On the Way Down
By: The wonderful writing styles of Abbie and JoJo.
A/N: I hope you like this. I was listening to the radio and I heard 'On the Way Down' by Ryan Cabrera and I thought 'That would make a wonderful Fic.' And I thought I could have like a Talent Show thing. But JoJo pointed out that that was way over done.
Summary: Sirius hears singing and unintentionally falls in love with the anonymous singer.
Disclaimer: If you have found this fic. You must know already that it has Slash. But just in case you didn't know, I am warning you now.
I have been going crazy ever since Harry and I had come to Hogwarts to fill our newly appointed jobs; the Astronomy and Defense Against the Dark Arts Professors.
Flash Back
Harry had been happy to stay with his godfather, Sirius Black, after the summer of his 7th year at Hogwarts. In the end of the final, gruesome, bloody, battle with Voldemort, the light side, lead by Harry Potter and Albus Dumbledore stood victorious. Not long after was the 'Ministry' quick to capture and question the very much alive Pert Pettigrew, aka, Wormtail.
After Wormtail had been thoroughly questioned under a heavy dosage of veritaserum, he had unwillingly confessed to everything. Headlines cried his scandals and betrayal for the weeks into the aftermath; Peter Pettigrew- Secret Keeper?', 'The framing of Sirius Black', 'The cold Murder of the Potters', and even 'An Eye for an Eye- the Punishment?'.
Almost instantly, Sirius had been instantly set free and placed on a proverbial pedestal next to his godson. The Ministry gladly gave a hefty sum to compensate for the years lost to him.
'Like any amount of money could make up for that.' Sirius had raved in front of the Daily Prophet reporters after Fudge had painted the Ministry as innocent bystanders to the evil going on during the war. Sadly, and yet most predictably, that's just what the Ministry was; a bystander. They sat back as the Order of the Phoenix fought Voldemort's forces, only there to twist the facts to give to the public and award medals when all was well again.
Sirius and Harry had been groggily sitting in the kitchen, reluctantly reading 'the trash' as Sirius called it, when an unknown owl flew through the opened window and into the kitchen. Harry slowly retrieved the letters, and offered the owl some water and a few bread crumbs. The letters had official looking seals on them that Harry automatically recognized as the Hogwarts crest.
"This one is addressed to you," Harry said curiously, handing the letter to Sirius. "But I wonder what Dumbledore wants with us. I already got my NEWT results back."
"I don't know, why don't you open them and find out," Sirius muttered, obviously interested.
Harry torn open the envelope and scanned the contents, his eyes widening in shock.
"What is it, Harry?" Sirius asked curiously.
"I have some good news, more good news, and some news that could be good or bad." Harry mumbled eyes stilled glued on the parchment.
"Well, let's hear it then." Sirius asked. He himself hadn't yet had a chance to read the letter addressed to him.
"Ok, well that old bat, Gomoll, finally decided to leave Hogwarts. He was the first teacher of Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher that stayed for over a year. I got the highest NEWT grade in the whole graduating class, even better then Hermione. Since Gomoll decided to leave, they want me to be the new Defense Against the Dark Arts professor. What do you think Sirius?" Harry asked, his voice shaking a small bit.
Meanwhile, Sirius, who had finally read through his own letter and only half listens to Harry talking, had his mouth open.
"Sirius, what is it?" Harry asked curious.
"I think-I think, that means we are going to be working at Hogwarts together. Bloody Hell." Sirius said dumbfounded.
"What?" Harry squeaked in surprised.
"The astronomy teacher finally decided to retire, good thing too, he was teaching when I went there. Apparently, when I was in school I scored the highest on the Newt's since Dumbledore took the test, apart from Hermione, of course."
Both were ecstatic to be working with each other. They eagerly wrote replies accepting their respective job offers, and a few days later returned to Hogwarts.
End Flashback
I, Sirius Black, have been going crazy, ever since the new Hogwarts year had started.
I had begun to walk around the castle at nine every night. Every time, just before I would head to my office and grade some papers, the same mysterious voice drifted down the corridor.
With a melody so sad, one could not help but to hold the singer in their arms forever. You could hear the emotions behind the song, yearning for something that was never there; a missing part of themselves. It made me want to cry.
