Every Dog Has His Day
By Sharan McQuack, Launchpad's wife
With thanks to Stretch Snodgrass, who gave me this idea.
Guess what? This story stars DUCKWORTH!
It was quiet in McDuck mansion. Mr. McDuck, the kids and Launchpad and I had gone on one of our (1) adventures. Mrs. Beakly had taken advantage of her granddaughter's absence to go shopping, which is a lot easier without an 8 year old in tow.
Duckworth had the mansion all to himself. Duckworth was thinking, as he often did, about how he had all the advantages of being rich without any of the hassles. He lived in a fine mansion. He wore fine clothes, ate good food and could look at expensive works of art- actually, he had more time to look at Mr. McDuck's paintings and sculptures than Mr. McDuck did!
Of course, he did have to drive Mr. McDuck around. And do housework. But if he had a "normal" job, he'd still have to do his own housework and drive to and from work everyday.
" It is humiliating", he thought , as he took the garbage out, but then firmly reminded himself he'd have to take his own garbage out regardless.
Duckworth looked up to see someone. A most unwelcomed someone.
"YOU! What are YOU doing HERE?" Duckworth asked.
"Now, now, mate, is that any way to talk to your own mate, Giles Glives ? And I thought we was such good friends!" Giles replied.
"We were good friends, once when you and I were school chums. But that was a long time ago, before you went wicked. Before you tried to rope me into a life of crime. I left for America to get as far away from you as I could! Leave! You are NOT welcome here!" Duckworth demanded.
"Now why would I want to do that when you and me got business to discuss? Seems to me, your boss might like to know about what good friends you and me are. You ain't never told him about me, did you now?" Giles asked.
"There was nothing to tell him. I stood up for you once, when I thought the accusations against you were false. When I found out you were a criminal, after all, I was very disappointed and broke off our friendship. I hoped to never see you again." Duckworth said.
"And if I was to tell Scrooge McDuck, the world's richest duck that you were friends with a bloke like me? Me with more arrests on my record than he's got money? If I was to tell him how you defended me against those who accused me of stealing?" Giles asked.
"That was years ago! We were both boys….I believed you to be innocent! Of course I defended you, I thought we were friends!" Duckworth replied.
"But it would look bad, now wouldn't it? With you never mentioning me to him before, like I figured you wouldn't?" Giles asked.
"If you are trying to blackmail me, you should know that Mr. McDuck…." Duckworth began.
"Pays you plum little? Is that supposed to be a surprise? I don't want your money! I want your help… ever heard of an organization called Hydrant?" (1) Giles asked.
"I believe Mr. McDuck mentioned such an organization of misguided fools! About how he and Launchpad destroyed their headquarters." Duckworth replied.
"Hah! A mere setback and an unimportant one! We shall win over Ducks, yet!" Giles said.
"WE" shall do nothing of the sort. Most dogs would want nothing to do with you, or this foolish organization of which you speak! Please leave, I have no wish to help you nor the pack of fools you apparently run with!" Duckworth said, firmly.
"Who said I was giving you a choice?" Giles asked.
Later that evening, Mr. McDuck , the boys and Webby came home. Mrs. Beakly had returned earlier and greeted her granddaughter, scolding her for being out so late.
"Duckworth- prepare one of the spare rooms for Launchpad and Sharan!" Mr. McDuck said.
"Thanks, Duckworth, I'm beat! Sharan must be, too!" Launchpad said.
It was then that poor Duckworth found could no longer shoulder his burden alone. He started crying like a baby. It wasn't long before Launchpad heard the whole story.
" I think I can call somebody who might be able to help." Launchpad suggested.
So Launchpad connected SHUSH. Soon Littleduck appeared and he had Duckworth repeat the story.
"Would you be willing to pretend to "go along" with Giles? To spy on Hydrant and find out what they are up to? It will be dangerous…." Littleduck warned.
"I am not the bravest of dogs. But if it would mean getting rid of Giles before he ruins my life, or destroys the trust Mr. McDuck has in me, it would be worth it!" Duckworth said.
So Duckworth waited for Giles to return. It did not take long.
"Are you ready to play ball? Or do I tell Scroogie what good friends we are and let him jump to conclusions? " Giles asked.
