Secret Truths
By Verse12
Verse12 (at) Hotmail (dot) Com
Disclaimer,
By do not own these characters nor do I claim too, this is a simple fan based homage. Their creators and the companies they work for and with own the characters and all that pertains to them. (I.E. Rumiko Takahashi, Viz, Shougakukan, Gaumont Television, Rysher Entertainment, Davis-Panzer Productions) This is just fans of the shows expressing their love for it for fun, no profit is involved or expected thank you.
Authors Note: ( ) stands for written text.
Revised: July 1, 2005: Large rewrite of story and improvement of spelling and grammar.
Nabiki sighed heavily and wearily turned from the lecture that was being given to her sister and her sister's fiancé. Her father and both of Ranma's parents were really laying into them, as Akane fumed in anger over the whole situation. Although I can't really blame her if it had been my wedding that had been ruined I would have been pissed off too.
'That was harder than I thought it would be,' she thought. 'The parents were pushing so hard to get them married. To throw a monkey wrench in their plans I really had to scramble to screw them up.'
She sighed again and glanced back at him as he sat there with a sheepish look on his face. His clothes were burnt and his body was bruised. It was all she could do not to run screaming to him crying her eyes out as she begged him for his forgiveness.
But she couldn't, She had to do what she always did, she walled it off behind her barricade of ice to protect herself and she trudged upstairs.
She went to her room and locked the door; she reached under her bed and pulled out a small lock box from a hidden compartment. She unlocked it and reached inside, the middle Tendo daughter then pulled out a diary and a half empty yellow legal pad. She opened the hidden catch on the sealed book and sat at her desk.
She pulled out a pen and flicked thru several pages that were filled with her cramped hand written text. She came to the next blank page and sighed, as she tapped the pen on her teeth and she thought for a second on what to write. Then she shook her head as she placed the pen on the paper and began to write.
Dear Diary;
Ranma and the others came back from china today, so of course the parents decided to put on a big wedding for them.
It took everything I had to prevent it and of course Ranma took the brunt of the beating. It hurt me so much to see him look so hurt and alone. Plus to see the glances that were being shared between him and Akane, I don't know I got scared... scared of losing him... for real.
I don't know what happened in China and surprisingly I couldn't get anyone to tell me about it. But I know that they are getting close, REALLY close, and that is killing me. Having to hide my feelings and true self, having to live this lie, is so hard.
I tell you Saotome you'd better be worth it.
Nabiki sighed slightly and closed the little book; afterwards, she locked it up and replaced within the secret compartment.
With a shaking hand and a muttered "can't believe I'm doing this again" she grabbed the yellow legal pad and began to write a letter, one she knew she could never show to anyone else.
(Once again I'm writing a letter to myself, a letter I can never show to anyone for fear of it falling into the wrong hands.)
(I know that after I get this off of my chest I'll have to destroy these pages, but I need to let this out. This is the only place I can deal with this, I dare not even write of this in my regular diary. Its just that I have no one I can talk to about all that has happened, some times I feel so alone.)
Nabiki paused for a moment as she thought over what she was doing before she continued to write.
(I just wish I could I could talk to someone about this, but my Ranma told me to tell no one else, before he had to… leave.)
With a snort of amusement at her melancholy musings Nabiki wrote on, (besides no one would believe the truth anyway, even here in Nerima. It's more fantastic than what even most Neriman's would believe. No one knows or can know, anything about this; at least until Ranma's little...experiment is finished. Besides sometimes I think I've played my role a little to well, no one believes the little ice princess… really has a heart, or knows when it's…breaking.)
(I've lived the life of the cold mercenary for so long that I find it hard to just open up, even just to myself, that's why this outlet is so… needed, so I can keep a hold on my true self. I just hope that Ranma's feelings won't have changed with all that has happened to him. Will he still care for me like he said he would? After so much time has passed and we have both become so different?)
(Every time I look at him it hurts so much, to have to be so cold to him, to have to do as he told me to, to abuse him and push him away, to make him distrustful of me. It about breaks my heart to do it, but I have to remember that what we are trying to accomplish is very important. I have to be strong I have to remember his words to me all those months ago in Paris.)
Nabiki paused as she recalled Ranma's exact words to her as they sat in a luxurious study in the city of lights.
