Technically no one owns Human!Perry. All the same since I've recently been obsessed with Human!Perry story's. I've been reading them like an addict. Writing this makes me feel a bit like a thief. I had to write this though since it's the only thing I don't have writers block on and I thought it was okay so...please no hate.
Curled up at the end of Ferbs bed Perry opened one eye. He got up and nudged his owner hoping to be fed before his early mission today. Having no luck with Ferb he nudged Phineas who sat up and yawned.
"Wow its early Perry. Do you wanna play boy?"
Perry blinked his spaced out eyes.
"Do you need to go outside?"
Perry blinked again.
"Are you hungry boy?"
Perry chattered yes.
"I wish I knew what you wanted. You'd be so easy to understand if we were the same species. That's it! Ferb I know what we're gonna do today!"
Oh well. Perry thought. As long as his mission didn't take too long he'd be fine. He was a little hungry though so he nudged Ferb again.
Ferb rubbed his eyes drowsily and patted Perrys head.
"Ferb! We should create a machine that could turn us into platypuses! Or platy pie...platy people?"
"There is actually no universally accepted plural for platypus."
"Oh yeah that's right Ferb! Well what do you think? I think it'll be fun being a platypus! And we can follow Perry to see where he goes every day!"
Perry gulped and took this as his chance to disappear. He slipped into the hallway and stood on two legs. He put his fedora on and breathed on a picture of Phineas and Ferb holding him. He rubbed the fog with his small teal hand and smiled when the picture shined. Then the floor opened under him and he slid down a tube into his swivel chair. He spun around to see Monogram on the screen, but fast asleep.
"Sir Agent P is here!" Carl said from the back round. "Sir!"
Perry raised an eyebrow and smiled slightly. He was so bringing this up at the next O.W.C.A Christmas party.
Getting no response from Monogram, Carl aimed the camera at himself. "Sorry about this early mission agent P! We need you to go thwart Doofinsmirtz since he has a dentist's appointment around your normal time. Um...good luck agent P!" Carl said with a salute.
Perry saluted back and climbed into his scale sized hover car, taking to the skies.
Down in the Flynn Fletcher yard Isabella stepped beyond the gate to ask the boys a question.
"What'cha doin?" Then panning her eyes over the boys and scrunching up her nose she asked. "And what are you wearing?"
"We're going to turn ourselves into platypuses!" Phineas said excitedly. "And we're wearing special suits that will shrink to platypus size with us and grow back to human size when we turn back. Ferb designed them!"
Despite the fact that that was incredible, Isabella was unimpressed. "All black Ferb?"
"Pardon me for not having a brighter color scheme." He retorted playfully.
"I know a few girls who can help you with this fashion crisis!" She exclaimed.
Back with Perry, who, had just landed on Doofinsmirtz roof as the jingle played.
Doofinsmirtz was unshaven and looked tired. "Let's get this over with okay? I have a dentist appointment later and I have to wait in a waiting room. Which reminds me!"
Doofinsmirtz pressed a button and a dentist's chair sprang up under Perry and lashed him to itself. Perry struggled for a moment as he waited for Doofinsmirtz to begin his monologue.
"You see Perry the platypus ever since I was a young boy in Drusslestinia I've been forced to watch people walk in and get what they want while I still have to wait in line. It's no fair Perry the platypus! So I've invented this!"
Behind him a light shone and Perry looked up to see a terrifying picture of young Vanessa giving an angry glare.
Doofinsmirtz looked behind himself. "Oh no this is a picture of my daughter Vanessa. I mean this!" The light shone again revealing a large metal ray. "I call it the reverserinator! It makes things do the opposite of what they would normally do! It will make refrigerators heat food and beds will keep people awake and...well I don't know how it will affect people I haven't tried it out yet..." Doof coughed. "But I'm sure it will be sinister!"
Perry scoffed and rolled his eyes.
"What you don't believe me Perry the platypus? Watch this!" He aimed the machine at his refrigerator and pressed the button. Afterwards he opened the door. "See Perry the platypus now all the food is-." Doof gagged. "Oh that smells really bad!"
While his nemesis was distracted Perry moved his arm out from underneath the strap and unbuckled himself. Still reeling from the smell Doofinsmirtz didn't see Perry until the agent kicked him in the side of his face. Perry then began pushing buttons on the inator to overload it.
"No Perry the platypus don't you'll-." Perry pulled Doofinsmirtz down so that none of the rapid blasts from the inator would hit him. One blast went all the way to the Flynn Fletcher yard in the middle of a musical number with strobe lights. They didn't notice the flash and continued to sing about what the world would be like in the eyes of a semi aquatic mammal.
The inator exploded and Perry jumped into his hover car flying away as Doofinsmirtz yelled. "Curse you Perry the- oh the fridge reeks! Curse you Perry the platypus!"
A while later Perry crawled into the backyard. "Oh there you are Perry." Phineas observed. "Okay guys ready to join Perry in the metromere world?"
"Phineas!" Candace yelled slamming the gate open. "What are you boys up to?"
Perry who'd been behind the gate was knocked through the boy's machine. It whirred to life and glowed. Inside Perry gulped. "What's happening?" He yelled. Then he gasped and covered his mouth. Yes mouth. He wasn't a platypus anymore...