'Sick and tired of this world
There's no more air
Tripping over myself,
going nowhere
Waiting, suffocating,
no direction I took a dive and
On the way down I saw you,
and you saved me from myself
And I won't forget the way you loved me
And on the way down
I almost fell right through
But I held on to you
Been wondering why
it's only me
Have you always been inside
waiting to breathe It's alright,
sunlight on my face
I wake up and yet,
I'm alive 'cuz
On the way down
I saw you, and you saved me from myself
And I won't forget the way you loved me
And on the way down I almost fell right through
But I held on to you
I want to fade,
I'm going under
But now, the weight of the world
Feels like nothing, nothing (down, down, down)
You're all I wanted (down, down, down)
You're all I needed (down, down, down
You're all I wanted
You're all I needed
And I won't forget the way you loved me
All that I wanted,
all that I needed and now
On the way down
I saw you, and you saved me from myself
And I won't forget the way you loved me
And on the way down
I almost fell right through
But I held on to you'
Harry's POV
I was going crazy. I had, of course, heard that Albus had wanted me as Hogwarts' new DADA teacher, but I never really thought of it as more than a silly rumor, fabricated by the student population at Hogwarts because I was, and still am, The-Boy-Who-Lived. It was certainly a shock when I was holding the formal invitation in my sweaty palms, trying to tell Sirius what had just happened. On one hand, there was joy at the prospect of once again living at the place that had truly become my home throughout my seven years there. However, there was Sirius. They had been making up for lost time when this came in, completely out of the blue, but when Sirius was offered a position, I knew we had to go. Cunning man, Dumbledore…
Maybe it was Hogwarts herself. Maybe it was being around young lovers, kissing and holding hands. Maybe it was a life time of no real affection finally catching up with him. All excuses aside, I had come to the conclusion that Sirius Black was gorgeous. The way his hair would lightly fall over his eyes was so…unbearably sexy.
I had, at first, just brushed it off as pent up sexual frustration. I knew I needed a good shag. But then one day I realized that I wasn't just looking at Sirius' body, but his body language, how you could instantly tell by the way he walked, the way he felt. The way he was always and eternally innocent. The way he was always a kid at heart no matter the situation. That was the day I realized.
I sighed. This was wrong, immoral. My parents would kill me; hell Mrs. Wesley would kill me. Sirius is my godfather for fucks sake. I shouldn't be feeling like this for the man. I sighed.
One day while in the shower, I found myself singing. Singing to Sirius, or what I would sing to him if I could ever gather the courage to tell him how I felt. It helped my feel more like I had, in a way, told Sirius of my feelings. Or had, at least, in some way expressed my feelings.
I knew that my feelings weren't normal, that others, including Sirius, would think me sick. So I kept my feelings lock inside him. Until my ritual shower, starting at 8:50 pm and ending at 9:30, as if on a timer. All the while, singing away to Sirius. Telling him through song how he feels.
The shower was a place where I could let go. Let out my feelings, with no reserve. I just wished Sirius knew that what I was singing I was for him. The deep throaty notes pouring out of my mouth kept me sane. And they were beautiful.
Sirius' POV
I was going to go crazy if I didn't soon find out who that mystery singer was soon. I had to find the one that held his heart.
I leaned over to talk to Harry at the breakfast table, as usual. It was about mid November and I was planning on telling Harry about his mystery singer today.
'Harry, hey guess what?'
'What?' Harry asked curiously.
'I think I know who my true love is.'
'You do? Who is it?' I could hear something in Harry's voice but I didn't know exactly what.
'Yes, I do have a true love. But I don't know who yet. I just know that I love them, who ever my mystery person is.' I said as if in a daze.
'Oh, well I am really happy for you.' Harry said patting me on my arm. I heard that twinge in Harry's voice but this time it was more prominent. I didn't know what it was, but I knew it wasn't good.
Remus' POV
'Sev, honey, look at them. You know they are in love. Sirius is just clueless. Harry knows it. But Sirius is too …well you know how Siri gets' I said grinning.
'Remus, that is just disgusting.' Severus Snape said in revulsion.
'But you know it is true.' I countered.
'Yes, it is true, but Black is just oblivious. I heard him last night walking around listening to Potter sing and he look as though he was in love. Bloody fool. You know what the sad thing is? He didn't even realize it was Potter. But, darling, next time please refrain from talking about Potter and Black at the table, especially while I am trying to eat.' With that Severus Snape returned to his corn-beef hash and grits.
Sirius' POV
I was going to follow that voice tonight. I had resolved that I had to tell my mystery singer. I was going to tell him, for I was sure that it was a he, tonight. I had gathered the courage today. I had prepped himself, and now I was going to act upon it.
Harry's POV
It was 8:55 pm and as usual I was getting into my shower, but tonight I didn't feel like singing. All I felt like doing was crying. The one I held do close to my heart had fallen for another? 'Should I tell Sirius?' Sirius seemed so happy this morning and even happier this evening during dinner. I just wanted to sit under the hot water and cry.
So that is what I did. I cried. All the way through my shower.
Sirius' POV
I was walking, waiting to hear the singing I walked back and forth through the hall. However, it never came. Something much worse did.
I heard the most gut wrenching crying. Each sob tore at my heart and resolved I to find this miserable creature.
I followed the hapless cries. They lead me down passageways, and down a corridor. Finally, I stood at a door.
Is this the person that has been singing?
If this isn't my singing true love, then why aren't they singing?
Does it matter? This person is crying. My dream can come later.
They sound so sad. What happened to make this person so sad?
I timidly knocked on the door.
Harry's POV
I had finished his shower, but a few stray tears still escaped me. Exhausted, I stepped out of the shower.
Knock. Knock.
I wonder who could be coming to visit me at this hour?