("No matter what happens, remember the truth of how I feel about you, that I trust you. And that I know you will do what you have to, so you can protect us and what we are trying to do. I know that I can believe in you, and that you will watch my back while I am..." At that he paused and smiled for a moment before he continued. "Indisposed, so you do whatever you need to so we can hopefully make a better future for immortals… and ourselves.")
(Then he kissed me and looked me deep in my eyes; I knew that as hard as it would be to live with him and be the only one of us to remember all that we shared, that in the end it would be worth it. That I would never give up, that I would see to it that he and I would be together again.)
The middle Tendo Sister thought some more before she began to write once again.
(I've written all this down so many times before, it gets so hard some times that I have to let it all out. Having no one to talk to means I have keep it bottled up inside, and so I write it all down from time to time to keep myself sane, and to keep everything straight in my mind.)
(I mean, I still can't believe how all this happened. For so long I was second fiddle to Akane, all the boys were ga ga over her. So when daddy announced a new fiancé for one of us, I figured that maybe whoever he was maybe I could get him to like me.)
(And then Ranma showed up.)
(I admit that the curse scared me, I thought I understood how the world worked. But to find out that a man could turn into a woman with just water, it really freaked me out. I'm still surprised I was able to hold it together and not faint. But after I got to realize how good a guy he was and that the curse didn't really change who he really was, I grew to regret throwing him onto Akane. She didn't realize what she had, and by that point I felt that it as to late to do anything about it. So I put up a wall of indifference and sarcasm just to protect myself from getting hurt… like when mother died.)
(After a few months it grew harder and harder to keep that up. Then when one day after school he just up and disappeared on us I didn't know what to do. I was shocked at how deeply his disappearance affected me. I was feeling as frantic on the inside as any of the fiancée brigade were, though I was much better at keeping it to myself.)
(For two days there was no word, everyone was going crazy you can imagine the reactions. I had feelers out everywhere and then just by accident I happened to see him walk out of a known yakuza hang out. I followed him from a distance; afraid that he was going to not only get himself but all of us in to big time trouble with the yakuza, and that's the type of trouble no one wanted.)
(Years ago, I was the heir to the Tendo school of anything goes martial arts but like Kasumi before me, I decided to stop practicing the art after mother passed. I still practiced some of the stealth techniques on the side though, and this is why I thought I could follow him unseen. I should have known better though, he told me later that he saw me before I even noticed him and let me follow him. Though he never did tell me why he decided to let me follow him, especially after all I had done to him in the months I had known him.)
Nabiki shook her head and muttered to herself, "No since getting ahead of myself, just once I'd like to get thru this without going off on a tangent," she then sighed and began to write once more.
(Anyway, from there he went to a travel agency, and evidently let me over hear him as he booked a first class trip to Paris? I mean PARIS? That totally threw me for a loop I didn't think Ranma could finance a trip to the zoo, let alone Paris, and first class to boot? HOW? I wondered. When I heard that he was going to leave that day, I quickly ran to a payphone that was outside of the travel agency and called my number one associate. I told her to quickly go to my safety deposit box and get my passport and some money from it for me, while I kept my eye on Ranma.)
(I heard him leave the shop while I was on the phone so I had to hide and the only way to do that was to just kind of turn away from him and hope he didn't notice. It was lame I know but it was all I could think of at the time, and it seemed like it worked. At least I didn't see any evidence of his noticing me at the time, though he told me later that he had to bite his lip to keep from busting out laughing.)
(Once he was gone I followed him till he stopped at a little café. Once I was sure he would stay put for a while I went back to the travel agency to try and bargain as low a cost fare as I could on the same flight as Ranma I had to know what he was up too, I just couldn't back down.)
(Later that night I met my associate at the airport and after a few instructions to her I caught the same flight as him, while I tried to not be noticed. Fortunately I was stuck all the way in the back of the plane, while he went to the first class section in front. And since this was a 767 we had about two hundred and forty people between us, so I felt safe that he wouldn't notice me. But what I didn't think of was that when the plane landed after a VERY long flight I ended up being one of the last passengers off. And Ranma had been let off first with the other first class passengers, so he was long gone. So there I was alone in another country and with only the money my associate had gotten for me… and my guts. For once I had to admit that I hadn't planned things very well, in fact I had just been reacting to events and not making the events work for me, like I usually try to do.)
Nabiki smiled as she wrote that part, and thought about just how scared she really had been. She thought about how she believed she might have made a Genma sized error in her haste.
