a/n: so i've recently gotten back into writing and wow this is trash. i've had this lil oneshot in my phone for ages and it's super short AND it wasn't even originally a fic for this fandom. anyways i saw a lot of bucky and steve in it and altered it a bit to fit the pairing. i suck at writing so if it's ooc i'm so sorry. you could actually take this fic as different pairings? (fem!steve x bucky, steve x bucky, reader x bucky) yea it's dumb so if you read it thank you so much? this wasn't beta'd or whatever so if there are mistakes it because i'm lazy

disclaimer: i do NOT own marvel or any of their characters because if i did steve and bucky would be a cute ass couple just chillin in the 90s with their 3 cats and their shitty apartment, but i guess that should be saved for another fic omg.

anyways enjoy :-)

"Come here." His voice was barely above a whisper and I could hardly see his outstretched hand as my eyes adjusted to the moonlit room. I slid my hand into his as he tugged me forward and brought his free hand to my waist.

We stayed like this for a few moments. Perfectly still. Everything felt right. It didn't feel like we were being ripped away from each other. The soft music caused our bodies to gently sway to the rhythm.

"Please don't go." I broke the silence, my voice betraying me and sounding broken. I knew I'd be lost with out him. Bucky sighed and pulled me closer. Resting his head next to mine, his steady breath like a soft lullaby lulling me to lay my head on his chest. I knew tonight would be our last night together for God knows how long. We didn't throw ourselves at each other in a night full of wild sex like so many of Bucky's friend had done on their last night in America. We, instead, held one another. Beating hearts and fingers tracing the subtle curves of each other. We stay wrapped up in one another for hours. Tonight was about us, being together, not some stupid war on the other side of the world.

The sun was rising and neither of us had taken our eyes off the other. "I have to go." His voice sounded strained, like he was trying to hold back tears. I turned to see the clock on the wall. 5:30 AM. His plane would be leaving for England soon and like it or not Sergeant James Barnes of the 107th Infantry would need to be on it. I sighed and rolled over, "I know." I pushed my face into the pillow hoping to hide the tears that slid down my face.

I could hear him rustling about, returning clothes to his body, running a comb through his dark hard, and lacing up his shoes.

"I'm gonna miss you so damn much." His voice was louder this time. I turned to look at him. Despite his sharp looking uniform and clean look, his face was a mess. Puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks looked out of place amongst that nice Army uniform. I pulled myself from the bed to wrap my arms around his neck.

"I hate you." I said with a grin, trying to hold myself together. "You love me." He replied with a lopsided smile. "Hate you." I pushed back. "Love me." The smile was gone and his voice was barely a whisper. I nodded slightly and leaned in letting our lips ghost across each other.

"Just come back in one piece, Buck, for me." I pulled back and put my hands on his shoulders. I decided against telling him to wait for me to join up with him overseas. Me talking about joining the Army set him on edge and always seemed to put him in a defensive mood. I didn't want our last few moments to be filled with anger. Bucky nodded and brought his hands up to cup my face. He leaned in and once again, our lips touched. I tried my hardest ti keep this, take this moment and savor it. I never wanted it to end. The way his mouth worked against mine, his calloused hands form years of labor lightly working themselves into my hair, my hands clinging to him like a lifeline. Which, in a way, he was my lifeline. I'd been so lost before him and now that I'd had him , he was being pulled away so fast I could hardly hang on.

When he pulled back I noticed that I had started to cry again, the thick tears making their way down my cheeks. I bit back a sob as his hands returned to my face to gently wipe at the free flowing tears. "Goodbye." Bucky whispered and placed a chaste kiss against my temple.

Bucky picked up his bag and turned to walk out the door, taking one last look at me before he left. The door closed and nothing but silenced followed. Everything felt shattered. It was like there was a large gaping hole in my chest. We'd have letters to remind us that we were okay and in love but never to reassure one another that he was safe.

I tried to calm myself down, but the thought of not being in his arms every night made my stomach drop. The thought of him being put in combat, in harm's way, made me sick with worry. I laid myself down and shut my eyes tight trying to relive our past night together over and over. But no matter how many times I played the night's events in my head, I could never forget that the best thing about me just walked out the door.

END