(warning this story has gore,swearing,brief nude scene,and stuff so no 9 year olds!)

In the little town of South Park Stan and Kyle were playing some Call of Duty at Cartman's house "god damn it Kyle!" yelled Cartman "dude get over it"

said Kyle "ah fuck you Kyle you jew burger" said Cartman. While they were playing the Hanes family moved in a new house 2 after Eric's house while the

family was packing there son Nick was on his phone "well thank you very much Tom" said Nick's dad "its nice to meet you Frank" said the moving guy

"Nick how do you like your new town" said Nick's mom "oh okay whatever" said Nick "Nick give me that Iphone" said his mom "what" "give me it "

"why!?" "cause you don't need it i heard that phones give kids cancer " "but mom" "give me it now!" "okay then you cock sucking whore" Nick then

gave her the phone "now go on and play" said his mom "okay i'am going" said Nick and as he was walking he flipped his mom off."dude iam winning"

said Stan "no iam winning" said Kyle "Kyle your a jew you cant play Ghosts" said Cartman "shut up fatass!" "jew!" "fat boy!" "kike!" "what did you say

asshole" "i said your a mother fucking kike!" yelled Cartman "boys you should go play outside" said Cartman's mother "why?" said Stan "cause theres a

new kid" said Liane "who? said Kyle "Nick Hanes" said Liane "what?" said Cartman "Nick Hanes sweetie" "no no! fuck no!" said ran to his

room crying "whats wrong with him?" said Stan "yeah" said Kyle "I dont know you should go now i think something is going wrong with Eric right now"

said Liane "okay Mrs Cartman" said both got up and unhooked there Xbox and left "dude whats wrong with Cartman?" said Kyle "i dont

know" said Kyle they were both walking to Stan's house when they saw Nick "hey are you the new kid" said Stan "yeah who the fuck are you" said

Nick "iam Stan this is Kyle" said Stan "oh okay" said Nick "you want to hang with us we could show you around" said Kyle "alright" said Nick "cool" said

Stan the four went around town showing every house and the finally got to Douche Bags house Kyle knocks on the door "Hello?" said

Douche Bags's mom "hello can we talk to Douche Bag please?" said Stan "oh okay he's in his room playing Godzilla with his friend Butters" said Douche

Bag's mom "bitch you got some nice tittys there them nipples look nice and creamy can you let me motor boat them please?" said Nick Stan,Kyle,and Do-

uche Bag's mom stood there in shock "nah i'am just fucking with you" said Nick the 3 went to DB'S room they opened the door and they see Butters

dressed in a Godzilla suit and DB building a little city on his floor "hey Butters,hey Douche Bag" said Stan "hey fellas whos the new kid?" said Butters

"this is Nick" said Kyle "nice to meet you Nick" said Butters DB just stood there still building the city "whos the quiet one here is he a retard or what?

said Nick "no he's Douche Bag" said just stood there and then just started laughing, he laughed and laughed still he started crying "oh my god

this so fucking funny!" said Nick "hello cunt nugget!" he was still laughing when Douche Bag went over to him and farted on his force was so

strong that Nick flew back and fell out the window holding on the ledge "holy shit Douche Bag what did Cartman tell you never fart on anyone's balls!"

yelled Stan "OH HAMBURGERS!" yelled Butters he ran out of the room screaming "guys help me!" said then went over and helped him up "dude

your a fucking asshole" said Nick DB just stood there "you know what fuck you guys iam going home" "but-" "nope fuck all of you guys iam going home"

he left after the agruement "dude this is pretty fucked up here" said Stan

Chapter one: Nick

Chapter two coming soon