Author: Hey. Sorry but I've been working on multiple stories at once and I don't know why. Either way, here is a one-part taking place after "Reformed." The inspiration for this was when Garnet mentioned Pearl and Amethyst got really hostile at it. Keep that in mind.
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It was nighttime with a bright moon. Amethyst was sitting on the porch, in a folding chair, just staring into nothing. Occasionally she turned her head to glance at the sky, then to her left, then to the waters of the ocean. Her view was focused to nothing and it seemed that any movement was just pure instinct. I wondered what she was thinking of.
I had came here to talk to her, about our relationship. Even though we love each other, we've seemed to have grown very far apart in the last year. To emphasize this point, I heard and seen earlier today how uneasy it was for her to hear Garnet talk about. The first was when Garnet told me herself, the next time is when I captured the 'Slinker.' Amethyst hides it well, but I can tell that she feels challenged whenever I'm around. And I want to know why.
I approach the screen door. But just before I go outside I stop and I hesitate. My mind has been made up and it has been all day, so why am I stopping? I guess it's just that I've never been good with expressing emotion. Either with Rose, Steven, Garnet, or now with Amethyst, it just seems like I can't find a way to say what I want to say. But before I could take another thought, I push the door wide open.
Amethyst looked back at me. Her wide eyes calmed back down after realizing that it was just me.
"Oh, hey Pearl," she said. Her voice was fairly expressionless, although she seemed very content. "Are you okay? You look kinda weird."
I hadn't realized my facial expression. Eyebrows slightly furrowed, eyes never looking straight, lip slanted down to one side. But I ignore it and continue.
"Yeah, I am. Hey, Amethyst, can I, umm, talk to you?" My hand mindlessly went up to rub my shoulder.
"Sure?" Amethyst replied, patting down a chair next to her. "But you better tell me what's up, I hate seeing you so worked up."
I go and sit in the chair questioning something. She is always caring for me, deep down, and I feel the same for her. But why in the world do we get in conflict so much? Well, that's why I came out here. So I just jumped straight at it, 'not beating around the bush' humans say,
"Amethyst." I start. Her stare at me makes me pause for a second. "Every time we're together, or even if I'm mentioned in any way, why do you get so...defensive?"
She keeps her look at me, almost frozen, as she contemplates what I just asked. Then looked at the floor as she considered an answer.
"I don't what you're talking about," was her response. Her voice had dropped low when she had said it. We both knew that it was no where near the truth. So I pressed a little more.
"It's obvious that you're bothered by me for some reason. I just want to know." Her stance didn't change. A thought went into my head, something I hadn't thought of before. And it was probably true. "Did I do something to you?"
At this Amethyst twitched and, soon after, took a long sigh. "No, P. Of course it's not you. You're great...Amazing..." Her lack of detail annoyed me. I anxiously waited for her to say something more, but was only replied with silence.
"Then what is it!?" I blurted out, sounding louder than I wanted to. I compose myself and continue in a more assertive voice. "I mean, if it's not me, and you've hadn't done anything wrong...then why do you seem so annoyed of me?"
Time went down to a halt and all I could hear was the ocean waves, rolling loudly on the shore. Amethyst started to twist her hair with a finger.
Her voice cut through the silence that rose between us. "Pearl. Have you ever tried to do something, but didn't accomplish what you wanted to?" The question sounded sincere, although there was an obvious meaning behind it. But not of anger.
"I don't understand. How will thi-"
"Just answer, please," she interrupted. It wasn't rudely but to prove a point.
I sighed and gave my best shot. "Well, of course I have. Many times in my long past. But not as present as the last dozen decades. And the times I have failed, I accomplish after retrying." Was this good enough?
"Exactly." Her gaze went back to the water. "You're perfect. And you've always been my practical sister. Although that's not always good. Hell, I've seen sisters all over and their relationship is just like ours. They fight, hate, make up, stand for each other when needed, kiss, I think-" she paused at the last one, but not because she reconsidered saying, but because she wanted to think of what she want to say next. "And always compared to each other," she finished.
It took me a little to figure it out, but the wind seem to pick up as I felt myself grow colder, understanding what she meant. And it was then, I had first started to realize why she felt uncomfortable talking about me. Not complete understanding, but an eye-opening start. Did she really think she was being constantly compared to me? Why would she feel like-? How long has-? Was it because Garnet and I-? But-?
Every question didn't finish. I didn't know to finish it. I didn't know how to answer either.
"Amethyst," I gasped out, "Please don't tell me that you think that I'm...better than you." The last words spat out like a croak, they were a poison that I wanted to keep in rather than out.
She put her elbows on her knees and threw her head into her hands. "Of course you are. Everyone knows so. Garnet keeps wanting me to be more like you. And that's what I've been trying to do." Her eyes closed but I could still see the shine of water in them that she tried to hide. And through a squealing voice, she said, "Most of my time is spent trying to be more like you. Strong, dedicated, focused..." her teary eyes gleamed up at me. She murmured, "Beautiful, smart..." and trailed off.
She somehow found a way to compliment me, even during her internal war if conflicting emotions. Through her tears, throughout her daily life, she idolized me in a way that she, and even I, hated. I wouldn't ever want to be anyone's idol, not even Steven's. I felt like that was too much of an honor for me, despite it not being my choice.
And Garnet, as foreseeing as she was, didn't realize, or at the very least expect, for Amethyst to take her comments in such a way.
But I needed to tell her that it wasn't true. "Garnet never meant it like that. She just wanted you to become better everyday," I say. "She would never mean it like this," I repeated. The word seemed like it calmed her down. Her sobs went to sniffles and the tears stopped flowing, but the river had left streams of water down her cheeks, lit brightly by the moon.
When she seemed to regain reason she spoke again, much smoother now. "I know that, I have always knew so. But I've almost always had a sense that you were my better." She used a word choice I had only seen her use when she couldn't think too well. "Her saying so only made me think about it more."
Her saying this only angered me. I've been this blind for how long? "Well, I don't think I'm better than you," I respond. This finally reached her. She gave me a look with that came with a silent 'Do you really mean it?' I continue, "We all have our faults. You just show your's more than I do..."
'I didn't mean it like that!'
Realizing the mistake, I added, "Which isn't bad, don't get me wrong, it takes strength to be willing to show such a thing as your weaknesses." And this was said with a truth, and Amethyst knew when I was lying.
Through acknowledgement, Amethyst gave a half smile. "Thanks." All I could do was smile back. "You always know how to make me think straight."
During another period of silence, which would last until the next day, Amethyst wiped her tears and suddenly threw her arms around me and pulled me into a tight embrace. I gave it back.
And while we were in each other's arms, I had answered another question: How on this planet, did I ever, ever, fall in love with such an emotionally unstable...uncomprehendable... unrelatable...uncontrollable...unable-to-pay-attention...and defective...Amethyst of a gem?
The answer was that, like these traits, she was just like me, while also being nothing like me. Because of this, we could always comfort each other, we would always never need each other in our lives, but also always need each other to be complete.
End
OMG this pulled at my heartstrings just typing it. Tell me how you think. The next thing I'm publishing is a (poorly written, sorta) song about how Pearl felt about where she came from, how she responded to Rose telling her that she didn't need to fight for her, and that Pearl is in love in Rose but can't say. That will be set during the revolution right before The Great Gem Battle that took place on Earth.
Any thoughts on this story or the next?
