AN: Homestuck belongs to Andrew Hussie

The Book of Mormon belongs to Matt Stone and Trey Parker

Dave: Hello! My name is Elder Strider

And I would like to share with you the most amazing book

Rose: Hello! My name is Sister Lalonde

It's a book about America a long, long time ago

It has so many awesome parts

You simply won't believe how much this book can change your life

Jade: Hello! My name is Sister Harley

I would like to share with you this book of The Sufferer

Jane: Hello! My name is Sister Crocker

Did you know that The Signless lived here in the USA?

You can read all about it now

In this nifty book, it's free! No, you don't have to pay

Jake: Hello! My name is Elder English

And can I leave this book with you for you to just peruse?

Hello! I'll just leave it here

It has a lot of information you can really use

Many at once: Hello! My name is –

You have a lovely home

It's an amazing book!

Bonjour! Ni Hao!

This book gives you the secret to eternal life

Eternal life –

Is super fun!

And if you let us in we'll show you how it can be done!

You sure?

That's fine

Have fun in hell

You simply won't believe how much this book will change your life

This book will change your life

This book will change your life

This book will change your life

This book will change your life!

John: Hello! Would you like to change religions? I have a free book written by Jegus!

Big Boomy Voice From The Sky: No, no Elder Egbert! That's not how we do it! You're making things up again. Just stick to the approved dialogue. Elders, show him!

Many at once: Hello!

My name is –

John: Elder Egbert!

MAT: And we would like to share with you this book of The Sufferer!

Hello!

Hello!

Ding dong!

Heigh ho!

Just take this book!

It's free!

For you!

From me!

You see?

You simply won't believe how much this book will change your life!

This book will change your life!

So you won't burn in...

Hell-o! You're gonna die someday!

But if you read this book you'll see that there's another way

Spend eternity with friends and family

We can fully guarantee you that this book will change your life

This book will change your life!

This book will change your life!

This book will change your life!

The Book of Homestuck!

Hello!

AN: 8luh, I'm gonna go die now. XXXXP

I saw the Book of Mormon on Broadway awhile ago, and the whole time all I could think of is the cast as homestuck characters. Its terrible I know, but hey, I fucking tried, and its 12 in the morning, shit happens