Hotel Lez

Chapter 1: Welcome

"Hello and welcome to Hotel Lez, the award winning hotel for lesbians and bisexuals only, if you're men, get the hell outta here, if you're a hot girl, come as you please! I'm Bethany Westmoreland, this is my wife and coworker Sarah Campbell. And you
/lovely ladies are?" Westmoreland asked

"I'm Kelly Chambers. This is Nyssa al Ghul, my fiancée" Kelly said, Nyssa showing Westmoreland her engagement ring

"Pleasure to meet you. Room 77707, west wing, section 6D. Enjoy your stay" Westmoreland said, handing Kelly the room key and deeds to the room

"Thank you very much" Nyssa replied in a broad masculine voice as she and Kelly took the holovator up to their room

"NO! NO, IM NOT GOING IN THERE!" a feminine voice shrieked loudly

"oh c'mon darling, it'll be fun. You'll love it here" Anya Romanov persuaded, dragging her pleading wife Megara out of their limo and into the reception room

"oh joy. We left Russia and headed for the big city. How friggin' quaint" Megara pouted irately as Anya paid the chauffeur

"um, Room 66666, sector 5G, east wing" Campbell said, tossing Anya the room key

"well, the service is certainly great" Megara said before colliding with Helga Sinclair

"Oh! Oh, ma'am I'm so sorry, are you alright?" Helga asked, helping Megara up "yes, yes, I'm fine. I'm Meg. This is my wife Anya. You must be Helga Sinclair, former mercenary now multi-million heiress and brothel madam" Meg stated

"quite right. It is a pleasure to meet you. Welcome to Hotel Lez. Not only am I a customer, I run the place and treat guests, residents and employees with a kind, gentle and benevolent hand" Helga replied

"um, honey? The L Word marathon just started" Legate Rikke hollered

"one sec sweetie, I'm conversing with our new neighbor" Helga replied before turning to Meg and Anya

"oh! Didn't know we were expecting company. I'm Rikke, Helga's wife. I'm the assistant manager of this hotel and also the chef. Would you like to come in for a cup of tea?" Rikke asked

"ok, that'd be great" Meg said, Rikke sending her Imperial servants to bring in Anya's and Meg's luggage

"you sure about this Holli?" Kaylee asked nervously as Holli assured her comfortingly

"trust me darling, would I ever lie to you?" Holli purred

"I really don't want an answer to that question" Kaylee replied jokingly, her and Holli sharing a laugh

"oh Helga!" Holli gasped, seeing her twin sister

"hey, there you are! What kept you, I just got the tea brewing" Helga said, hugging Holli close

"oh traffic. Old Man Marvin Marsh's tractor blocked the highways" Kaylee answered

"Again? Oh good grief" Lucy Van Pelt whined, calling her husband and telling him to call off their dinner date

"so… just a quick question, how much do you serve?" Kaylee asked

"in money or blood coins?" Westmoreland responded

"uh… I meant as in customers" Kaylee specified

"Oh! Um, 3.75 trillion billion toons, games and comics" Westmoreland answered

"Yup. It's a really big number" Huntress said from behind Kaylee, accompanied by her wife Black Canary

"oh hey Aunt Helena!" Kaylee gasped

"Kaylee? Oh my gosh, sweetheart, look how big you've gotten" Huntress gasped, hugging Kaylee

"thanks. So how've you been? And congratulations on your new daughter" Kaylee said

"thanks sweetie. Things are going good. Dinah just told me she is carrying twins" Huntress replied

"OMG!" Jade gasped

"hey Jenny girl! How've you been?" Emma Frost purred

"Ohhh you know me baby, I'm green as gold!" Jade snickered

"Hey, is this Hotel Lez?" Jessica Priest asked, walking in with her lover Cameron

"it sure is, this is *the* hottest hangout place in New Toon City!" Helga exclaimed

"well, looks like we'll fit right in" Jessica said, handing the bellhop hers' and Cameron's bags

"ok we're here" Cordelia announced, as her wife Misty helped her get in since Cordelia was blind. Misty's twin sister Madison followed, her hand on her pregnant belly, followed by their cousin Kayley

"Hey Cordelia! Good to see you, how's your eyes healing?" Westmoreland asked

"Doing fair to middling, thanks" Cordelia answered

"you should go see Dr. Lara. She can cure blindness" Emma offered

"hmm… I'll think about it" Cordelia responded

"Sup" Lilith said warmly, teleporting into the front of the room with her three month pregnant wife Maya

"hey girls. How was the Opera?" Ariel asked, getting Lilith's and Maya's bags

"Fantastic. Oh and I'm so sorry about Triton's passing. You have my sympathies" Lilith said

"Aww, thanks. I really appreciate it" Ariel said

"What? King Triton… is dead?" Helga gasped

"he had cancer" Ariel said sadly

"ohhh…" everyone awed in mourning

"we are so sorry to hear that Ariel. You will be in our thoughts and prayers and we will help you get through this. I promise" Esmeralda said, hugging Ariel close