(As I made my way toward customs I saw a glimpse of him just leaving the customs area. He told me later though that he had to hang around while I caught up and that people were starting to give him funny looks because he kept hanging around. I went to where I last saw him once I cleared customs myself; he always seemed just at the edge of sight. Turning a corner or going through a door just before I would have lost him, and this is the manner in which we made our way outside of Charles DeGaule International Airport. As I stepped outside into the cool French night for the first time I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I had always wanted to see Paris… I just never thought it would be this way. I watched Ranma as he got into luxurious courtesy car sent by a VERY exclusive and expensive hotel.)
(I only brought a bit of money with me so I had to be strong, I tried to not let the fear at being alone in foreign country get to me. I choked down my fear and decided to do something about my problems. I headed back inside and found a place to change my Yen into Francs. I then hailed a cab and used my very questionable French to go to the hotel from which the courtesy car Ranma had gotten into had come from.)
(After a long yet gorgeous drive we pulled up to without a doubt the most stunning building I had ever seen, it was not overly ostentatious but so classy it just seemed to radiate prestige from its every brick. It was the Hotel De'Aurore and it was the most exclusive and expensive hotel in all of France, or so the cabby said… I think, my French wasn't the best.)
Nabiki allowed her mind to remember those first frightening, yet exhilarating moments in France. "I had NO idea what I was getting into," she murmured to herself. "And I wouldn't change a moment of it," she smiled before she bent to write once more.
(I stepped out of the cab with a mumbled "merci" while I handed him way to much money… I had to be in shock at the time. All I could do was look up at the edifice before me; the graceful lines and exquisite details were almost enough to bring me to tears. My stupefied gaze though was broken as I heard Ranma talking to the doorman, he was leaving the hotel after checking in, his perfect French I might add, really blew my mind. My level of confusion was at a place now that I didn't know what to do so in a daze I just followed him as he went in the direction that the doorman had indicated. I didn't even try to conceal myself anymore I just trailed along behind him by a few meters, I was desperate not to lose him again, I was worried of being alone in a strange county… and I felt a little… vulnerable.)
(He crossed rivers and wound his way thru confusing little streets, and I began to get a little paranoid, what if I was wrong? What if this wasn't Ranma? What if it was just some freaky look-alike? It's not totally impossible with all of the crazy things in Ranma's wacky life.)
(He finally turned into a little blues club; I just hoped for the best and followed after him a few moments later. And what happened was that I seemed to have walked into a nightmare, for what I saw was Ranma Saotome, mister I don't use weapons, as he plunged a katana thru a man's chest. I know I must have screamed because he turned to me and another man, a Caucasian with long hair slashed Ranma's back with a sword of his own. I didn't know what was going on at the time; in fact I still don't understand everything. But the next thing I knew I had cried out "NO" as I saw that longhaired man was going for a killing blow to Ranma's chest as he knelt on the floor before him. I ran faster than I ever had before and I threw myself on top of the young man who had somehow despite my best efforts wormed his way into my heart. I cried softly as I waited for the blade to fall and I hoped it wouldn't hurt to much, all the while I wished I could save Ranma as he had saved all of us so many times.)
(As I lay there, with my eyes squeezed shut I pressed my body to Ranma's to protect him but after a lengthy period of time I cracked my eyes open as I realized that nothing had happened. I focused through my tears as I heard a voice as it spoke in English.)
(". . . ything rash MacLeod." I looked over and gasped as I saw the man who had just had a blade thrust through his chest just moments before as he stood up and looked none the worse for wear… that is except for a few bloodstains.)
(I fazed out from the shock of it all for several minutes and before I realized it Ranma had carried me, in his strong arms over to a booth on the side of the room. He set me down and he looked me in the eyes as he asked if I was okay.)
(All I could mutter was a confused "How?" as I looked up in to his warm blue-grey eyes. He sighed as he stood back and looked over to a middle aged man with a cane and told them I was in shock. I was so out of it I didn't even understand what was going on, I looked over to the longhaired man who was obviously named MacLeod and the man who had been impaled by Ranma, who was evidently named Pierson. They argued in English about "how could he (MacLeod) know what was going on, even in our lives you didn't just rush in and ram a sword thru someone like that, of course I was going to attack him back for you. There was no formal challenge how was I to know you deserved it and that he wasn't planning on taking your head?")
Nabiki paused her writing and she thought back to when Ranma later told her that Pierson had, had something to do with him ending up in Genma's care. 'If that isn't a reason to stab somebody I don't know what is,' she thought to herself with a chuckle.
