Jackie Burkhart and Steven Hyde wish more than anything that their relationship hadn't ended. That all the bad things would've never happened. It begins immediately where the series finale left off, a minute after the clock hits midnight. The first few chapters deal with the agony our favorite couple is going through; it'll only be the really angsty part of the story. A primarily angst free story might seem boring but after all these young lovers experienced at the hands of the retarded show writers, they deserve happy times. I assure you though, a LOT is going happen. This is my first fic, so try to go easy on me. Now, let's get started.
Disclaimer: I don't own That 70s Show or its characters…if I did, it would've ended on a much happier note. I also don't own any of the music I've selected for this fic.
A/N: In this chapter and throughout the ones to follow, I'll be including 70s music. Part of the reason I liked That 70s Show was because the characters favorite music is some of mine too. I was a big fan of Zeppelin, The Stones, The Who, etc. long before I started watching the show, and I liked how my generation (those of us born in the 80s) began taking an interest in the music of that era. Some of the songs in this story will be ones the characters are listening to on the radio. Some songs the characters won't even hear; it'll be something that sets the mood. Think of it as a movie soundtrack :) The first of those is The Who's "Behind Blue Eyes" which is the chapter title. FYI, the title of this fanfic comes from lyrics in "The Speed of Love" by Rush from their 1993 album "Counterparts".
January 1st, 1980
12:01 A.M.
Steven and Jackie sat on opposite sides of the Forman's living room, oblivious to the New Year's celebration. They tried their best not to look in each other's direction, but they both stole a few glances when one of them wasn't looking. His head bent over and his glasses off, Steven dried his tears as he thought of the last several months. He felt terrible about how he'd treated Jackie; he didn't notice at that moment Jackie was likewise hiding her tears. The two wanted so badly to go to each other and renew their love, but something seemed to hold them back and it wasn't reluctance. Both Jackie and Steven, at that moment felt they didn't have the energy to stand, let alone comfort each other. They felt so drained, as if they were going to vanish from the world entirely. Steven looked over at Donna and Eric, seated on the couch with their arms around each other kissing like crazy. Secretly, Steven had always admired them for being openly affectionate and honest in their relationship.
"For all the insults I gave my adoptive brother about how it isn't "manly" to be affectionate to Donna, I really don't believe that about Eric. I think he's more of a man than I can hope to be, especially regarding girls. I could've been more loving to Jackie, but it was "manly"…or so I thought."
Across the room, Kelso was trying to squeeze himself into Red's usual chair where Jackie was now seated. If this wasn't annoying her enough, Kelso, in his typical fashion, asked her if she wanted to have sex with him. Jackie snapped a very emphatic negative response at him; she shoved him off her, headed through the kitchen and out to the driveway.
Steven was disgusted by what he saw, "I've had enough of that moron…I should've been more pissed by all that he did to Jackie and me…well…it's time he got it shoved through his thick skull and saw what he's done." He got up from his seat on the piano bench and walked over to Kelso, trying to summon all his willpower to keep him from punching the perverted doofus. Leo, in conversation with Bob, looked concerned as Steven walked by, but the younger man wasn't interested in what the aging hippie may have been thinking. Steven punched Kelso on the arm and said through gritted teeth "Leave Jackie alone! the basement…. Now!...we need to talk… "
They went down into the basement and Steven turned to face the guy he hated more and more with each passing minute. Kelso, not detecting his friend's anger, asked "Crap, Hyde what was that for?"
Steven was glad he had his glasses back on; he may have been mad as hell, but his tears still remained. It seemed even in the rare times he put his emotions on display, his friends still didn't understand him…or want to understand him.
"You're asking what it was for?! I couldn't have made it clearer!!! You, Donna, Eric and Fez, none of you ever took me seriously!!! It was always, 'oh look Hyde's showing us his feelings', but that's as far as you guys looked! None of you ever care about what I feel let alone try to realize what it's like to be me and all of you were quick to judge me!!"
No one knows whats it's like
To be the bad man
To be the sad man
Behind blue eyes
"None of you ever accepted Jackie and I as a couple, and you! YOU WERE WORST OF ALL!!!! I SHOULD BEAT YOU TO A PULP FOR WHAT YOU DID TO US!!!!"
No one knows what it's like
To be hated
To be fated
To telling only lies
"Okay, so this is about what I asked her just now," said Kelso. "C'mon it was a courtesy thing."
But my dreams…
They aren't as empty
As my conscience seems
To be
I have hours only lonely
My love is vengeance
That's never free
"Dammit why the hell do you keep harassing Jackie?!?!?! You've damaged her so much over the years, she's just a shell of what she once was!!! SHE WAS MY ENTIRE WORLD!! YOU BROKE US UP NOT ONCE BUT TWICE!!!!"
No one knows what it's like
To feel these feelings
Like I do
And I blame you
Kelso stupidly responded, "Well that's why I asked her if I could sleep with her, ya know, to cheer her up"
No one bites back as hard
On their anger
None of my pain or woe
Can show through
Steven grew even more pissed. "Son of a bitch Kelso!! When you will understand?!?! SHE'S NOT LIKE THAT!!!!!! Jackie is the most beautiful girl to ever exist; she's smart, she's fun to be with, she knows exactly what she wants in life…she is so incredibly sweet but you think of her and treat her the same way as those whores at the club you work at!!! YOU ALWAYS HAVE!!! YOU USED HER FOR YOUR STUPID SEXUAL URGES AND THEN YOU TOSSED HER ASIDE AS IF SHE WAS NOTHING!!!! HOW COULD YOU?!?! I ALWAYS RESPECTED HER AND NEVER PRESSURED HER ABOUT ANY OF THAT!!!!
But my dreams…
They aren't as empty
As my conscience seems
To be
I have hours only lonely
My love is vengeance
That's never free
I used to think you were just stupid but now I realize you don't respect her…YOU NEVER DID!!!" Steven threw his glasses at the wall so hard they broke. He wanted Kelso to pay attention to his mad eyes, to make him see this wasn't a joke whatsoever.
When my fist clenches crack it open
Before I use it and lose my cool
When I smile tell me some bad news
Before I laugh and act like a fool
"Don't you EVER lay a hand on her again, don't even attempt it…I don't know if she'll ever be comfortable speaking to me again or to even be in the same room as me, but Jackie Burkhart will always be the most special person to me…I'll never stop respecting her, I will never stop loving her and I will kill you if you so much as think of taking advantage of her!!! Now piss off Kelso!!!!"
And if I swallow anything evil
Put your finger down my throat
And if I shiver please give me a blanket
Keep me warm let me wear your coat
Kelso, evidently, still didn't get it because he laughed, "Ah, c'mon Hyde quit talkin all that crap, let's go cruisin for chicks!"
Steven's anger reached the boiling point. "WEREN'T YOU LISTENING SHITHEAD?!?! OUR FRIENDSHIP IS OVER!!!! LEAVE AND NEVER SHOW YOUR DAMN FACE HERE AGAIN!!!! FUCK OFF!!!!"
For the first time ever, Kelso didn't have a comeback, a burn, or a word of any kind to say. He looked at Steven's furious eyes and arrived at the conclusion that the best thing was to stay quiet and get the hell outta dodge. Which he did at once.
No one knows what it's like
To be the bad man
To be the sad man
Behind blue eyes
A/N: And that's the first chapter. I know, it probably seems stupid to have included the song, but I think it says everything that needs to be said about Mr. Hyde, our emotionally broken friend who I really feel for. Anyway, please R&R! I'd appreciate it! Up next: Steven is angry at Kelso for his role in breaking him apart from Jackie, but he feels angrier and even more disappointed at himself.