"wow. I'm really liking this place" Madison said with joy

"what can I say? All kinds of women are welcome here" Helga replied

Later that night…

"I'm Diana Prince, this is my wife Shayera. Those two are Giganta and Goliath, the second one's a transgender, please don't ask how it happened. The couple over there are Lydia and Carlotta. They got married around Christmastime. That over there is Joana
/and Piper, they're the town prostitutes and very good ones, I might add; and then you have the threesome of Dazzler, Rachel and Madelyne. They are extremely friendly and very fun to be around with; then there's Sonya, Kitana and Mileena. They're
experienced

/Mortal Kombat fighters. I will warn you, Mileena is VERY CRAZY sometimes but she can be very nice if you're nice back. Also don't look underneath her mask. Then there's Shari Shepard and Ashley Chambers. They're a real lovey-dovey couple, mind you;
/then in the upper corner you got Chelsea and Veronica Cunningham, aka the Big Boob Blonde Bimbos. Then you got Renee and Maggie, they're like Cagney and Lacey minus all the drama for your mama; up next there's Kiara and Vitani, they're lions but
were

/given the ability to speak in English by Dr. Lara, they're very cuddly and friendly but don't mention their former owner Zira unless you wanna get mauled; next there's Jenny Davis and Abigail Lowery. Jenny's a very sweet new mom of an adorable new
/baby girl Molly while Abigail's a very nice and cheerful beat cop; then you've got Miranda Wright, Scarlett, Cover Girl, Baroness and Lady Jaye, they all got married together on the same day. Up next there's Sil, Becky, Sif, Evadora, DD, Cheyenne
/and Joyce they're from TV Town and Movie Motown. They're all a really cheerful and very friendly bunch just don't get too close to Sif's swords. Up next you got the twins Goldie and Wendy. They're very much in love with each other for reasons yet
/explained and for some odd reason, Goldie has man nipples instead of breasts. Then there's Livewire and Volcana, aka Shock and Burn. They're a heavy metal tag team band, they perform daily at the bar. Up next you got Angel and Gaige and everyone
else

/I'm pretty sure you've met by now. Any questions?" Diana asked

"wow. Just… wow." Kelly said as Nyssa snored softly, her head on her arms

"I must admit your wife is quite the loud sleeper" Ms. Submission commented, walking in with her wife Blond Pinner

"oh you're the two supermodels. How's it going?" Kelly asked

"it's fabulous, sweetie, absolutely fabulous! We must get together for a shopping spree" Blond Pinner said politely

"I think my wife and I can arrange that" Kelly said

"wow. So many hot women here…" Crysta said in amazement, sitting across from her wife Thumbelina

"Crysta darling, we're married. We said we wouldn't cheat on each other" Thumbelina reminded

"Ohhh I gotta tell you Aurora, Rikke cooks up a really good lasagna" Cinderella moaned, burping

"Mm-hmm. And that molten chocolate cake was really damn good too" Aurora replied, licking her lips

"Ok ladies, closing time. Finish up your grub and shove off. We gotta cleanup for Shock and Burn later tonight" Launch barked

"oy" everyone groaned in annoyance

"ugh, I'm so stuffed I'm not sure I can even walk up to my room" Android 18 moaned

"pfft, no kidding" Cassandra Penteghast snarked

"Ooohhh Morrigan, let's go to bed. I'm feeling drowsy again…" Emilia Cousland yawned

"ok dear, tis getting rather late" Morrigan commented

"oh shit! Jigglypuff's on stage" Megara gasped, but too late as literally EVERYONE in the room was asleep

Just kidding. Not all of them

"touch me with that marker and I'll phaselock you til you're a marshmallow!" Maya snarled as the Pokemon Control Depot took Jigglypuff out and awoke everyone

"what the hell happened?" Jasmine asked, yawning

"I dunno. Some weird puffball was singing and…" Odette murmured before getting up and stretching

"oh hi! You must be Kelly and Nyssa. I'm Odette, I'm the hotel relationship counsellor. How are you liking the hotel?" Odette asked kindly

"it certainly is roomy and very well staffed. How do you do, milady?" Kelly asked

"quite well, thank you and such polite manners. I see that the late Mr and Mrs Chambers taught you well" Odette remarked

"thanks" Kelly responded before waking Nyssa up

Later…

"ok, g'night honey" Nyssa yawned, turning off her lamp and hitting the pillow, snoring as Kelly stayed awake reading James Patterson's Zoo before bed

"Kelly, are you reading that dumb Zoo book again? I warned you; you'll get nightmares! Put that thing away and go to bed" Nyssa said, Kelly obeying as she put her book in the desk and shut off her light