I wiped my eyes, and hurried to secure the towel around my waist.
Knock. Knock.
'Coming,' I called heading towards the door, curious to see who had come to see me at this time of night.
I reached the door and opened it to reveal a shockingly familiar face.
It was Sirius.
Sirius' POV
The door opened slowly, and I would be lying if I said that he was surprised to see my godson on the other side.
'Harry?' I asked, my voice coming out more confident than I thought it would.
'Oh, hey, Sirius. What are you doing here at this hour?'
'Harry it is only 9:30pm. That hardly constitutes as late.' I said, hiding my concern behind my playful mask.
'Well, yeah.' Harry sounded as though he had been just crying.
Well, oh course he was crying. I just heard him crying his heart out.
'Why were you crying?'
Is Harry the one that has been singing? What made him so sad?
'Oh, well it was nothing. How did you hear me?' What do I say?
The truth usually works.
'I walk this way every night.'
'You do?' Harry said sounding a little curious, even though he voice still came out as if stifling a sob.
Harry's POV
'Why were you crying?' Sirius asked sounding genuinely curious.
I don't need to bother him with my problems.
'Oh, it was nothing.' Wait, how did he know I was crying? And how did he hear me? 'How did you hear me?'
'I walk this way every night.'
This jerked my nerves. And surprised me just a little. No!
'You do?' I asked panicked.
'There's this person that I listen to every night. They sing a muggle song and every time I hear it, I swear, I get the feeling it's for me. I care for them a great deal already, possibly even love. Silly, I know, but still…' Sirius broke off, hiding his reddening cheeks. 'I know it might sound strange, but I came to listen again. I was actually going to tell them about how I feel tonight. But they weren't singing, and then I heard you crying.'
Sirius hears someone singing? That's me! That's me! He loves me! He thinks I am his true love!
What should I do now? I have certainly never been in this situation.
'Harry? You in there?' Sirius waved a hand in front of my face. 'Harry, I really would like to know why you were crying.' But Harry wasn't listening.
'Sirius, listen.' I cleared my throat.
'Sick and tired of this world
There's no more air
Tripping over myself, going nowhere
Waiting, suffocating, no direction
I took a dive and
On the way down I saw you, and you saved me from myself
And I won't forget the way you loved me
And on the way down I almost fell right through
But I held on to you'
I waited for Sirius' response. I would wait forever.
Sirius's POV
But how can my true love be Harry?
The feelings are there, though. I just know that Harry, is my true love. I can just tell. I can feel that he is the one I was meant to be with.
'It was you.' was all I could say, disbelief clear in my voice.
'Yes,' was all Harry said in response. His voice was shaking.
'Were you singing to me?' I asked scared.
'Yes.' Again was all Harry said.
'You're my true love?' I asked in a daze. I am so happy. If some one asked me today I could do anything. What if he doesn't want me? (abbie: asked him what?)
'I want to be.' Harry said, swallowing
'I love you, Harry Potter.' I whispered as our lips met in a tender caress.
Remus' PoV
I leaned over to Severus at the breakfast table.
'Sev, honey, look over there at Sirius and Harry.' I told my lover, eagerly.
'Remy, did I not ask you repeatedly to please not talk about Potter and Black around me when I am eating?' Severus Snape replied with disgust apparent in his voice.
'OK, fine. Well, about those two people you don't like me to talk about; well it looks like they finally caught a hint.' I countered happily.
I saw my lover eagerly, yet trying to be discreetly, turn around, pretending to stretch, and saw Sirius and Harry, secretly, yet not very secretly, holding hands under the table.
I could have sworn that I saw my Sev have a hint of a smile on his lips, for a split second, when he turned around.
Fin
Note to readers: Well, besides obviously reviewing. Would anyone that has any details on a fic I was reading please e-mail me directly at either: or or . And I will love you forever. And grant you one wish.
I accidentally lost the link to this fic when I had to abruptly get off AOL. The fic was a HP/SB fic. It was about: Harry was staying with the Weasley's over the summer. And he had apparently been with FW/GW for a while. He saw Sirius one night. But then nothing happened. He broke up with Fred and George. Then when Sirius came out in the open and was a professor at Hogwarts Harry seduced him. And they fell in love. But there wasn't that much detail about that. And they had a relationship. Then they got found out by people. But people in Gryffindor Tower already know. (I am not 100 sure about this. But I do know that some people already knew. And some knew about Fred and George. But they were a secret.) And they had to have a trial to see if it was OK for them to be together. And if they didn't say it was OK then Sirius would have to go away. But Harry said he would run away too. And in the trial (What I remember of it) they questioned Harry and Sirius. But they had to lie about a few things. (Like FW/GW) But yet again there wasn't too much detail in this.
But, seriously, if anyone knows, even anything, or inkling about this fic please tell me. I will love you and do anything within my limited abilities. I am on my hands and knees. : Gets on hands and knees and crawls and begs: Because right now I can't even remember what the title is or if it is even an fic or a PSA fic. Please help me!
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