Title: Ultimatum
Author: mindy35
Rating: T, adult themes.
Disclaimer: Not mine, no money made.
Spoilers: thru to "Rise".
Pairing: Castle/Beckett, minor Beckett/Other
Summary: Beckett flirts with someone else and Castle breaks under the pressure.
(A/N: This is an older idea of mine, inspired by "Rise" and by re-re-re-watching season three and being all WTFKB? over the Josh thing and wondering what might happen if Kate tried to pull anything like that now. I am not sure it is entirely in line with where they have taken her character this season but I hope it still works. Let me know what you think.)
I.
The second he got her alone, Castle slammed the interrogation room door behind them. "I can't do this. I thought I could. I thought I was up for anything, I thought I could stick it out but I was wrong."
"Oka-ay…" Beckett took a beat after being dragged from her investigation, eying him with both incredulity and uncertainty. "You wanna give me some clue as to what we're talking about here?"
"I mean, I hung in there for Josh," he went on, beginning to pace the stuffy little room. "It nearly killed me watching you walk off into the sunset with the tall, dark and handsome doctor – repeatedly, I might add. But I did it." He drew in some air then puffed it out, mumbling under his breath, "Imagining you with him and him with you was a particular brand of torture I never wish to experience again. But no way was I gonna bail after what happened with Demming, what it took to get you back."
"Get me back?" she muttered, frowning.
Ignoring her objection, Castle just turned on his heel, retracing his steps and casting her a cursory glance. "Then there was Will, of course. The hunky ex-boyfriend looking for a second shot. Not that I can blame him for that. I'd like a second shot. I'd like a first shot. But this guy—" he stopped abruptly, flinging an arm in the direction of the bullpen, "this guy, Kate?"
Beckett ducked her head to hide a smile, relieved to know the subject of her interrogation. "You just don't like him because he was flirting with me."
"No. I don't blame him for flirting with you," Castle replied swiftly, squaring up to her over the table at which they normally presented such a united front. "Not when you've been giving him the oh-so-subtle green-light signal implicitly understood by any straight man with a pulse."
She cocked her head at him, brows knit. "What's your problem then?"
"My problem," he said, stabbing an irate finger on the tabletop, "is that I blame you for flirting back. And don't even try to tell me that you weren't."
Beckett stalled momentarily, weighing up whether to challenge or surrender. Then she gave a light laugh, spreading her arms at her sides. "Okay, fine. I won't. But it was just flirting, Castle, I didn't mean anything by it. I was just…"
"Just what?"
She shrugged, the gesture sheepish. "Messing with you, I guess."
He blinked at her in incomprehension. "Messing with me?"
"Little bit, yeah." Her cheeks grew pink as she took in his shock, his apparent hurt. Her eyes dropped to the floor, her voice shaking slightly as she turned to go. "But if it upsets you—"
"Is this some sort of game to you?" he interrupted, halting her with his tone. "Do you think this is a game we're playing here? Because this is so not a game. Not to me."
She let out a sigh, unable to properly meet his gaze. "No. I know."
"Apparently you don't."
"Castle—"
"Because if this was a game," he went on without heeding her, "I wouldn't be risking my life on a daily basis – against my daughter's wishes by the way – just so I could spend every waking moment at your side." He started to move around the table towards her, eyes fixed on her face. "If this was a game, I wouldn't have agents and publishers beating my door down for pages I haven't written because all I can think about is you. If this was a game, I'd be able to look at another woman and not see your eyes, your face, your…" he gestured up and down the length of her with a frustrated grimace, "everything."
Beckett put out a hand to calm him but stopped shy of touching him. "Okay. I think you've made your point. Not a game. I will quit it with whathisface." She strode to the door, deliberately putting some distance between them. "Can we get back to work now please?"
"This is not about whathisface," Castle stated, for once not following her lead. He refused to trail her to the door as she expected, refused to let the conversation drop as she clearly wanted him to. His feet remained planted in place, eyes boring into her back.
"Then what's got you so riled up?" She quirked an eyebrow at him, attempting to dispel some of the tension in the air. "Somebody get out of the wrong side of someone else's bed this morning?"
Castle was silent, jaw twitching. "I'm not kidding here, Kate."
She nodded once, eyes falling away from his. "I can see that."
"And you know full well that I am not in the least interested in anybody else's bed, nor have I been in quite some time."
"I…" She shuffled on the spot, jutting out her chin. "I don't know that I know that."
He studied her a moment with pained, perplexed eyes. "God, you can be the most frustrating woman alive sometimes, you know that? What do I have to do to get through to you?" He spread his arms out wide, giving a sad, exasperated laugh. "Tell me. Please. And I'll do it. Whatever it is. Whatever it takes. I will do it! Because I've tried everything I can think of."
Beckett moved away, head wagging at the floor. "Castle, I don't know what you're talking about. You're not making any sense to me."
"I'm not making sense?" he spluttered, the heat rising in his face. "You're a Detective, one of New York's finest! It's just not possible for you not to get what's going on here."
She faced him, arms folded, barely meeting his eyes. "Well, I don't. So why don't you enlighten me?"
He gave another tortured laugh, ran a palm over his face, kneading his eye sockets with his fingertips. And when his eyes opened again and met hers, the words seemed to simply erupt out of him like they were both the most obvious statement of truth and his biggest, most profound secret. "I am in love with you!"
