Title: Coming Back
Author: Caera1996
Pairing: Kirk/McCoy
Rating: NC-17
WordCount: 1,063
Summary: Written for LJ's Space_Wrapped: Sequel to "What It Takes To Come Back", (which can also be found on this site by visiting my profile) though it is not necessary to read that first. Jim is recovering from being held captive. Physically he's okay, but he's struggling with the after effects, and Leonard does what he can to help. They take a leave from the Enterprise, and spend some time over Christmas together.
Beta: None
ContentAdvisory: None
Disclaimer:Not mine
Leonard turned over in bed, and realized he was alone. The other side was empty and cold. Pushing himself up on one elbow, he squinted as he looked around the darkened room, shivering slightly as the cold air swirled around him. There, standing by the window, staring out over the night, was Jim.
Leonard slipped out of bed and crossed the room to him. Jim didn't react or turn at his approach, but Leonard was sure Jim knew he was there. He had his arms wrapped tightly around his body, as if trying to ward off a chill. And though it was chilly in the cabin on this early Christmas Day in the mountains and forest of Colorado, Jim wasn't very susceptible to physical cold. No…this chill came from within.
He ran his hands up Jim's arms, gently holding him at the shoulders. Jim allowed a slight shift of his weight to bring his back against Leonard's front. No hesitation, no doubt…just complete surety that Leonard would be there to hold him up. And he was. He always was. It'd taken a while for each of them to know…to trust…that would always be. But they were there now. They knew, and they used that, leaning on each other when they there was no more strength to do it alone.
Jim inhaled and turned his head. Leonard pressed a kiss to his temple and wrapped his arms around Jim's torso. He loved the feel of Jim's body. The strength, the life, he felt when he held him like this. It made it easier to put the other times out of his mind. Those times when Jim came back hurt, less than whole, and Leonard has to leave "husband" behind in order to be "doctor".
This time, Jim had come back less than whole, but physically unharmed. And this time, Leonard knew there was nothing the doctor could do. This time, Jim needed his husband. So, they'd taken a leave…leaving the Enterprise, space, exploration, adventure – leaving everything that Jim normally loved...to give him time to come back, to heal, to lean on Leonard, and for Leonard to provide the support that he needed.
And during their time on leave, they drifted through December, not really paying attention to the days, until today. Today was Christmas. That hadn't meant a whole lot to Leonard before. And he supposed, that in and of itself, it still doesn't.
But this Christmas as a little different. This Christmas, for the first time, he'd stopped looking at things from the perspective of what he had to lose, and instead, saw what he had.
And Jim, he thought Jim had turned that corner too. Maybe that was what he was thinking of as he stood at the window, in the middle of the night, looking into the deep, dark, cold.
Jim turned in Leonard's arms, and they held each other tightly, fitting together perfectly, Jim's head on his shoulder. After a couple of moments, Jim lifted his head and looked into Leonard's eyes, his lips curling into a small smile, the depth of blue still hiding so much.
"I'm okay," Jim said, answering the very question Leonard wanted to ask, but managed to keep quiet. Jim brushed their lips together, one hand coming up to run through Leonard's sleep mussed hair. Leonard responded to Jim's touch, and deepened the kiss, eyes fluttering closed as their tongues touched and stroked…each reveling in the essence of the other.
Jim's hands skated down Leonard's back, settling on his hips, pulling him tighter to his body. He made a little noise deep in his throat and pulled away, ending the kiss with quickened breath and aroused senses. Leonard looked into his eyes, his own heart racing in his chest. Jim's gaze was full of love and desire, and Leonard kissed Jim again, and moved them back to bed, his hands sliding under the shirt Jim wore, pushing it up his body. Jim raised his arms and Leonard pulled the shirt off, then made quick work of his own.
They settled down in bed together, in an embrace that brought them skin to skin. Soft lips sought out sensitive places and hands freely roamed. Under the cover of the blankets, Jim caught Leonard's boxers and pulled them down. He arched his hips enough to let him, and then worked them down and off, losing them somewhere in the blankets. Leonard slid a hand into Jim's, reaching around and squeezing firmly. Jim gasped and bucked at the feel of his strong hand kneading his flesh. Jim brought his legs up, making it easy for Leonard to remove that last piece of clothing, and then they were together, the glorious feeling of flesh against flesh making them both groan.
Leonard moved so that he hovered over Jim, holding himself up on knees and hands, staring down into his eyes. Jim gently stroked his back, squeezed his shoulders, ran his fingers through his hair…mapping every bit of him with his eyes and hands. He'd almost forgotten – found it almost impossible to remember – there in the roaring, unrelenting black – how Bones felt, sounded, looked, tasted. And when he realized he was forgetting, he lost his anchor. And there, alone, unconnected, he'd almost lost himself.
And Bones must've understood some of what was churning in his eyes, because his gaze became earnest.
"I'm right here, Jim. You always have me."
Jim nodded. "I know," he whispered.
Leonard lowered himself to Jim, kissing him again, and moaning into Jim's mouth at the feel of him arching underneath him. Jim gasped and thrust up as they moved together, rocked together, giving themselves over to the sensations and coursing through their bodies, carrying them closer and closer to the peak.
Jim clutched Leonard to him as he breathed harshly, his muscles tensing as wave after wave of intense pleasure crashed over him. Leonard followed, squeezing his eyes closed, clenching his hands on Jim's tightly, and then slowly relaxing as he caught his breath.
Later, lying together, bodies warm and relaxed from the earlier exertion, they drifted in and out of sleep as the sun started to illuminate the cold morning. And Leonard felt a rush of gratitude for everything he had, for what they had together, for all the times Jim came back, no matter what.
"Merry Christmas, Bones," Jim murmured.
"Merry Christmas, Darlin'."