"Very well. If I wish to keep my job, I see I have no choice. But I will help just this once and never again...is that clear?" Duckworth replied.
"You do your part and there won't have to be a next time. See this? It's an exact copy of the Lucky Dime, down to the last dent. And a fine time we had getting photos of the original!" Giles began.
"If you expect me to substitute that fake for the original..." Duckworth started to protest.
"You can't because you don't have access to the Bin? I know that. But Launchpad McQuack was in the Bin the other day, delivering money. And we at Hydrant got a score to settle with him. You plant this fake dime in Launchpad's plane, where Mr. McDuck is sure to find it..." Giles said.
"And even if Mr. McDuck can tell it's a fake, he'll think that Launchpad was planning to substitute it for the original!" Duckworth screamed.
"You catch on fast. We'll get even with Launchpad by getting him fired and get even with Mr. McD by making him think Launchpad planned to betray him!" Giles began.
" Since Launchpad just about the best friend he's got, that's got to hurt! What's more, he's bound to take this fake into the Bin to compare it to the Original- which is just what we want him to do!" Giles explained.
"Why? It's just a counterfeit dime." Duckworth asked.
"That's right. Just a counterfeit dime. Can't hurt nothing. Just see to it Scroogie finds it in Launchpad's plane...and that Scroogie brings the fake into the Money Bin. " Giles said.
However, Giles said that a tad too quickly, making Duckworth realize the fake dime could NOT be harmless or why would Hydrant want it brought into the Bin so badly?
So Duckworth pretended to put it in his wallet, but really took out an ordinary dime and put that dime back...and he planted the fake dime in Giles' back pants pocket.
Duckworth then wrote a note for Mr. McDuck, explaining the whole business and left it on top of Mr. McDuck's papers where Mr. McD was sure to read it. (2)
Later that day, Mr. McDuck pretended to find a fake Lucky Dime (just a normal dime Duckworth had planted there) in Launchpad's map holder. Mr. McDuck pretended to fire Launchpad.
Then Duckworth suggested that Mr. McDuck check that it was NOT the real Lucky Dime.
"Launchpad might have damaged the dime so even you can't recognize it." Duckworth said.
Mr. McDuck said that was a fine idea.
"I'll put it my bin ,then and check it out later." he said.
"I'm very pleased with you, mate. You got old Scroogie to bring that dime into the Money Bin. I'm going to talk with me bosses about cutting you in, you did such a fine job!" Giles said to Duckworth later.
"Just leave and never come back!" Duckworth said.
Giles left for Hydrant Headquarters where he made his report and stayed the night. But in the middle of night, while he was asleep in his pjs...the counterfeit Lucky Dime, still in his pants pocket (draped over a chair) exploded!(3)
An explosion that would have made a lovely hole in the Money Bin made mincemeat out of the considerably weaker Hydrant Headquarters!
Naturally, the cops came to investigate. And since Duckworth's note contained his suspicions that the fake dime was dangerous, Mr. McD reported that to Littleduck. So SHUSH was keeping it's eyes and ears open for anything out of the ordinary and this qualified. SHUSH came to investigate this, too. Between the cops and SHUSH quite a number of Hydrant Hounds were rounded up, Hydrant headquarters were revealed (and made uninhabitable by the explosion).
SHUSH was also keeping watch over the Money Bin and netted a few Hydrant Hounds who were puzzled when the explosion that was supposed to happen didn't.
Littleduck, Launchpad and Mr. McDuck all congratulated Duckworth on his fast thinking.
"Something tells me Giles isn't going to mess with you again." Launchpad said.
"I certainly HOPE not!" Duckworth replied.
The End.
(1) Rule of thumb: if an adventure is considered safe enough for the kids to tag along, I get to go too...to keep an eye on them (Mrs. Beakly is getting too old to go gallivanting around)and to take photos for the Duckburg Daily News.
(2) Duckworth did not dare talk to Mr. McDuck, Giles might be spying on him and would do Lord knows what if Duckworth "'ratted" on him.
(3) It had some kind of built-in timer. And if I DIDN'T like Ugly Twerp I might think he was selling his inventions to the bad guys, they steal them so often.
