((Just so you know:

Regular = Me/human/story
Bold = Discord's interruptions
Italics = Author's notes
((Italics in double-brackets)) = Out of character me, as in Isabella Auditore.

Enjoy, and I hope you don't take this idea too seriously!))


A/N: So this story is basically a cute day out featuring one of my OTPs, Fluttercord! He gets a little OOC, cause he's in luuurrrvv, so please don't yell at me.


A Harmonious Day

Discord, Spirit of Chaos, Lord of Disharmony, King of the Unpredictable, was currently laying on his stomach, enjoying the pleasant warmth of Celestia's sun, gazing at the small, yellow figure of Fluttershy as she finished off her salad. She had no idea the draconequus was watching her at first. Not until she opened her eyes, at least. Once the shy pegasus spotted Discord, she paused and tilted her head to the side. The sight of it would've melted the iciest of hearts.
"I'm sorry, but is something wrong?" Fluttershy asked softly, just as a gentle breeze lifted at strands of her mane. Discord sighed.
"No, nothing's wrong, my dear." He smiled dreamily. Then, as if he suddenly remembered who he was and what he was doing, he shook his head and cleared his throat awkwardly, the stupidly happy smile gone.
Fluttershy blinked, but smiled nonetheless and then continued to nibble at a lettuce leaf.
"I'm glad you're enjoying yourself, Discord. You seemed sad recently." The yellow pegasus commented, a concerned expression filling her eyes.
Discord, slightly taken aback-

No, stop. Stop right now.

...slightly taken aback, went to ask Fluttershy what she meant. Of course, Discord had been feeling pretty awful lately, especially after his-

I said stop, so naturally I assumed you would stop. Of course you could be trusted, I thought. Humans love that whole 'honesty' thing. Ehh, or something like it. Honour? Maybe. Who cares? Not me. Therefore, no one should care! Anyway, my point is, I expect you to obey me when I speak.

Ehh... especially after his, well. After the events of late involving Tirek. Even if his friends had forgiven him-

Okay, let me get something clear. I asked you to obey me. So, in plain, easy-to-understand words, please explain what part of 'obey me' you didn't understand. Are humans really as stupid as I was led to believe? Or are you just an exception?

Umm... Okay, I'll humor you. I guess whatever you are - some sort of virus, or whatever - can read what I'm writing. Unless you can just sense it, but let's be realistic here.

Oh good! I'm being acknowledged at last! Well, at the very least, you've stopped writing that Celestia-awful story. Anyway, now that I have your attention-

Whoa, not so fast! First, what are you, and how can you understand this? Secondly, it wasn't that bad, was it?

Oh, sweetie...

Hey, don't you 'Oh sweetie' me! I don't know who you are, so I want to know before you start demanding things.

Okay, so somepony's a little grumpy. Oh wait, humans don't use 'somepony', do they? Ugh. So somebody's a little grumpy.

Did you just refer to me as a human? And use the term 'somepony'? Are you a pony or something?

Didn't you just ask for your questions to be answered? Ahh, it's your own fault. And no, I'm or something.

No. No way. You're not- are you? No! No way!

'No, no way! You can't be him! Waah!' Did you hear that? That's what you sound like right now. And yes, I am me. The Lord of Chaos. Discord, if you wish. And I do not go on picnics with Fluttershy!

That was awfully defensive of you. Also, I never mentioned it was a picnic.

So we're just glazing over the whole 'Discord is talking to you through your magic-lighty-box-thing'? Okay, fine by me. It just makes everything so much easier.

That also sounds like changing the subject. But I said I'd humor you, so I'm gonna stick with that. It makes what easier?

Why, taking over Earth, of course!

...

Hey, I heard that!

It's just that... do you really expect me to help you take over the world? From my laptop?

I'm not saying it won't take time. And besides, it says on your 'Tumbleweed' you're already part of an army trying to get Loki to rule your planet, so why not me too?

Sigh... It's called 'Tumblr', and that's mostly a joke. Wait... how do you know who Loki is?

We're getting off-topiiiiiic!

Right, right. So, in my supposed aim to get you to rule Earth, what would you have me do?

Um... What?

I'll make it simpler: Discord, what do you want me to do?

...Um...

Wait a minute. You, Discord, do not have a plan?

Well... to be honest, I thought you'd be a bit more resistant. I thought I'd have to fight you in this crazy battle-of-the-wills and in the midst of that, I'd think of something ingenious. Sooo, no. Not technically.

So what you're saying is that you're no more dangerous than a voice on my laptop until you think of something?

Uhh, yeah actually. Pretty much. Couldn't have put it better.

Well... Since you're here...

What? Well, spit it out, human!

My name's, uh, Isabella... no, um... GalifreyGal... no... Um, how about you just call me Delta?

How 'bout I just call you 'Human'?

Anyway, since you're here, and you were complaining earlier about my writing being out of character for you...

Uh-uh. No way. No-h-h-ho wayyy. I am NOT and I repeat NOT going to help you with your writing! Especially if you're going to write this awful, untrue, completely false stuff that never, ever happened. Especially not last week. Nope.

Oh come on, Discord! It's the least you can do if I help you take over Earth!

So you've agreed to help me, then.

No! Wait, yes. Uhh, how about we strike a deal?

Ugh. I'm listening.

I will promise to help you in any and every way I can to help you take over Earth. In return, you have to help me with short stories about you.

Let me think. Hmm... no.

Oh please! How many authors get the opportunity for the character to write his own dialogue? Or check if it's completely character-accurate?

I said no, which means yes. I mean, no.

Listen to this idea, then.

Nope. Not listening. LALALAAA-

How about I write two separate kinds of stories? On one hand, I'll do my cute ones with reformed-you and the Mane 6. On the other, I'll think up ways you could take over Equestria again, which might inspire you for Earth. 3:1 ratio.

Okay, you've managed to catch my attention. Well done, by the way. Alas, your ratio is the wrong way around. It should be 1:3.

Or, to make everyone happy, every second chapter. Deal?

You're so predictable. It must be so boring in a land without a King of Chaos. Fine, Ms Human. You've got yourself a deal. But we're starting tomorrow. You look tired.

...

...That's Fluttershy's influence, I swear. I was never this sappy before. But seriously, go to sleep. I don't want my only means of escape falling asleep on the light-box. As much as I hate to admit it, I need you.

Gee, thanks.

Don't get used to it.


A/N: Wow, okay. So Discord can talk to me now. If I've finally gone crazy, well...
To those of you who were genuinely looking forward to the Fluttercord picnic, don't worry! It shall return!

((This is a weird new way of writing a Fanfic for me, so if it's awful, please let me know. If someone else had this idea before me, I'm so very sorry and I had no intention of stealing it. Anyway, I hope to see you in the next chapter!))