
"Babies come from..." Hiyoshi started, and the others leaned in, "Bright, glowing crystals found deep inside caves, guarded by dragons, and only the cranes are allowed to come in, to deliver them."
A short silence folloed the statement before Akaya squealed in excitement.
"Really?" He asked, jumping up and down.
"Yup, go have fun." Zaizen said before the line went dead. Akaya pocketed his phone, still jumping up and down.
"This is great! I can't wait to tell them!" He said, before running out of the tennis area and up the stairs. The others all exchanged looks.
"So," Marui started, "How long do you think it'll take before he realizes they totally bullshitted him?"
Niou laughed. "Never, knowing him."
"Or at least until someone actually tells him, someone he would trust over the word of his two best friends." Yukimura said, and walked back to give drills. Sanada sighed, following after him. The small group eventually faded away, the regulars wanting to get back to practice.
xXxXxXx
Shortly after they hung up, the two errupted into laughter.
"He actually believed us?" Zaizen said, clutching his stomach. Honestly, the things they came up with. They had gotten the idea from an online game they both played, and it had been used before anyway.
"Still, maybe we should tell him the truth later." Hiyoshi said, wiping his eyes.
Atobe and Kenya walked up to the two, who were gasping for breath. "Oh? What's so funny?" Atobe asked, raising an eyebrow. Kenya was patting Zaizen's back, attempting to help him steady his breathing. Atobe followed his example.
"Akaya called, asking where babies came from." Hiyoshi said, after finally having his breathing calm down. Atobe gave him a questioning look.
"What did you tell him?" He asked, he didn't want to get a call from Yukimura telling him that their 'baby boy' had gotten mentally scarred because of his teammate.
"We told him that 'babies come from bright, glowing crystals found in caves, guarded by dragons'." Zaizen answered, "And that 'only the cranes are allowed to get them'." He chuckled. "I honestly didn't think he'd believe us though."
Kenya too started laughing a little, and Atobe rolled his eyes.
"Honestly, couldn't you have thought of anything better?" He asked.
"Hey, he should have known, it's way too common in anime, manga and games. If he had thought it through, he'd have known we were lying." Hiyoshi said with a straight face.
Atobe just shook his head.
xXxXxXx
"... And that's where babies come from." Akaya finished. The two boys stared at him for a while, before two wide grins took over their faces.
"Really?"
"That's so cool!"
Akaya laughed as he watched the two run off, waving him good-bye. He thought about asking Yanagi later about whether or not Hiyoshi and Zaizen had told him the truth, but they wouldn't lie to him. Right?
xXxXxXx
The next day, Akaya was given a lesson in health class he never wanted to remember.
"Buchou! They lied to me! Babies don't come from crystals!"
