Shine
Living in Elizabeth's shadow was not an easy thing. She was the perfect daughter. Beautiful, intelligent, courteous, flirtatious, and chaste; Elizabeth was the epitome of a Southern belle.
Boys flocked to her, mothers vied for her as their future daughter-in-law, fathers told their sons that she was the kind of girl to be brought home, teachers spoke of her schoolwork and kind nature, and the neighbors all wanted her to watch their children with the hope they could turn out as well as her.
Elizabeth always did as she was told and she never needed to be asked a second time. She was always there to help whoever was in need. She volunteered at the boys and girls club weekdays, at the soup kitchen weekly, and at the church for every bake sale, music program, Sunday school, holiday and everything in between. Elizabeth also managed to save time for her position as the student body president, cheerleading, the school's debate club, tutoring and a boyfriend, all the while maintaining her number one spot in her class. While this would have been difficult to manage for any young person, Elizabeth managed to do it all with a smile on her face and God in her heart.
Charlotte was the forgotten one, the younger, not as spectacular sister. Their parents loved each of their daughters equally, but oftentimes, because of Elizabeth's multitude of accomplishments, Charlotte was temporarily nonexistent.
Charlotte was no less beautiful than her sister, yet she often felt like a plain Jane. She was no less intelligent; she too was the top of her own class. For one reason or another, she shirked from any kind of praise, preferring silent congratulations. Charlotte was courteous; she never failed to say hello and smile to anyone who passed her and she was always prepared to lend a helping hand. She never said a bad thing to anyone, although she wasn't as perfect to never think of bad things to say. While Charlotte did have a set of admirers, there were far fewer than her elder sister's pool, and she had no idea of any of them, least of all the one that mattered.
Charlotte didn't share any of her feelings of inadequacy with anyone but her closest and longest friend, Noah. Noah was an only child, but he listened and understood Charlotte perfectly.
He was there when Elizabeth had received her first college acceptance letter, as well as the second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh, and eighth. Charlotte couldn't comprehend why it was such a surprise she got into all the colleges she applied to when her grades were phenomenal and she was Mother Teresa in the making.
He was there when, instead of seeing their younger daughter as the lead in the school play, her parents went with Elizabeth to visit her top three choices. "They had all year to visit these schools, because regardless, Elizabeth would have to take time out from her busy life. But they had to pick the weekend of my play."
He was there when Charlotte's parents chose to go to Elizabeth's impromptu senior awards dinner rather than Charlotte's vocal concert, where she was the only sophomore with a solo. They had known about the concert months before and the awards dinner only a week.
He was there when Elizabeth graduated from high school. Her valedictorian speech was wonderful and cliché, and despite this, the whole graduation crowd applauded enormously for her. He remembered hearing Charlotte murmur under her breath that this speech was no different than any other graduation speech on the planet.
Noah was there throughout, always with an ear to listen and a hand to hold. While he knew that Charlotte was constantly jealous of the attention Elizabeth got, Charlotte merely wanted to be noticed by her parents and chosen over Elizabeth at least once.
But that time never seemed to come.
The years wore on and Charlotte grew more bitter. Time and again, Elizabeth was chosen over her, even when Elizabeth chose to attend college a state away, in Georgia. Elizabeth made Dean's list and received a David Yurman necklace; Charlotte, of the six hundred students who had auditioned, made the all-state chorus and her parents couldn't even manage to drive an hour to the free concert. Elizabeth joined in the international cultures club on campus and deserved a dinner; Charlotte organized her entire junior prom almost single-handedly and had to pay for her own prom dress.
Charlotte knew her parents loved her. She knew they truly did. They told her all the time and while they rarely came to her big events, they tried desperately to attend the majority of the smaller ones. She just always felt overshadowed by her older sister who seemed to be able to do no wrong.
Then, the worst thing that could possibly happen did. Towards the end of her sophomore year in college, Elizabeth became pregnant. Perfect Elizabeth was suddenly not so perfect. The father, thankfully – according to their mother, was Elizabeth's boyfriend, Caleb, a soon to be graduating senior. Both sets of parents insisted marriage was the answer and a speedy wedding was planned.
Charlotte never felt worse about being jealous of her prefect sister than she did the moment Elizabeth had come home from college, her head hung in shame and no smile in sight.
It took some encouraging on Noah's part, but Charlotte eventually plucked up the courage to face her sister and tell her how she felt.
Knocking on Elizabeth's bedroom door, Charlotte asked, May I come in?"
A faint "yes" travelled through the door and Charlotte tenderly opened it.
Elizabeth was sitting on top of her bed, Indian-style.
"Oh, hey Charlie."
Charlotte was surprised to hear her childhood nickname. It had been a very long time since she had.
"Hey, Bith."
Hanging back by the door, Charlotte hadn't really thought far enough to plan what she was going to say once Elizabeth had let her into the room.
"Come sit by me," Elizabeth told her, patting the empty bed to her left.
Quietly, Charlotte made her way over and sat beside her sister.
"So, what did you come by to talk about, Charlie?"
Tucking her legs under her, Charlotte cleared her throat nervously and didn't answer so Elizabeth began.