Beckett sucked in a breath, her eyes closing over. "Don't. Castle. Please."
His voice softened as he went on, as he took a few steps towards her. "Whether you remember me saying the words or not, I know you know. You are a smart woman and you had my number from the moment we met. You can't not know. I'm just not that subtle." He waved a hand, searching his mind for the proof she'd trained him to provide. "I've…dedicated two books to you, I don't do that for just anyone, you know. I, I gave up James Bond for you. Do you have any idea how huge that was for me? Not to mention paying thousands of dollars just for a shot at the man who killed your mom."
At that she seemed to bristle, her spine stiffening and eyes flashing. "So what, I owe you? Is that what you're saying?"
"This is not about obligation. It's about honesty." He retreated to the table with a sigh, hitching one thigh on a corner, his shoulders slumping. "I am being honest with you here. I thought I could wait forever. Turns out…I can't. This is my limit."
Beckett was silent a moment, studying him. Then her head tilted to one side. "You're giving me an ultimatum?" she murmured finally, though it was more statement than question.
"I'm asking," he replied, attempting to keep his voice even, "for the same honesty from you. I'm asking for a straight answer."
"On what exactly?"
"You really need me to spell it out?"
Again, she was silent. Then she moved a little closer. "Look, Castle, we…can't do this here." She looked down at her hands, lifted one to tuck some hair behind her ear before telling him quietly, carefully, "We can talk. If you want, after the case is over. But not here, not now. Okay? I need…time. To think about this." She gave a small nod and turned to the door.
Castle caught her arm, preventing her escape. "How long…do you expect me to wait?"
Beckett glanced down at his fingers curled loosely about her arm, before her gaze climbed slowly up to his. "What do you mean?"
"I mean – realistically," he murmured, looking up at her from where he sat, "how long do you expect me to wait for you? Have you actually thought about that? Is there a timeframe in mind here at all? Or do you just expect me to stay on ice until you give the green light?"
She hesitated, brow crumpled. Then she fell back, her arm slipping from his grasp as her back met the one-way glass. "I…I thought you understood, Castle. What I need to do. We…you and I talked about this."
"Yeah, we did," he nodded, his voice as low as hers and just as serious. He rose from the table, took one cautious step closer. "And I say this with absolute respect for your mom and all you've been through. But tell me this—" he paused, waiting until her eyes connected with his, "what difference is a name going to make? It's just a name."
"Not to me, it's not," she answered him resolutely. "This is not about a name, it's about justice. For myself, for my dad, for—"
"It won't bring her back," he interjected gently.
"You think I don't know that?" she demanded, eyes narrowing to angry slits.
"I think…" he took another deep breath and another step closer, "that the only person who can bring down that wall you spoke of is in this room. It isn't some Harvard educated shrink, however brilliant. It isn't some elusive criminal mastermind who for all we know may remain at large for the rest of our lives. And it isn't me. Though God knows, I've given it my best shot. Knowing the identity of that man, whatever he has done to your family, is not going to make that inner wall magically dissipate. I have been waiting, hoping for the day that you realize that that…is entirely up to you." He lent closer, voice dropping to an urgent whisper and eyes sparkling with a desperate hope. "You can do anything you put your mind to, Kate, I have absolute faith in that fact. And I am here, ready and willing to help you with any heavy lifting. If you'll let me. Will you? Are you going to let me do that?"
Her eyes remained locked with his for a long moment, exposing all the emotion she generally hid so well. "I'm so nearly ready, Castle," she whispered eventually, "I'm so close."
He lowered his face to hers, letting his body invade her space, letting the physical pull that had always existed between them do its part in swaying her. "How close? How close are you, Kate?"
Her lips parted but nothing emerged. Her gaze dropped to his mouth, her breath coming faster and shallower with his proximity. Her body tilted forward, teetering on the edge as though drawn to his by pure gravitational force.
"Speak to me…" he entreated, eyes fixed on her mouth. "Open your mouth and tell me this is going to happen."
"And by this," she puffed, her chest rising and falling heavily, "you mean…"
"Us," he answered without a shred of doubt or hesitation in his tone. "You and me. And this thing that's always been there. Always and always." He paused, eyes scanning her face one last time. "Tell me you feel it too, tell me the truth. Because, so help me, I am ready to walk out that door if you don't."
She shook her head, one hand finding his chest, grasping his jacket. "I don't want that."
He leant closer, his face etched with angst and mere millimeters from hers. "Then give me a reason to stay. Speak, Kate, speak. What's it gonna be? Yes…or no?"
Her mouth worked wordlessly for a moment, opening and closing without any real answer making it to the surface. All that came out was a wavering: "Castle…"
He waited an extra moment, needing some commitment, craving some miniscule confirmation from her. But when her eyes drifted away from his, he released his held breath. Watching her face lower and her mouth close and her jaw set, Castle drew back, finally admitting defeat. He nodded once to himself then walked slowly to the door.
"You know…we all have a wall inside of us," he murmured after a moment, standing on the threshold, one hand on the doorknob. "I let mine down for you," he told her before giving a rueful little smile, "Or maybe you just karate-kicked it down and left me no choice." His smile disappeared, his spine straightened. "Well—" he gave a nod of finality, "Detective. Good luck with the case. If you change your mind…you know where you can find me."
Then Kate Beckett watched as Rick Castle left.
TBC...
