He was sitting there, between his friends and group members. They were all laughing and talking about the series they were watching together. It was Monty Python's flying circus, a series that they'd filmed a while earlier. But despite his friends' happiness, he felt nothing. He could laugh about the jokes, but only because his brain told him there was something funny, not because he really enjoyed it.
John had been depressed for a few years now. Recently, there had been a few moments where he thought he'd actually felt something, something happy, something good. But it had faded every time, as had the hope for the future. Suddenly he felt someone staring at him. He looked around him and saw Eric.
"Are you alright?" Eric asked. John shrugged. Eric stood up and sat next to him. "I wish I knew what depression is like, then I could help you." He said. John looked up and shook his head. "You don't deserve that."
Eric raised his eyebrows. "And you do?" He asked. John nodded and looked down. "I failed in life." He said. Eric put an arm around him. "Oh, come on, don't say that. Look where you are now, only five other people can say that!"
John nodded hesitating. "But I'm not worth it." He said. Eric sighed. "Let's go somewhere a bit quieter." He stood up, dragging John with him. The others didn't even notice them leaving, as that was just the moment the lumberjack song began to play.
They walked upstairs to Eric's study (they were in Eric's house), and Eric sat down on the ground leaning against the wall, gesturing for John to come sit next to him. They sat there for about five minutes, not speaking one word.
"I think I want to die." John suddenly interrupted the silence. Eric looked up. "If you do that, I'll kill you." He said. John forced a smile and rested his head on Eric's shoulder. "But what if I'd kill myself... would you miss me? Or anyone?" He looked up into Eric's eyes. "Of course. You're a real comedian. You can't see how funny you actually are, because you already know your jokes. But other people like you more than you can ever think." Eric said. John looked into his eyes to see if he really meant what he said, but he couldn't find any lies there.
"Thank you."
