Here, Let Me:
What We Could Have Been
"Jus?" He swats his hand away
"Yes?" Wade puts a finger under his chin tilting it up. Justin starts to blush. "Wade? Why do you look so serious?"
"I love you."
"You do?"
"Of course I do. Why wouldn't I?" Justin shrugs self-consciously
"I don't know. I do have extraordinary swag."
"Oh Jesus."
"I do."
"So?"
"So what?"
"Don't you love me?"
"Wade…" Wade hastily launches himself off the bed and stalks toward the bathroom and Justin goes after him. "Wade! I didn't mean that…" Wade slams the door in his face. He knocks
"Go away!"
"I didn't mean that the way it came out."
"I don't care. Go away."
"You don't really want me to do that do you baba?" Wade yanks the door open and leans into Justin's face
"The fuck did I say?" He tears up, grabs his sweatpants and leaves the room. Wade tossed and turned all night thinking about how he'd made a fool of himself. Really, why would Justin love him? He was 31 and had just lost his virginity a month ago. Justin was only taking pity on him. Honestly, he's gorgeous and could have anyone he wanted and he'd picked Wade
"Just to fuck with me." Wade throws the sheets back and leaves the bedroom to go get a glass of water. On his way down the hall he passes the guest room and stops when he thinks he hears crying on the other side of the door. He reaches for the doorknob but stops himself when he remembers what Justin said…or what he didn't say. Having second thoughts Wade continues down the hall then downstairs to the kitchen. The next three days passed slowly which would have been delightful had Wade not been sharing his house with someone he couldn't stand at the moment. Before leaving for the airport Justin knocks softly on Wade's bedroom door. Wade sighs
"Come in."
"Um, I just came to ask you what you wanted to do about the room situation."
"What room situation?"
"We were sharing a room on the road and I just wanted to be clear on the situation before we get to the hotel."
"Unless you just want to be the warm somebody beneath me when I'm horny, I suggest we get different rooms."
"You know…never mind. The car will be here in ten minutes." When Justin shuts the door Wade hurls a bottle of water at the door and watches it explode. Justin jumps away from the door and scurries down the hall to the guest room. They ride to the airport in silence and fly to the next city the same way. When they check into the hotel Wade decides to room by himself while Justin partners up with Heath knowing that he'll have to explain what's going on
"So, Gabriel, what's going on?" Not explain this soon though
"Going on with what Heath?"
"Don't play innocent with me. Those big brown eyes don't make me melt. I much prefer deep blue ones."
"Where is Drew?"
"He's not needed on RAW so he has to fly out for Smackdown. Now, back to you."
"What were we talking about again?"
"Boy, would you spill it already? You and the English giant seemed to be getting hot and heavy and now you're rooming with me and he's alone. What gives?" Justin sighs and sits on the bed. "Oh man, this isn't going to be good."
"He told me he loved me the other night after we had sex and I didn't say it back so he thinks I don't love him and he won't talk to me and when he does he just says something really mean and I don't know what to do about it or him." He takes a deep breath
"Jesus man…take a rest."
"Did you hear anything I said?"
"Barely. Why didn't you say anything to him? Like, I don't know. I love you too."
"I…"
"Do you love him Justin?"
"I – I…"
"Damn if you were this hesitant I can understand why he's not talking to you."
"Heath." He puts his arms in the air
"I'm just saying. Now answer my question. Do you love him or not?"
"Yes." Heath just sits there staring at him
"…so what's the problem?"
"I don't know if he really loves me or if it was a heat of the moment thing. And if it was I don't want him to know that I really do love him."
"You're cute but you got no brains."
"What?"
"That's what love's all about. Taking chances. You need to let him know before he goes berserk Justin." Justin looks at him inquisitively
"Is that what love's about? Taking chances?"
"I don't know. It sounded like the right thing you needed to hear at the moment. Just tell him because I was serious about the berserk part."
"He's not going to talk to me."
"Then keep trying." And that's just what he did. All week with no response, other than grunts, from Wade. He got the same reaction the very next week. Going back to the townhouse would normally have been a great thing but not this time. An hour after they get there Wade knocks on the door
"Come in Wade."
"You know, this is my place so I shouldn't have to knock on doors."
"Do you want me to thank you?"
"You could but that won't be necessary. I came in here to tell you that I think it's best if you get the stuff that you have here and go back to your place."
"I assumed as much so I've already packed it. When I get my clothes washed and dried I'm out of here."
"Very well then." Wade grunts, turns on his heal and heads back to his room
"Fucking idiot."
"What did you say?" Justin looks up
"Huh? I thought you were gone."
"I bet you did. Did you call me a fucking idiot?"
"Yea, I did because you are."
"You're right, I am. I'm an idiot for ever trusting you. I'm an idiot for ever trying with you. I'm an idiot for telling you how I felt. I…"
"Would you shut up already? I get it you're an idiot but I already knew that."
"Don't test me Gabriel."
"Go back to your room and leave me alone."
"You have some nerve speaking to me that way in my house."
"Whatever. Just leave."
"You're kicking me out of my own guest room?"
"Yes! Leave!"
Monday Night RAW: 02.20.2012
"Still watching his matches I see?" Justin looks up at Heath
"Why wouldn't I watch?"
"Because he's been ignoring you and has been rather rude. I heard what he said when you tried talking to him earlier."
"Yea well, I still enjoy wrestling and I'm still a fan." Justin turns his attention back to the television just in time to see Dolph Ziggler fly over the rope and Wade put his arms up to cushion the fall…then scream out fuck
"Oh my God!" He jumps up and pushes past Heath. Justin waits in gorilla until the trainers bring Wade back through the curtain. "Are you okay?"
"Do I honestly look okay to you? Justin pauses
"Well, no I guess you don't. If you need someone to ride with you to the hospital I'll go." Wade just grunts
A Few Days Later
"Would you stop fussing over me, Gabriel?"
"Sorry. You just look so helpless." Wade looks at him. "Sorry. You know what I meant." Wade opens his mouth as if he were going to say something then closes it. "What?"
"Nothing."
"Spill it Barrett."
"I have to have surgery."
"What? I thought that it was just dislocated."
"So did the doctors at first."
"I'm sorry to hear that."
"No you're not."
"You're right I'm not. I wish you needed surgery on both elbows…and both knees."
"You're terrible at being mean, you know that? Why are you being so good to me?"
"I've always been good to you but I didn't get it in return."
"…you weren't always good to me."
"Sure I was. There was one time you just didn't let me." Wade shakes his head
"And you'll be good to me after the surgery? You'll be here if and when I need you?"
"Of course. I never left you."
"Why? I was a pig-headed brute."
"Why? Because I love you you big dumb jackass." Wade looks at him
"Don't toy with me."
"I'm not. I was overwhelmed when you said it but you didn't give me a chance to explain myself." Wade breaks out into a big goofy grin and Justin laughs. "I love you baba."
"I love you too Angel."
