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A/N: My second very own fanfiction. Dunno if it's any good but I've tried to make the best of it. ENJOY!!

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Rating: this chappie T but the fic is gonna be M

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Declaimer: I do not own Bleach or the characters out of this fanfiction…Wish I did, both anime and manga would turn into M in the first episode. I do not gain any profit by writing this it's all for fun.

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Run….

It always starts with that…

Running…

Why?

Why do we run?

It's easy. We run to hide, everyone does. It doesn't matter if you're an afro-American, Gothic, Satanist, Christian, Muslim or Wicca. You hide from everything, from life or death. From your responsibilities. Some run from their work others run from there homes. There is always a reason to run or hide. It's human nature and it has nothing to do with believe, religion or where you come from. Some run to hide from death but forget to live while running. Some seek death as they run from life but only find pain and despair. Some have to run from home to safe themselves from for example beating parents, husbands or just the home situation. They run and hide in there work and it takes a while before they realize this and actually really leave and not just hide. Others run from there work because it's to stress full and it's slowly killing them.

'We run because we're human.'

Ichigo saved the document on his computer and rubbed his eyes. "Damm school…" He checked his clock, 1 a.m. He sighed. "Why should I even try to sleep…?"

His frown deepened as he thought back to the last few nights. He couldn't sleep, he just couldn't. The sleep would not come and get him. He was stuck with images. Images of something, no someone... "We run because we're human…But what if you're not a human?" Ichigo sighed again and ran a hand through his short, spiky orange hair. He regretted that now since his hair stood in really strange angles…It wasn't like he could control his hair it was just so…uncontrollable!

Ichigo knew he wouldn't sleep again tonight errr morning…He pulled on his shoes and fixed his school uniform…He hadn't pulled it off since he came home. The one think he forgot was to shut down his computer with the document still visible on it…

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A read haired Shinigami knocked on a window….No answer…He knocked again this time calling a name as well. "Yo! Berry Head!" He pushed the window as there wasn't a reply again…'click' The window opened and the tall Shinigami entered the room, hopping over Kurosaki Ichigo's bed and landing in the middle of the room.

The first thing he noticed that said Berry Head wasn't there. "If yer gonna attack me from behind I'll kick yer ass…" Renji growled…but now answer again…until he heard a sound that sounded a lot like some THING trying to get out of some THING…

"Hey Renji." Renji turned a quarter and saw…Kon, climbing out from underneath the bed. One of his eyes popping almost out of his face and a piece of fabric…PINK…hanging from his right frond paw. "Did Quincy get ya again?" Renji asked grinning. "Shut up, Shinigami! I was going to help you but whatever…" The mod soul said. "Help me how are ya gonna help me?" He asked. "I ain't gonna help you." Renji stalked closer catching the struggling toy's neck and squeezed his fingers firmly around it. "The computer! The computer!" The lion peeped and Renji let him go. Kon hid in a corner of the room. Ishida had already molested his beautiful self. How could he ever face Rukia Onee-San again?!

Renji went over to the computer and plopped down on the chair. It was rather comfy. He looked at the scream. "Run…" He read out loud. "We hide because we're human."

He read the document…something's not right…It's like it's not finished…Where is the good part? Running can be good. It appealed Renji more times than he could count. He clicked away the document and another document was waiting for him to be read…Well that was how Renji thought it was.

What is happening?

The fear…

Why do I fear?

Renji raised an eyebrow...What was this? And what was it doing on Ichigo's computer!? He read further:

My life when from normal...killing hollows, dodging attacks from my dad to a hole lot different. My life changed. HE changed my life so suddenly I wasn't prepared for it. Never though it would happen to me.

Alright I KNOW I don't like girls. They've got boobs...and there soft. A guy can be soft as well but there rough also. A girl is to gentle and girlish, I think a guy can be that as well but there not like that all the time and then it's good. I like muscle, not to much of course but muscles are good. Females don't look good with muscles...They don't look good at all. They bitch about there hair, there weight and there nails for Christ Sakes! I finally know now that I'm gay. There I said it I'm a fagot.

And the funniest cough most horrible thing is that that fucking MOD SOUL had to inform me of it. Yeah sure I could have know when I woke up from that wet dream...Containing HIM and a shower. That hair...I won't start with describing it since I'd end up raping the guy!!

Ow yeah, I started with the fear. Why do I fear? It's simple, I'm in love with a guy, a Shinigami...I don't think I fear the change he doesn't like me, or ain't gay at all. The fear is that he won't just because I'm still alive. It would be so complicated. His rank...He wouldn't be able to just leave Soul Society and come here. Sure he has holidays but it's complicated. What I fear most is that even if we love each other...we won't be together. Also I fear that he would do something stupid to save me, not that I need protection, or leave Soul Society. They need him but I need him as well!

Ichigo.