"That little redhead really is a sweetheart" Holli said, polishing her nails

"Who? Kelly Chambers?" Kaylee asked, getting out of the shower

"Mm-hmm. Who was that big butch girl with her?" Holli asked

"That's Nyssa al Ghul, Ra's al Ghul's daughter" Kaylee answered

"Wait… *the* Ra's al Ghul? The ecoterrorist guy?" Holli asked in shock

"Yup" Kaylee answered, bobbing her hair before climbing into bed

"What are we watching tonight?" Holli asked, snuggling next to Kaylee

"Some dumb movie called Volcano" Kaylee answered

"Nuh-uh missy, no scary movies for you before bed" Holli rejected, switching the TV over to a Cyberball game

"Helga, must you always play Angry Birds before bed?" Rikke complained

"I can't help it. Everyone needs a hobby" Helga retorted

"Oh. Well lemme know when you're done, I'm going to bed" Rikke yawned, turning off her light and going to sleep

"k, g'night sweetie" Helga said, dimming the light on her iPad as Rikke slept

"Leslie, come to bed, your hair will be fine in the morning" Volcana hollered

"alright, alright, I'm coming" Livewire moaned, getting into bed

"that's better. Now, what shall we watch tonight?" Volcana asked, applying her nightcream

"Cyberball as usual" Livewire answered, switching on the TV with the clicker

"Oof, I wouldn't go in there if I was you" Aurora exhaled, getting into bed next to Cinderella

"Hrrmmm?" Cinderella asked, waking up

"Nothing darling, never mind" Aurora answered, fluffing her pillow and laying down

"Ok, g'night" Cinderella yawned, turning off the light

"Jean, you're going to bed at 9:15, seriously?" Emma asked

"hey, don't look at me. I got an early shift tomorrow. I need my sleep" Jean yawned, snoring

"ok, g'night" Emma yawned, turning off her light

"ugh, finally I can get some rest" Cordelia yawned, turning off her light

"me too. Ok g'night guys" Madison said, turning off her light

"Night" Misty said

The next morning…

"g'morning, sleepyheads!" Inque said cheerfully as Vicki Vale and Cat Grant came into the dinner room for breakfast

"Morning" Cat said happily, pouring herself a bowl of Corn Pops

"Hey there's our favourite couple! How was your first night in the hotel?" Helga asked Kelly and Nyssa

"It was an absolute delight" Kelly answered, Nyssa yawning tiredly

"I slept like a log last night" Nyssa replied tiredly

"hey Nyssa baby, how's it going?" Sara Lance asked, walking in with her wife Felicity

"hey Ms. Sara! Congrats on the new baby!" Kelly said cheerfully

"thanks Kelly. You're such a sweetie" Sara said, kissing Kelly on both cheeks

"well I was wondering when you'd wake up" Helga said, drinking her morning coffee

"g'morning, Ms. Helga" Kelly said politely

"good morning to you as well, Ms. Chambers" Helga greeted

"May I sit here?" Kelly asked

"yes, you may do so" Helga answered

"thank you" Kelly said, sitting down as Nyssa sat next to her

"so ladies, are you enjoying your new home?" Rikke asked

"absolutely. We finally finished moving in" Nyssa replied, taking a bite of her cinnamon roll

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, it's time!" Jean gasped, having contractions

"oh my word! Jean's going to pop! Quick, someone get Dr. Lara!" Westmoreland said

"it's alright everyone, I'm here. Now c'mon Jean darling, up on the couch" Dr. Lara said calmly, placing the laboring mutant onto the velvet couch

"ok Jean, I need you to push now" Dr. Lara ordered, Jean screaming loudly in pain and pleasure as her baby's head came out of her belly. Seconds later, a beautiful baby girl was born

"aww… Emma, Emma c'mere, meet our little girl…" Jean whispered, Emma rushing over with the camera

"Ohhh Jean she's so pretty… she has Emma's hair and your eyes…" Kelly whispered

"let's call her Leliana. Leliana Grace Frost" Emma said, kissing Jean's head as Jean nodded off, holding her baby close

"well… looks like we have a new addition to the hotel" Helga said, smiling down at the new parents and child

"oh crap, I gotta go to work or else Chief is gonna wring me dry" Kelly said, getting on her cop uniform, kissing Nyssa on the cheek and hopping into her squad car with Lowery and drove off

"Kelly works with little miss Abigail? That's so nice. Abigail's such a pleasant and very well behaved young lady. She's been offered the promotion of detective several times, but she insists on remaining an officer. I think it suits her well. Also she
/addresses herself as Officer Abigail Lowery much like a certain rum-loving pirate" Rikke said

"Oh Giganta, good morning! Come on in, breakfast is served! Watch your head" Helga said delightedly, as the giant Amazon decreased her size down so she sat down and ate her meal

"Wow, you're a very big girl. Do you work out or something?" Lilith asked

"Actually yes I do. I work out at Captain Falcon's F-Fitness" Giganta answered, taking a bite of her bacon