(I was puzzled over the bizarre facts I had overheard, Ranma came back in with the older man named Joe he was carrying a blanket and a glass of water. He had me drink some of it, and soon I fell unconscious. Evidently Ranma slipped me a mickey, I'm still upset at him for that, but I guess I needed to rest and I couldn't do it without some chemical help.)
(I came too the next morning and I felt unbelievably great, all things considering, I woke up in the lap of luxury so that kind of explains that, huh? A few moments after I had woken up I realized that I had been lying on a giant canopy bed in a room that was right out of the storybooks. I sat up and looked around just as someone knocked on the door, which caused me to mutter a stunned "uh, come in" as I wondered just where in the world I was.)
(In strolled Ranma with the grace and power that filled his body as usual, he smiled and looked at me with a special twinkle that I had never seen before, "so up at last sleepy head." HE then grimaced in apology as he added, "I'm sorry about slipping you that sleeping pill last night but we were afraid you would get hysterical.")
("Hysterical? Of course I'm going to get hysterical," I told him, "I mean you disappear fly to Paris, first class I might add. Stay at a place that probably costs more a night than the dojo is worth and you stab a guy thru the chest at a blues club, who then I might add gets up as if nothings the matter. Why should I get hysterical." I said as I threw up my hands in exasperation.)
(Of course I was hysterical but I think that was kind of justified. I got a little more control over myself after that though and asked him if he got in trouble with the yakuza and if they were making him do jobs for them. This was the most likely scenario I had come up with.)
(He laughed at my antics as I flailed my arms around wildly and babbled like he usually did when he tried to explain after someone caught him doing something they thought was perverted after a minute Ranma managed to croak out "No, no.")
(I looked indignant over his laughter I'm sure, so I placed my hands on my hips and sat up in the bed. But before I could say anything Ranma calmed down and waved his hand at me as if to say calm down then he said that it was nothing like that. He then continued as he said, "I just wanted you to know that breakfast is ready in the drawing room, okay?")
(I nodded my head but I still kind of sat there in disbelief, all the things I went through the last day or so had left me kind of numb. But then I saw Ranma as he smirked at me and looked down at my chest area, this of course caused me to look down as well, which caused my eyes to widen as I realized I was only wearing a sheer negligee. Since I didn't have this on last night and in fact I didn't even own something like this I was certainly stunned and beginning to get an almost Akane like anger that began to build up in me. And then while I was looking down the jerk made a wry comment about how I may want to put some thing more substantial on before coming out for breakfast.)
(And of course he laughed at my indignant squawk and attempts to cover myself, as he strolled out of the room. My pillow of course hitting his head ended his good-natured laughing. He still chuckled a bit as he looked over to me and said that one of the maids had changed me last night and that some new clothes were placed into the armoire on the far wall.)
A loud bang rang from the door of the locked room and jarred Nabiki from her cathartic writing.
She held her hand over her heart at the sudden shock; she then looked over at the door and composed herself before she replied with her usual icy and abrupt demeanor, "Yes, What is it?"
From the other side of the door Akane's voice growled out, her tone of voice still filled with anger over the failed wedding earlier, "Daddy wants everyone downstairs to help fix the Dojo."
'Oh little sister will you ever be able to face me when all this is over, and is it even worth it.' Her thoughts turned to all of the walks on the Champs-Elysées that she and Ranma shared. And of all the other things that happened between them after that first night in Paris and she realized that for good or ill she had to do what she had to do.
"I'll be there in a minute," She replied to her growl with a cold tone of voice, as she ignored the ache that was inside of her. As her little sister stomped away Nabiki allowed the mask she wore to fall from her face for a moment and she allowed a tear to run down her face.
She whispered, "I'm so sorry little sister, I hope you can forgive me someday."
She turned away from her desk and pulled the paper she had been writing on off of its pad and she stuffed it into the pocket of her jeans. The middle Tendo daughter placed everything else back the way it was before. She then took a deep calming breath before she wiped her eyes and unlocked the door as she headed out with thoughts still returning to that time in Paris.
'I never have enough time to write all that happened down, it does seem to help get me through these tough times. Just being able to get it all out in the open even for myself, but I truly wish I could just talk to Ranma one more time about all that has happened, just to be held in his arms one more time.'