Renji looked away after finishing the diary like entry from Ichigo. "Kon...?" He growled. "H-Hai." Was the little peep from the mod soul. "What is this?!" Kon grinned, as far as lion plushy can grin. "It's Ichigo's diary. He hates to write with a pencil so he does it on the computer. It was hidden at the back of the first one. An unfinished school thing. He saved this one but forgot to turn off his computer. That's why they were both open He left 15 minutes before you came in."

" I'll get ya some porn Kon. You've been a good boy." Renji looked as if he was thinking as he left Ichigo's room

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Ichigo had found an empty shop and an empty house. The only option left was that all the person's living at Urahara's, he bit his lower lip forcing his train of thought away he did NOT want a hard on right now. Were was I ah yes his only option was that they were in the huge training basement below the shop. He climbed down the stairs before he used his Substitute Shinigami license to get out of his body and let out his soul. To say it softly his mood was bad. Every thought let back to HIM. Ichigo couldn't help it. He had a serious crush on the guy and he thought that it might be love or could turn into love. The only way to let out his tension was to masturbate, but he preferred to do that in his shower and NOT in a rocky basement were everybody could find him. He would either kill himself or die from embarrassment.

Creating a few huge gasps in the ground and splitting some big boulders of rocks with Getsuga Tenshou Ichigo collapsed. He hadn't been able to sleep, his mind was busy all the time. It was thinking and Ichigo couldn't take it much longer. His longing for HIM grew again and he couldn't stop himself.

His wet dream returned to him, HIS naked body, the long red hair that almost looked like blood running down that strong back. The tribal tattoo's that were all over his body. In his dream the tattoo's were on his upper legs as well and the once on his abdomen ran down low, VERY low.

Ichigo found himself wondering if that was true, if the tattoo's really were like that. But back to the not sleeping part. His dreams were haunted by a red-haired Shinigami. When he was awake, Ichigo could only think about him and when he was asleep it wasn't much better. Ichigo just hoped it would all work out and that is hormone driven body would stop being so, so…hormone driven!! He got back up to his feet, fastening Zangetsu on his back he began to sort of long road back to the stairs which would lead him back into the house of Urahara Kisuke.

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It was not hard to find out where Ichigo was going and Renji had it figured out pretty fast. It was logics and of course the art of tracking and reading reiatsu. Ichigo's amount of reiatsu was huge and he was not able to control it, making it extremely easy for others to find him. It was good he was strong as well since hollows were drawn to him like moths to a flame.

But back to the point, Renji was using shumpo to get to Urahara Shoten and jumped down the ladder quickly so he was standing in the basement.

"Yo! Berry head!" He screamed and he heard an annoyed growl coming from his back. "Shut up, you over grown pineapple!"

When Renji turned to face the other he was greeted with a swing of a sword aimed for his head. Renji grinned as he made a back flip and easily dodge the blow. In the air he unsheathed his sword and released it to its Shikai state. "That's a warm welcome, Ichigo." He said, still grinning since he knew it pissed the other off greatly.

Ichigo was not in the mood for a vocal fight. His mind was already in the gutter and seeing the object of his fantasies and dreams just as he was fighting to get his head OUT of those thoughts did not help.

All he could do to let out the tension was to directly attack the other. He frowned, damm him and his short temper.

Ichigo's hits were powerful and it was obvious that he was mad, that something was bothering him. Renji was actually having trouble blocking them. He moved Zabimaru so that Zangetsu was caught between two sharp spikes, twisted the blade a bit to the left before moving it up with much force and speed. Zabimaru did not let go of the others Zampaktou and Ichigo was forced to let Zangetsu go. Renji twisted his wrist back normal and the spikes released Zangetsu to have it flying through the air and land behind Renji.

Ichigo growled angrily. "You little fuck!" He shumpoed to Zangetsu and had it lifted just in time to block Renji's sword. Renji moved out of the way and separated the segments of Zabimaru, letting it extend so he could try and pull Ichigo's legs from underneath him. Unlucky for Renji Ichigo dodged and fired of Getsuga Tenshou. Renji dodge but was angry, VERY angry. "That was with the intent to fucking kill!" He cried out. "What the HELL is wrong with ya!"

Ichigo dashed forward and before Renji could react he had his lips pressed against the others with bruising force. Renji's eyes were wide and the strong hand on his jaw prevented his head from turning away. He gasped and Ichigo used that to enter Renji's sweet mouth with his tongue. Renji just stood there, hearth beating fast and breath coming faster.

Ichigo pulled away, his cheeks a bit flushed. His eyes stood afraid, what was the other reaction going to be? The hand on Renji's strong jaw fell away and before Renji could even blink or collect his thoughts Ichigo ran and shumpoed away from him, gripping his body with him. Ichigo moved into his body when he was upstairs and then proceeded to run towards his house.

Renji was still stunned, Zabimaru slid from his hand and all he could thing was why did he not push the other away?

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SO what do ya think!? I kinda liked it. Anyway rate and review I love to hear what ya think of it!

Lot's of kisses and hugs

Midnight.