"If it helps any, I'll start: I tried too hard. I tried too hard to be the perfect daughter, the perfect student, the perfect citizen, but along the way I forgot to be the perfect sister. And by perfect, I don't mean, 'do everything right' sister. I mean being there for you when you needed me, not monopolizing our parents' time with my irrelevant and unnecessary awards ceremonies or small miracles." Elizabeth began to laugh. It was a strange laugh, almost cynical, but at the same time, it sounded relieved.
"It's funny. I've always wanted to have that one moment where I could just break the rules. You know? I never lied. I never cheated. I never partied in high school. I hung around the popular crowd, but only to keep appearances. I wasn't a part of them. I was their statue, their figurehead. I made them look good, and I was okay with that then. But the moment I stood on that podium for graduation, I realized I knew nothing. I knew no one. I hadn't lived. I hadn't taken risks. So as I read that horribly cliché speech, I promised myself that I would take risks and make mistakes and stop trying to be so perfect.
"And then I went to school. I met Caleb within the first couple weeks. We were friends first, but then one night at a party, I had the impulse to kiss him. So I did. And that started our romance. He's handsome and daring, funny and clever. He makes me happy and makes me smile. Almost from the first kiss, I got tingles. Those fairytale tingles. I knew once we were three months into our relationship that I loved him. It took him a bit longer, but he loves me too.
"Honestly, this baby will be the best possible thing for me. I may not complete school when I expected to, but I'll go back. I'll make sure my son or daughter knows that he or she is loved tremendously. This baby is my second, and possibly the best mistake, I will ever make. Because it helped me realize that I am not the best sister. That was my first mistake.
"I failed at being your sister. But I want to fix it. I don't know how you didn't hate me, always stealing your glory. My ceremonies and trips and performances always seemed to come before yours, even when you had the lead in the play, or when you were the only sophomore to have a solo in your vocal concert, or to get into the outrageously difficult to get into all-state chorus, or even now, as your class's valedictorian. People know you. People talk about you as a person, not as your accomplishments. Charlie, you are going to do wonderful things because you took legitimate risks and didn't wait for other people to acknowledge how brilliant you are.
"I know Noah has been there for you throughout it all. I can't say I had anyone like him until I met Caleb. I think that Noah will always be there for you."
Charlotte hadn't even realized she was crying until Elizabeth wiped the tears from her face.
"You, Charlotte, are going to shine."
After such a speech, Charlotte could hardly process what she was going to tell her sister. All the anger and jealousy had dissipated as she realized her perfect sister was not as perfect as she had always seemed. She was human and bound to have flaws. She acknowledged these and made to set them right.
"I love you Elizabeth, and while I know you don't think of yourself as the best sister, your little speech right there proved just the opposite. You are the best sister. And I am incredibly lucky that you are my sister."
Charlotte gave her sister a hug before getting up, practically jumping at the chance to talk to her best friend.
Before Charlotte sprinted away, Elizabeth had to ask where she was headed.
"I need to talk to Noah."
The sentence left a smile on Elizabeth's face. At least the smile was back.
Charlotte arrived on Noah's front door in record timing, but she was tired and slightly out of breath. Running in the May heat wave was difficult.
She knocked on the door, bruising her knuckles in the process.
Noah opened the door and was shocked to see Charlotte.
"Charlotte!" he exclaimed. His manners quickly returned and he invited her in.
She just stood on the steps and asked him, "Why were you always there for me when Elizabeth was getting special attention from my parents?"
"Is this a trick question? I was there to support you, of course. You're my best friend."
"Just my best friend? Because in a matter of weeks, we'll be going off to different colleges in different states. I'll be going to North Carolina, and you'll be in Mississippi. I hope regardless we'd be able to still be friends, but something Elizabeth just told me finally clicked. I'm your Elizabeth and you're my Caleb."
"I'm sorry? I didn't follow any of that. And can you please come inside? This heat wave is getting a bit too hot to stand outside."
Charlotte rushed in, and stood in the foyer. Her heart pounded, and not just from her run or the heat.
"You've always been here for me, if I ever needed someone to talk to or just someone to listen. We do everything together. You know all my secrets and I know yours. I think I am in love with you."
She said it. She did it. Charlotte was taking the risks she had always taken, the ones Elizabeth had always been jealous of. She was no longer stuck behind her older sister's shadow, the shadow she envisioned. She was coming fully into the light and she was going to shine.
Looking hopeful at his face, Charlotte saw his mouth curve into a smile as he took a step towards her. He kissed her and there were tingles.
Living out loud was an easy thing for Charlotte. It came as naturally as breathing. She was someone to look to as a role model. She looked to please no one but herself and she strove to be one but herself. Beautiful, intelligent, independent and in love, Charlotte was an individual who shone like the brightest star.
AN: Woah! Flashback! I came upon this randomly as I was looking through old college documents. This was a creative piece I wrote for my Southern Writers course sophomore year. The part in quotes was written by me (and slightly edited for better clarification).
"Within this story, I hoped to emulate a little bit of Elizabeth Spencer. I can't remember the title of the work, but because of the way Spencer describes her character Jessie and Jessie's failings to live up to her mother's expectations, I thought I would translate this into living in an older sister's shadow. Although I am the older sister, I know that my younger sister sometimes feels the burden of being in my shadow, although she academically has done better than me and has always been a part of the popular crowd. The teachers she has/had, I've had. This is my attempt to write the overshadowed sister, and show that someone thinks she outshines her sister."