She slowly walked over to the stairs and headed down her thoughts turned dark, though she was able to keep her face calm and cool. 'I wasn't even able to get to the good stuff though in my little written therapy, of how Ranma explained things to me. About immortals and the game, how he knew Pierson and Dawson, and of course how he was found by an evil immortal by the name of Wolfgang back in Nerima just a few days earlier. How he told me about the fight he had with him and how the giant warrior stabbed him in the back, he told how he felt his life flow from his body. I never got to write about how soon after he had revived Wolfgang tried to take his head.'
Nabiki paused at the base of the stairs and shivered at the thought of Ranma dead… for good. 'If he had been anyone but Ranma,' she thought 'Wolfgang would have succeeded in taking his head. But being who he is and how his life seemed to behave Ranma ended up taking Wolfgang's head, though it was by accident on Ranma's part.'
'When the quickening hit him,' she thought, 'He remembered, he remembered everything that had been suppressed, how he was not a new immortal but an old one. Seventeen years ago he discovered the age altering mushrooms and inadvertently ate some. And what those things do to an immortal is unheard of in their history, and that's how we ended up doing what we are doing today.'
She strolled out to the dojo and made a wry comment to the others that were already working on the clean up. They all began to straighten up the dojo and as they began to pick up some pieces of debris and other detritus her typical laid back manner was but a mask for her inner thoughts. They were still running back to the last times she was truly happy… happy with her Ranma.
'I wish I could tell him all of this,' her mind ruminated as she helped Kasumi bag up the mess of food on the floor. 'He didn't want me to influence how things would proceed though, beyond my usual money making schemes. He never did tell me why it was so important that I don't interfere beyond that, until I know when I have to. Although it would be nice if told me how I would know when it would be necessary to step in fully.'
'Most people would probably never believe me about us, especially given the reputation I have gained both before and since. But during that month that we spent together in Paris he told me how he had stumbled on the age mushrooms. And how he had realized after the incident with Wolfgang that they seemed to return an immortal back to a pre-immortal state. They also seemed to do as they did with non-immortals, that they turn the ingesty to the same age as that of the length of the stems on the mushrooms. He told me that if this same incident could be perfected for all immortals and if it could work multiple times it could be the answer for a host of issues that plague immortals.'
'Ranma wanted to test the process out again on himself,' Nabiki thought as she dragged a bag of trash behind the dojo for later disposal. 'Of course he had to see if maybe this could be the answer for all those children who had become immortals before they were ready. And maybe it was the answer for all those mortal spouses and adopted children of immortals who were currently doomed to grow old and die long before their immortal loved ones. So here we are in the situation we're in and I'm the one stuck keeping track of everything, trying to manage all of Ranma's plans for him while he can't do anything about it . . . and hoping he will still care for me like he did when he finally gets his memories back again.'
'I still think he held back stuff on me though, things like how he ended up with the Saotome's, and a bunch of other things as well, some were little more than hints or inferences. In the end I decided to trust him and I will continue to do so for as long as it takes,' she thought emphatically as she threw the bag of garbage she was lugging over with the others.
She paused as she walked back into the dojo and looked over to Ranma as he tried to move a fallen beam, a slight smile crossed her mouth as she watched him struggle with the huge hunk of wood. She was startled out of her musings though as Ranma looked over to her, and asked, "What's with the smile?"
She covered up her mistake nicely though as she smiled at him with one of her best and most ruthless mercenary smiles and responded "oh, I just thinking of how much you'll owe me after all the damage costs are tabulated." She turned away at that and could only laugh at his indignant squawk and how exclaimed that, "none a this was his fault."
"Of Course Ranma-kun, of course," she replied as she smiled her secret smile, "of course" she whispered while she thought 'someday, someday I can be my true self . . . and maybe make a little cash' she ended her reflections with a little mercenary smile that was hiding her true self… as always.
To be continued:
New End Notes:
Well I was waiting for my proofreaders to finish editing the newest chapter of 'Only Human' I felt like working on this edited version of this. I hope you all think it's an improvement, I certainly do.
I have some plans for this now after working on it, I'm going to revise chapter two of this and then I have a great plan for a chapter three and beyond.
Let me know what you all think,
Later.
Old End Notes:
This is just a little something I put down.
Also it was not becoming an immortal that unlocked the memories sealed by an immortal eating the age mushrooms and becoming an infant pre-immortal. It was the quickening from Wolfgang that unleashed all of his old memories.
I just thought the age mushrooms might have an interesting effect on immortals. Anyway let me know what you think, so please review thanks.
Signed: Verse12
